About homosexuality and virginity? I'm just curious...?

Question

I'm really curious to find views on how gay people define virginity.
In the heterosexual world people are usually defined as virgins or non-virgins based on whether they've had penetrative sex or not and its a big deal for alot of people. And there is 1st Base, 2nd Base etc...with sexual intercourse being the pinnacle. And once you've lost your virginity its as though a person has passed a rite of passage.
How does this work in the gay community? For instance, if a gay man has had sex with a woman in the past but has not had sex with a man before is he a virgin? What sexual act constitutes losing virginity, particuarly in terms of lesbian sex when there isn't the climax of sexual intercourse?
Also, how are "virgins" regarded in the gay community (big generalisations so apologies!)? For instance, in heterosexuality some people regard virginity as a good thing and some people regard it as embarassing and a sign of being "un-trendy".
xxx

Hi everyone! To clarify the question I would just like to hear different views from the gay community. Virginity is such an emotive issue in the straight world and I was just fascinated as to how gay individuals view the issue or if individuals have a different take on things. Appreciate your answersxxx

Answer 1

I think for anyone, when you first do anything sexual that involves touching someone else's genitals to get arousal, that's virginity.

If you're going to compartmentalize it, then you can go from being a total virgin, to an oral virgin after you give a tuggie, then an anal virgin after you give oral, then a fetish virgin after you do anal, then you compartmentalize fetishes and stay a virgin in whatever you haven't done.

I'm a fisting scat and pee virgin yay.

I consider it loss of virginity when you've had some form of sexual contact.

I find it annoying when a gay man claims to be a virgin, yet he's given oral pleasure to every man in his city, and received it in return. I'm sorry, but you've been around the block at that point, in no way are you an overall virgin. Just an anal virgin.

Answer 2

as far as guys go if you have had sex your not a virgin if you have had sex but you have never been with a guy I have heard them say "I'm a gay virgin" but its not really that serious thoe as someone said earlier I know that in gay life if a guy has never had anal sex sometimes other guys dont want to deal with that because its not something that comes easily... you kinda have to learn what your doing because it can be painfull so it takes a while to get used to it and some guys dont have the patience for it... and as far as lesbians I would imagine its even harder to define what makes a lesbian no longer a virgin but for them its probably more of an emmotional thing if you follow the rules of penetration... but I think if you have an intimate moment with a member of any gender then you are no longer a virgin...

Answer 3

You're going to find as many answers about this as you are different kinds of sexual activity preferences. Some folks consider anyone who has had any sexual activity that involves another person and an ejaculation as loss of virginity.

Others think that anyone who has not engaged in Greek-styled activities as virgins.

Some even consider that unless you've been on the Greek receiving in, you're still a virgin.

All of this reflects the broader cultural context of valuing both virginity and virility. We used to value virginity in women because it meant that men could be certain any children she bore were fathered by him. Things have changed, however. Since we are now of two minds on this, and we want to define ourselves in the way that we feel most in sync with a positive cultural image, we define virginity through that personal/cultural lens.

Personally, I find the term relatively useless. Once you are engaging in sexual activities from making out to full blown kinky sex, who cares if the next step takes a way your virginity. In many ways, your state of mind was deflowered long before.

- {♂♂} - {♂♀} - {♀♀} -

Answer 4

initially make confident that guy is effective understanding you're literally not gay (on your information) and also you don't want any strings connected. Secondly, why no longer? supply it a shot. do not get the gay adult men desire up yet see how a lengthy way you are able to flow, in case you experience uncomfortable, say so. i will call a minimum of five immediately male acquaintances of mine that make out with me from time to time (sober or inebriated). And 2 of my immediately acquaintances who're slightly curious blew one yet another xD you may besides supply it a attempt if you're nevertheless youthful.

Answer 5

My opinion is if a lesbian is penetrated either with a tongue or finger etc by her partner then no, she's not a virgin. This applies only to girls that has never been with a guy obviously.

I like virgins, less possibilities of having a std/sti.^^;I don't care if your less experienced and probably really bad, practice makes perfect ya know.;)

Answer 6

The term "virginity" applies equally to men and women. It is not as has been stated a term for females only.
Irrespective of gender or persuasion, if you have performed penetrative sex or had it performed to you , you can no longer be called "virginal".

Answer 7

I'm not into "Trendy" definitions.
According to most definitions a virgin is a FEMALE who's hymen is still intact.

Granted, I do NOT believe that a female is a virgin if she's:

1) given or received oral sex
2) given or received anal sex
3) given or received manual sexual gratification

I'm sorry, but all this bunk passed around in schools with the big emphasis on "abstinence" has only created MORE PROBLEMS!
Girls are actually consenting to anal and oral sex because schools don't say these are actually defined as Sex!
This puts both guys and gals at risk for STD's....still!
Some girls actually believe that if they've been 'fingered' but their hymen is still intact that they're still virgins. (nope sorry, not buying that one)

Also...they hymen can be broken by other incidences such as vigorous activity or by accident.


The same holds true for guys...any type of sexual gratification received makes that person no longer a virgin.
I don't care if he's gay or straight. Or if She is a lesbian or straight.

Answer 8

Not sure what you are looking for here...I place NO value on virginity, an outmoded concept. The worst sex you will ever have is with someone who has NO idea of what they are doing. I suppose we all have to start somewhere, but I get a kick out of the "Virgin" bit as some kind of treasure! It is not a treasure to anyone but those who are so insecure in their masculinity that they cannot bear being compared to another. I see men who claim, "Virgin ***" ....what a horrible thought! Who the hell wants to deal with that problem..hurting them because they have no idea of how to relax, etc. No Thanks.

Answer 9

I think a hetersexual woman that has never been with a woman is a virgin to a woman but not to a man same goes with a man that has never been with another man but has been with a woman

Answer 10

I would say(as a lesbian) that to me,losing my virginity was the first time i had sex (& orgasmed) with a woman.