that he has to talk to more then me... he says he needs them and it makes him feel good and that me and his guy friends are not good enough.... says he has to have close female friends that I do not know in order to be happy!! What is up with this and is it normal (I dont think so)????
2007-05-17 04:28:01 · 21 answers · asked by JC 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I'm assuming you knew this before you married him. Everyone has the right to have friends, no matter what their sex. If he talks to them about intimate things between the two of you then I could see why you would be upset. Why are you not able to meet his friends? I'm sorry but they are not just friends if you aren't allowed to meet them. That is not normal. It is okay though to have friends of the opposite sex and just have a plutonic relationship with them. I have one friend in particular that I hung around with before I met my husband and now I am friends with his wife as well. I actually talk to her more. It's the secrets that aren't acceptable, something is definately up.
2007-05-17 04:40:28 · answer #1 · answered by Michelle 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
No I do not think it is normal for a married man to say he needs more then just his wife and buddies to make him happy. My husband has female friends but I know he wouldn't prefer them over me..
You need to tell him that you will not put up with his "need" for other woman, if you are not enough then he needs to hit the road.
2007-05-17 11:33:02 · answer #2 · answered by Shabby_Chic 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Affairs usually begin with an attraction to someone you know fairly well, someone you spend time with each week -- your friends and co-workers. These women are meeting one (or more) of your husbands emotional needs(what sounds like conversation and admiration) better than you are. And if he continues, one of these "friendships" will turn into an affair. I have suggested the same web site to many people that ask questions about a troubled marriage. It will give you so much insight. Please take the time to look, get on top of this problem before your marriage suffers the heart ache of infidelity.
2007-05-17 11:51:10 · answer #3 · answered by KDW 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I do NOT think that is normal. Are these female friends your friends too? This makes it WAY to easy for him to cheat on you if you have a fight. I would NEVER let my husband have female friends who he talks to more than me. When you get married, you have to put your spouse before yourself and it doesn't sound like he has done that for you!! TALK TO HIM< seriously!
2007-05-17 11:34:58 · answer #4 · answered by Melissa A 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You girls may think it strange, but do you ditch all your girlfriends just because you find yourself a husband. Dont be stupid right? I figure most people need a strong female & male influence in their life, just because you arnt the strongest influence or something doesnt mean you should shut them out.
Even lovie dovie couples need a mental break, to talk to other females/males about things. If you dont let him then its likely he will just go behind your back anyway, and the chances for him to cheat will be higher.
Just let him have some female friends, they cant cause any harm to the relationship that isnt already there.
2007-05-17 11:38:45 · answer #5 · answered by ChAtMaN 4 · 1⤊ 2⤋
There is nothing wrong with a man having female friends so long as they are not acting in an inappropriate manner. get a couple of guys friends and see how this works out. Then you have a bargaining chip.
2007-05-17 11:32:32 · answer #6 · answered by deadra m 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
That sounds a little odd. I would wonder about that myself. My hubby has a friend that is a girl. They have been friends since they were in elementry school, it does not bother me because they have know each other for a long time. I guess try and makes friends with these girls. Get to know them and go out with your hubby and them. If you see weird thing, confront him.
2007-05-17 11:34:16 · answer #7 · answered by Va princess 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think there might be a problem there. usually if a guy keep a girl a unknown from his wife/girlfriend, he is seeing her on the side (I've seen it first hand with one of my good friends) Let him know that you want to know who the friends are. If he truly loves you he will let you know the girls. If he won't tell, he cant be trusted.
2007-05-17 11:44:47 · answer #8 · answered by svenbbg 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I can't imagine how you are his wife and you are not good enough for him but, another female is.....There is something really wrong with this...I think you need to really stand up for yourself and tell him how you feel.....You shouldn't be putting up with something like this....I feel bad that you are even going through this but, you need to put yourself first and you need to love yourself more not to allow your husband to disrepect you!!
Good Luck***
2007-05-17 11:39:34 · answer #9 · answered by Yvette D 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
nothing wrong in him having female friends, as long as they dont take your place with him.he must assure you that they are mere friends and nothing more and you must know them to judge for yourself that nothing else is going on. if he isolates you from the company of his so-called female friends, then have another discusion with him that you would prefer if he brings them into the open'
2007-05-17 11:42:03 · answer #10 · answered by BROTHER DEAREST 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋