I need some good advice. I have been married 1 yr, I am 20yrs old, have a 11 mnth old and am expecting my second baby to my husband in 3 wks. I love him so much but we always argue about little things that turn into huge things. He doesnt get along with my parents, I dont get along with his. I'm sick of arguing in front of my child and dont want my children brought up around this. The other night we had a huge argument and he ended up punching me in the face and ripping my hair. I know he loves me so much and I'm scared of what my life would be like without him, that I would be lonely and dont want another guy. It wasn't his fault he hit me, coz I was arguing and yelling at him. What should I do? He wants me back and our baby is due in 3 wks.
2007-05-16 22:31:40 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Yes you leave him... there is never an excuse for him to lay hands on you. It will only escalate and it will be harder to leave. And OF COURSE it was his fault he hit you. forget about the fear of being alone. There are plenty of good men out there.
2007-05-16 22:41:08 · answer #1 · answered by karma 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
First of all, it was not your fault that he hit you. You are pregnant and he could have hurt both you and the baby. Arguing all the time is a bad thing not only for your health and mindset but also for your children. I suggest you get counseling soon or one day he may really hurt you or one of your kids. That much aggression really bothers me. The fact that a man hits a woman at all is wrong, but a pregnant woman, that's even worse. Please get some help if you plan on staying. If you decide to leave, don't be afraid. Be brave, take your children somewhere safe, maybe with relatives. Starting over is always hard but it's better than staying in an abusive relationship. Take care and good luck.
2007-05-17 05:39:51 · answer #2 · answered by vanhammer 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I was going to say something totally different until I read about the hair and punching. If he did that he doesn't love you. I don't care what he says. One doesn't hurt a person one loves. Yes leave him. He's a wife beater a loser. I don't care what you said before he hit you. He and no one have the right to hit you. The only way I would think it OK. Is if you had slapped him. In other words if you hit him and he hit you back well. But because you were arguing. Na it will just happen again sooner or later. Call your parents and tell them what happened. Next time he does it call 911 and press charges and make them stick. Don't drop them.
2007-05-17 05:42:15 · answer #3 · answered by Sunset 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It wasn't his fault he hit you? YES IT WAS! It was HIS hand that struck you; he is at fault. It takes two to argue, yes indeed, but ultimately he made a decision to strike you so he is responsible. He assaulted you and you should have called the police to file a domestic charge against him.
If you are always arguing, whether about big or little things, you have to choices: you either part ways with him or you two seek counseling. He has to find out why he is an abusive husband and you need to find out why you put up with that type of behavior.
2007-05-17 05:37:33 · answer #4 · answered by QueenLori 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Its d same case with me...only that he was my exbf not my husband.But the minute he raises his hand on you...whoever's fault it is, it is time to leave and get out of whatever relationship you are in.I know its hard,really really hard to leave someone.But hitting u means disrespecting u and a man who shows no respect deserves none.He doesn't know how to treat a lady and deserve to treated like a lady now specially when u r pregnant.Even if you had your good times, you should not put up with all that crap.You might not find a guy right away but ther are many men out ther who will treat u well and with respect.
You gotta move on from this relationship no matter how hard he tries to get back and believe me one fine day you will find happiness with a new man in ur life and life will certainly ikprove.
2007-05-17 05:47:13 · answer #5 · answered by void 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Mandy, STOP right at the part where it says he punched me in the face. A man who loves you doesn't do that. Actually men if they love you or not don't do that. It WAS his fault... sometimes we get frustrated and we yell... like you did, but we don't punch the person we are supposed to love in the face. We especially don't punch a woman who is about to give birth. For your own safety and that of your children you need to leave him sooner rather than later, and don't have him back unless he undergoes anger management. Real men control themselves and treat women with respect.
2007-05-17 05:41:02 · answer #6 · answered by Lauren J 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
After reading this pack what you need for a few days and get the heck out.. Call the police and tell them you are seperating and you need to go back for your things and you are afraid that he may become violent. They will rrange an escort for you to get the rest of your things.. Then file for divorce.. take him for everything he has for the next 18 years and get on with your life.
My god with so many decent men out there sitting home lonely all the time why do women want to stay with the ones that abuse them.
2007-05-17 07:33:53 · answer #7 · answered by Lost in Merryland 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow thats really hard to tell someone to just leave but all I can say is trust yuor own feelings.At the begining of your story I would say Im in the same situation me being 21 with a baby and another due until you said he hit you.I know how hard it is being young and trying to raise your baby with another on the way but now you should ask yourself if you want to keep getting hit and if you want your kids to be hit by him.
2007-05-17 05:56:51 · answer #8 · answered by K 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I went through the same thing you are going through. First and foremost your husband doesn't deserve you because he has no, NO right to put his hands on you and for him to have punched you in the face while you are pregnant with his child shows that he has a serious problem. For your safety and the safety of the child I feel that you should leave and stay gone for awhile. If you don't show to him that his actions are unacceptable this problem will continue to persist.
2007-05-17 05:48:44 · answer #9 · answered by chinalita1 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Okay you need to leave him, no matter how bad the argument or what you said he has no right to hit you, also it starts off with a single hit, but it may turn into beatings and i think that would be worse for your kids to grow up with than verbal fighting.
What would happen if he had hit you in the belly and you lost your baby? think of your kids.
It would be difficult but you and your children dont deserve that.
2007-05-17 05:36:59 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It doesn't matter how the argument got started or what you or he said. What matters it that he "punched" you and "ripping your hair". Not only are you a woman...you're a VERY pregnant woman. You are not safe if this type of thing happened. Stay away.
2007-05-17 06:47:45 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋