Soemtimes I mention proudly to my husband or mother that I was considering doing something (like send a message to an ex boyfriend who I happened to find online at Myspace) but in the end I resisted the urge and did nothing. Instead of "good for you" or "wise decision" all I get are groans implying, "I can't believe you even considered it, what a loser." Isn't it better to admit the truth and overcome your first irrational instinct than to pretend I never felt or thought anything? Or are these people in my life just unsupportive, negative, and hurtful? What should I say in order to exhibit my psychological growth for their satisfaction, some of my only accomplishments in life, which would otherwise go unnoticed?
2007-05-17 05:28:18 · 5 answers · asked by JudyTang 2 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
You did not arrive on this planet to please or satisfy your mother, your husband or anyone else for that matter. Your only mission here is to realise who YOU are. You are in control of your own universe and the only person who can affect how you feel about it is YOU. Generally those that criticise the ones that want to stretch their awareness are simply frightened of being drawn out of their own comfort zone and, more than not, jealous of those who are prepared to take lifes chances. If it were not for the "Show-offs" "Dreamers" and "losers who always try new things and fail", we would have no aeroplanes, telephones, medicine, movies etc etc. So - stop valueing your life by those around you, follow your heart and open the doors that your "inner voice" tells you to and know this, the only obligation that you have is to fill your life with happiness and joy from whatever source you can find and you do not need the permission of anyone - only yourself. Send the message, open the doors, live YOUR life.
Love and peace........
Mac2martin
2007-05-17 05:47:59 · answer #1 · answered by mac2martin 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
At first glance, it sounds like they are being unreasonable, and that they have an unrealistic expectation of other people.
I don't know what your religion is, if any, but from a Christian standpoint, you are to be commended for being wise enough to resist temptation.
Maybe they are insecure, or maybe they think that you are bragging, or maybe they think that you are making this all up to be manipulative.
Maybe you shouldn't share certain things with certain people if you know that they cannot handle it. You don't have to lie; just don't bring the subject up around certain people.
====edit====
I agree with the first person, and the person just below me. You are ultimately trying to be the best person that you can be so that you can benefit from it. If other people notice, then good. If they don't, it doesn't matter. What other people think of you does not determine who you are. You and you alone decide who you are by what you choose to do. Resolve to become someone that YOU can be proud of.
2007-05-17 12:39:34 · answer #2 · answered by Randy G 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you resist the urge to do something you shouldn't consider in the first place, you don't deserve to get a pat on the back. If my wife came home and told me, proudly, that she didn't go ahead and have an affair, I'd be angry that she considered it in the first place. If I think about robbing a bank, for instance, and then decide against it, I shouldn't expect anyone to tell me what a great guy I am for not robbing a bank. This is the same for you not contacting old boyfriends.
2007-05-17 12:37:01 · answer #3 · answered by Mr. Grudge 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It's probably not wise to mention an old boyfriend to your husband. However; if you want people to treat you in a certain way, imagine that they are already treating you that way. Visualize the people in your life being proud of you. Remove all thoughts that they will be dissapointed or critical. Feel the good feelings that you will have when the important people in your life are proud of you. As you continually do this, you will notice it coming true.
2007-05-17 12:38:17 · answer #4 · answered by Conservative social worker 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
WOW - sounds to me like you are living your life to please others. Not good.
Also, most people are not interested in the decisions others make, or the occurences in their lives. Unless, of course, it affects them in one way or the other. I suggest you live your life for you...rejoice in your own growth - psychological and emotional - and stop expecting awards or praise for it. Its your journey...not theirs. Enjoy it, and don't let anyone bring you down...
2007-05-17 12:36:48 · answer #5 · answered by Super Ruper 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋