Coming home late... and having parents scold, nag, punish is a pain. Call out to teens and others adults. what can a teen do to hang out with friends longer and yet also to make parents happy. What to do?
2007-05-17 19:09:32 · 13 answers · asked by MikeC 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
to make your parents happy... COME HOME ON TIME!!!!!
maybe if you come home on time for awhile you can ask them to extend your curfew ....
2007-05-17 19:27:15 · answer #1 · answered by Andrea H 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Always introduce your friends to your parents. Let them know what all of you do when you all hang out. Engage only in activities that will make your parents proud. You are known by the company you keep. You can influence your peer group or be influenced by them. The choice is yours. Always remember that freedom and responsibility go together. When you have a child of your own, you will be able to understand things much better from a parent's perspective.
I had very strict parents too, but I found that their concern was for my safety and well being. So reassuring them by words alone doesn't help for too long, it must be followed through with some concrete actions. If you are willing to share your thoughts and feelings with your parents on a regular basis, you will see that they will give you the freedom to be responsbile too.
2007-05-17 19:27:50 · answer #2 · answered by Recluse 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It would be easier if you could adhere to your parents' schedule since they're in charge. It looks like you have a problem with authority. If the parents' schedule is not reasonable (what do your friends' parents say?) maybe you can talk them into a different schedule. However, you need to follow the rules or things will only get worse. The saying is, "You can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar". Try to handle this in a more adult manner.
2007-05-17 21:33:01 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be reliable and responsible in other aspects in your life; if not, your parents have a perfect right to nag or put you into the legal system where you will not be allowed any deviations.
My teen boy EARNED his right to hang out with his other teen friends after proving he was reliable and responsible after cleaning up the kitchen without being asked to do so in the future as he felt that if he made the kitchen dirty, it was his responsibility to clean it up.
2007-05-17 19:19:49 · answer #4 · answered by bottleblondemama 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Full disclosure: I'm 43 years old, and a mom.
Talk to your parents. Why is it that they don't like you to stay out late?
1. Because you're tired the next day.
Good point. Discuss with them what they think should be a reasonable bed time, and why.
2. Because they're worried about you, you little &?*&%!!
They love you. Sometimes you wish they didn't, but they do. You SAID you would be home by (), it's now two hours past, you're not home. If something has happened to you I will die of pain. Oh my God. What might have happened? Maybe someone had too much to drink and they had a car accident and my beloved daughter is lying in the hospital with jell-O for brains... or maybe the bus wasn't coming and she decided to walk & someone attacked her and she's bleeding to death in an alley somewhere... or maybe she got raped and... oh my God... what do I do? How late is too late? When do I call the police...
This is what's going on in your parents' mind. When you come in after all this, of COURSE they are upset!! They've just spent the last two hours thinking you might be dead... and you were just having FUN????
As a mom, this is what I say: I understand you want to spend more time with your friends. I completely understand that you don't want me in your hair. I also know that you are not allowed to hang out in bars and pubs. What I DO know is that, unfortunately, there aren't a lot of SAFE places for young people to hang out late at night. So if it's late, you're not home, and I don't know where you are, I worry myself sick. What, you want me to have a heart attack, you ungrateful little... (lol)
How about this: TELL ME where you are and who you're with. LET ME KNOW that you are safe.
Is there a good reason that you won't just hang out at home, or at a friend's house, where I know that you are safe? How about if I PROMISE that we'll pretend that we're not even there?
When you go out, CALL ME if you don't plan on being home when you are supposed to. TELL ME where you are going, and with whom. The first few times, I'm likely to say, NO, we said (such and such a time), come home right away or you're grounded. You see, I'm still not entirely comfortable with you being independent. Gosh, I still remember when you could fit in the crook of my arm! I don't know your friends that well. And right now, frankly, I don't trust you, because you never come home when you are supposed to. But if you do this regularly, that is, keep in touch with me, show me that you are mature and responsible and that you are taking good care of yourself, then I will slowly begin to trust you more. Then maybe one day you will call and say, "Mom, I'm at Suzie's house, we're having a great time, can I PLEEEEASE stay a little longer," and maybe I will say, "Why sure, dear, why don't you call when you're ready to come home and I'll pick you up. Oh, don't worry about waking me up. I can't sleep when you're out anyway."
LOL.
2007-05-17 19:32:17 · answer #5 · answered by twosweethounds 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you want to be treated like an adult act like an adult. if your parents say be home at 11 then be home at 10:55. if they ask you to do chores have them done before they can nag you to do them or if you see something needs to be cleaned or done around the house take the inititive and get it done. your parents will notice your newfound responsibility and might be willing to give you an extended curfew provided once you get the extension you maintain your grades and chores. good luck!
2007-05-18 06:12:18 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just listen to them. I know that it sucks right now, but trust me once you live on your own you will have plenty of time with your friends, but you will also have to pay rent, your phone bill, for all of your food, you will have to work, pay utilities. Just dont take them for granted, im sure that a few rules is not as bad as you having to do everything on your own. They just want whats best for you. I would say that if you want to hang out with your friends longer, then you need to be a good kid, gain their trust, then once you have done that then ask them about it. This wont happen over night, but the good things in life are worth waiting for right? Just be good, do your homework, help out around the house, ask to cook dinner, just do nice things for them and they will do nice things for you in return. Jes
2007-05-17 19:19:42 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
come home on time. at this point if you are coming home late and they are punishing you, you have already lost their trust. unfortunatly it is a fact of life that as long as you live under your parents roof, you have to adhere to their rules. untill you gain their trust back, you arent going to have any luck getting them to change the rules.
2007-05-17 19:14:32 · answer #8 · answered by Ashley M 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
come home maybe 15 min early.. do house work without being told keep ur room clean... make food for them... get them water when they ask.. just straight out listen to them... then they will think wow...they will think ur maturing and they will raise curfew... and stuff like that
2007-05-18 06:39:08 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
late is late...if your parents want you home at a certain time then be home at that time.....if you want a later curfew then you will have to obey the current curfew and then that will let your parents know that you can be responsible...and then they may lengthin it....good luck!
2007-05-17 19:16:56 · answer #10 · answered by niki g 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
there is nothing to do. You're a child, they're your parents. You can make them happy by showing them that you listen & obey. Simple...
2007-05-17 19:47:27 · answer #11 · answered by phxchik07 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋