i met my husband when my son was 6wks old now my son is 3 are they are arguing most of the time its driving?

Question

me mad and im at the end of my teather.i no my husband is the grown up but my son does hit him i tell him off then there fine then something small happens and there off again pls help need advice serious answers plz

just for the record i have never smacked my 3yr old and dont intend to if my child hits i put him in his room.and yes it is amazing that a 3yr old can argue with his parents but it does happen.i do my best for my child and he gets everything he needs plus more and he goes to nursery and interacts with others im not one of thoes parents who put there children in front of the tv and leave them

all ur answers have suprised me it seems as though i am the one being the bad parent when all i want is the best for my family.

Answer 1

You are not a bad mum...Your son is at an age where he is pushing the boundries.
He is testing you and your hubby.
I think your husband needs to become more of an authoritive figure.He shouldnt be arguing with your son.He has been around for practically all of your sons life so I think that when it all starts again you should say to your son that your husband will take him out of the room if he carries on because you both dont like this very naughty and silly behaviour and then let your husband do just that...Your son needs to see your husband as a grown uo who he should have respect for.
He is only 3 and this needs nipping in the bud now.Nobody is at fault...It just seems that your son is maybe jelous of your affection to your husband OR that he doesnt see him as an adult.Work at it together and dont give empty threats to your son ALWAYS do what you said you would do.

GOOD LUCK TO YOU ALL!

Answer 2

Yes, you must leave him. I don't normally make such rash opinions but you have the story in "black and white." And it isn't just a guess or rumor. It is HARD always to leave a marriage and uproot a life and love...its hard to face the fact we might make mistakes, big ones! But sexual molestation is like many other sexual deviations it is driven by a compulsion that is beyond control (for whatever reason) and they cannot truthfull EVER be trusted to stop! Statistics and the experts will back me up on this! If you found the detailed information about "one incident" I can confidently tell you there have likely been more. When abuse of any kind is an issue, your FIRST and ONLY loyalty is to your child!!! WHEN you leave, have your child proffessionally evaluated and WATCH for signs...you will be able to count yourself lucky if it hasn't happened already. You HOLD NO GUILT in your choice of a partner and husband because you "didn't know." But now you do and YOU MUST DO YOUR DUTY AND LEAVE. As hard as it may be, don't look back...this is ONE area that has little if any HOPE of improvement, the only place to go from here while still with him, is DOWN. LEAVE! Blessings...hold your head up, make a plan and GOOOOOOOO! Bunny7

Answer 3

How can a 3yr old argue?. First off you must learn how to be a parent set some boundaries. If the child lashes out or hits he should have a area which he stays in until he calms down and then apologizes to the parent. I think your son is just rebelling against this male figure and well you have not shown him what is right and wrong and well since you have yet to set ground rules he is just walking all over the two of you.

You must not yell or tell off your kids talk to them in a calm controlled manner and explain to them why you are doing this.

Answer 4

Set the rules and stick to them. You son is only 3 years old and there are 2 adults in the house. He should not be arguing about anything at 3 years old - he's a small child. Disclipline is what you need. You're the boss, not the 3 year old.

Answer 5

wow...who's the adult here...you, your partner, or your son...seems like the kid is getting away with alot here...you need to nip that in the bud before things get worse, stop it now otherwise it will just drive you round the twist.....tell him NO it's not right to hit people...a little bit of discipline goes a long way, also because your partner has raised this boy since 6 weeks old, then he has a right to tell him off and make him see that it's wrong to hit people, he's his dad in my eyes so he should be putting his foot down with this child....maybe send him to his room or to the naughty corner, someone has to control this boy, otherwise he'll make your life hell, show him who's the adult here.....smacking him won't work, so make him stay in his room till he knows better, even if he screams the house down, make him stay there till he is quiet, he may be only 3 but he's got to learn that he cannot keep putting his hands on his parents....i think your hubby should be the one to discipline him too

Answer 6

It sounds like you are in denial. Listen to the responses here. You asked for help. Actually, you pleaded for help and now you are trying to make your kid sound like he's an angel.

You have not done your best for the child if he's been taught that' it's ok to argue and hit another person. That is bad parenting and it didn't happen over night.. You have created the situation by allowing it.

If your gets everything he needs plus more - he sounds spoiled. Start from scratch. Take everything away and allow him to start earning it back when he starts treating you and your husband with respect. He needs parents who are willing to discipline with love.

Answer 7

It is only going to get worse if you let the child run your house. In what world is it ok for your kid to hit and yell at an adult? You have let this happen.

You don't argue with a 3 year-old. He is probably sleep deprived, running on caffene, and begging you for help like most kids today. He needs a calm and structured environment. That's your job.

Do you have a scheduled bedtime and play time for your child? Does he get the attention he needs or is he just subject to watching you and your husband all day. I don't mean video games or t.v. Kids need real time with real people and boundries and expectations of what is going to happen next.

Please devote your time to raising your child properly. Most people have kids and think all they have to do is feed them and clothe them. That's not the case. You have a responsibility to spend quality time with him. Teach your child to read and play calmly and to get along with others. THis may mean taking away most of what he's been bombarded with - toys and gadgets he doesn't need or really want. All he needs is you and your guidance - all the time.

Answer 8

You never smacked your three year old. Welcome to the hell of your own creation. The answer is simple. Never argue with a child of three. You should not need to spank him more than a couple of times to make him understand the three strikes rule. Liberal political correctness has sown the seeds of the destruction of your family and anyone else who buys into that mindset. Spare the rod and spoil the child - well you have.

Answer 9

I am not saying that you husband does sth funny with your kid I am just asking: is your son afraid of him for some reason & he is telling you something by reacting this way? (I am sorry for asking this, but we can never be to careful)

It might be that your son is jealous & very possesive. How is he with others? Or when you are alone?

If you cannot figure out how to stop this get profesional help.

Answer 10

He is three years old, and they argue. I dont really see a problem here. Does your thrree year old see this man as a threat? Does he feel close? Does the man i your life treat your son like his own. Maybe there is another reason.

Well I really think you are just making a mountain out of a molehill.