Have you ever just wanted your spouse to make a big fuss over you?

Question

I watched the beginning of Braveheart for the umpteenth time tonight, and I love the way he tells her she's beautiful even though she doesn't speak the ?Latin he's speaking...but you can see it in his eyes. Why do I torture myself watching all the romance, when I know my husband is not like this!!!!

I have continuously made romantic overtures to my spouse. Made huge fusses over him, which he readily enjoys. The problem is reciprocation. I don't think it is unreasonable to expect a little romance. It doesn't have to be big screen proportions, but a little "I love you" every now and then. "God, you look great," when I get dressed for something special and look good enough for other people at an occasion to make a remark that I look nice. It's sad commentary when you get better compliments from others than from your spouse. I'm continuing to compliment him, though, and trying to grin and bear it.

Answer 1

Maybe he's not the type that will make a big fuss over you. What's more important is, how does he perceive you? Does he perceive you as drop-dead gorgeous? Does he appreciate you? And not just your appearance, but does he talk with you, and tell you how much he enjoys your company? Does he learn things from you? Is he your soulmate?

When a man loves a woman (please...keep Michael Bolton silent!), he may have his own special way of expressing it, and one man's way of expressing it may not be another's. It's unique to the individual. But if he adores you, you'll know.

Answer 2

I spent over 25 years with a woman I adored. I told her everyday how beautiful she is and how much I loved her. I felt good by telling her this. I gave her roses , gifts , sent her through college. Well, guess what , she NEVER reciprocated . Told me about 5 times in 25 years that she loved me. Basically , I gave her everything she wanted , just like what you are asking for. Basically , if you get everything you want , you lose the attraction for your spouse . He is predictable and a wussy. If you are a good couple , he is providing for you needs , you love him , he loves you. It should be GREAT. Me, I got a divorce after 25 years because of the verbal and physical abuse toward me from my wife. I hope no one gets a divorce. I would love to still be with her ...

Answer 3

Who doesn't?? If you want your spouse to make a fuss over you then start the ball rolling by making a big fuss over them. Go overboard in showing him you care and the love you give will be returned tenfold.

My hubby is not a big talker, but he shows his love in many ways. When he makes my breakfast or has dinner ready for me before work (I work graveyards). When he gets my coffee and how he always holds my hand. Not big gestures, but they mean alot to me... alot more than words ever could.

Answer 4

I used to be that way, where I didn' make a big fuss over my wife, and it's something that I've regretted, but I more than make up for it now. I tell her and show her that I love her, and try to spend as much quality time with her as I can.

Answer 5

Why are you comparing your husband to an actor in a movie? Those words are on the script. Life is not a romance novel or movie. If you want words of affirmation from your husband tell him you need to hear them. We all like to be made a fuss over, but tell me do you make a fuss over him? Do you tell him the things you long to hear?
Put down the soap operas and movies and quit comparing your man to Mel Gibson. No wonder you are dissapointed. How unfair to him!!

Answer 6

Yes, but remember you are married to a man! Fussing over is a girl thing, but if he does fuss over anything it's sandwich or sex!

Answer 7

Of course, I think most women would, not sure about men though. We all want to think we are very special to our spouses and hope they appreciate us and want to show it. My husband isn't great at it, but he tries. He is a sweetie.

Answer 8

That ended for me about 6 mo. after we got married.I would not know what to do if he ever made a big fuss over me.

Answer 9

how i'd wish my husband would be the most romantic type there ever is. but i'd just be daydreaming cause he's not. sometimes it makes me think only that i should make him jealous or something like that, cause i dont even get a i love you except during sex, thats lame, and whenever i try to look nice, he dont say nothin. it pisses me off, that he dont say those things to me, but like on tv with them girls he'd say it.

Answer 10

I used to want that and I used to give him surprise hugs and kisses, but the reciprocation is wanting, so I've learned to stop all the nonsense. He doesn't get it from me and I don't get it from him.