They've behaved so badly. All our children are suffering, his 4 and our 2. They've lied, cheated continuously behind all our backs, eg. they went on a $40k skiing trip together, 3 days in she called to say she'd made the mistake of her life. She came back, jumped straight into bed with me, "I'll never leave you again" said she left him in Europe over a week earlier. Then wife, sons and I went on a holiday together, happy sexy, fun!? When we returned her lovers wife sent me messages found on his phone my wife sent while we were away."In bed dreaming of Paris".."The stars are the limit of our universe". I confonted her, She justified it saying she had to let him go slowly because he might suicide. I then found out she slept with him only hours before she jumped into bed with me when she came home from her trip. One example of many very hurtful acts. What do I do? What makes people be so cruel. Is she sick? I want my life back. Do I move on or wait? Can I ever trust her? Been Betrayed!
2007-05-16 19:01:42 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Very bad situation and it will likely never be the same again. She obviously cannot be trusted. You should leave her or you will torture yourself, always wondering if she's being faithful. I had a friend go throught that and it is not worth it. Even though you have children, it would still be better to leave each other than to have them see what your relationship will eventually dissolve into.
2007-05-16 19:10:08 · answer #1 · answered by Sue 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know you love her but I could not stay with a woman that didn't love me. What she's doing is wrong but at least she is being honest with you about her feelings. My ex cheated on me and would have easily taken it to her grave like many other women do. I'm sorry for your situation because I know the pain of what you're going through but there's a couple of things to consider. Would you rather she constantly cheated on you, kept it a secret and lived a lie like everything was okay? I don't think that's the best way to live but that's how many people do it. I honestly hope your marriage can be saved but you left the ball in her court. You can let her decide the future of your marriage or you can do what's best for yourself. If your divorce is inevitable, then try to have a civil one where you get full or shared custody of the kids. After you've healed in time, perhaps you will find a good woman you really deserve. I wish you the best of luck.
2016-04-01 05:31:58 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hesitate to advise this but I think she has committed adultery in a most spectacular way and I would tell her to either go to marriage guidance or pack her bags and go skiing with loverboy. You can't trust her. Also I suspect you are a nice guy and she either fooled you (so she is deceitful) for a long time or you knew and did nothing (that makes you kind but weak) and she is just damned selfish. Give her a chance with the professionals. Also call the guy up and ask him if he is prepared to take her on. That could freak him out so much he runs away. She isn't serious about the guy killing himself. You sound as if you have lived with a woman who is a highly skilled actress. The fact that you have not wanted to damage her shows your kindness as great, I really feel for you man and I am sorry. Give her one more chance then if she refuses burn the bridge.
2007-05-16 21:59:33 · answer #3 · answered by pwwatson8888 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's proven beyond a shadow of a doubt that she cannot be trusted. She has lied to your face and will continue to do so as long as you are there to be lied to.
If you can live with having to share her with others, and after him, there will be others, if there arn't others right now, then more power to you, brother.
Maybe you need to get a girlfriend. Sounds fair. Maybe it should be his wife. Sounds very fair.
No, forget that. It's not right and we both know it. But, who could blame you if you did?
You got some decisions to make and I wish you lots of luck. I think I would try to get the kids raised and gone before I moved on, if I could find the strength inside of me to hold on that long.
Just don't do something stupid and end up in prison. No woman is worth that.
Your in my prayers. Good Luck
.
2007-05-16 19:22:38 · answer #4 · answered by Fade To Black 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it is good you are forgiving of her. and even better you think of the children. since the woman is on and off about getting together you should just dump her.
or hire a hit man to solve the problem really think of the insurance money and how much you can save not going to stupid divorce court. that's it hire a hit man . make it look like an accident. just take the pay for the man out weekly in odd small amounts of cash when you have a few thousand hire one and get this over with.
2007-05-16 19:07:35 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Once betrayed always betrayed! Trust was thrown out the window in Paris. It's called having your cake and wanting to eat it all up & then lick the bowl too!
2007-05-16 19:31:47 · answer #6 · answered by Andy K 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know this will sound harsh but please forget this woman. Even if she does have feelings for you,she has gotten herself into something she cannot get out of. I t may not seem like it , but ther is someone out there who will cherish you for the person you are. And besides if you two do get back together, you will never be at peace. In the back of your mind you will always wonder what shes doing........
2007-05-16 19:13:13 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
trust needs to be earned if you want to save the marriage be cautious the first thing to check is full screening planned parenthood for any venereal decease. then you might wonder and test the DNA of the children you have with her and yours, to assure that she was not cheating before and now she got caught. if she did it before she will do it again.... set out your expectations from her and if she gives you a reason to doubt ... doubt it!
2007-05-16 19:28:38 · answer #8 · answered by razorraul 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
trust her you got to be kidding. she only get worse on this pal i went throught the same thing in.2002. take this to heart you wasnt the one who cheated . it was her. ok and as far as her . [mistake]. i heard that myself move on and find a woman with morals with you children she hasent none at all or she would never did it to start with and children are the ones who suffer over matters like this as well in my opio ?
2007-05-16 19:19:33 · answer #9 · answered by the_silverfoxx 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She wants both of you, and you are letting her. Don't keep making allowances for her. You deserve a wife that you can trust. Cut your losses and move on.
2007-05-16 19:17:18 · answer #10 · answered by sc3578 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋