I might be pregnant with my 2nd kid and im only 16??

Question

i have a 1 year old and my mom was really supportive cause i was only 15 and stupid but i went to a party 2 months ago and got drunk n had sexx with some guy i dont know that well and now im starting 2 show the symptoms of being pregnant again? i dont want 2 get an abortion cause i really dont think i could handle knowing i killed an inisant baby 4 no reason..........my bf is mad cause it wont be his real kid....should i have the baby or get an abortion? and if your gonna answer meanly dont answer? im serious about this and dont want 2 waste my time reading mean answers

Answer 1

Only you can answer that--you really can't expect anonymous strangers on the internet to tell you whether to abort or not.

You may want to check into counseling to see why you value yourself and your family so little that you would get drunk and have sex with a semi-stranger despite the fact that you have a boyfriend (to whom you could have passed an STD, up to and including HIV) and a child. I'm not saying that meanly--I'm just saying that it helps to have a non-judgemental third party to help you sort it out. Good luck.

Answer 2

I know what you are going g through. I was 16 when I got pregnant with my first child. It was by someone I knew but the relationship between me and him was dangerous. I was forced to make the decision on my own which I don't think was the right one. I didn't believe in abortions until I got pregnant and it seemed like the right thing to do at the time. So once I had the abortion I felt so bad for taking away a child's life that I didn't even give a chance to live. I was very depressed for about 6 months. then I got into a serious relationship with the man that I am now married to. After about 4 months into the relationship I found out I was pregnant again and I was heated. I definitely did not want to be pregnant again and I sure as h*** was not about to have another abortion. He was about to leave for the military in a few weeks it was too much. To cut an even longer story short. I know your bf is really upset if he really truly loves you then y'all will get pass this but you can't make a decision base on him. You have to do what is best for you and the unborn baby. Every time I look at my daughter I think about the other baby that I aborted and I really regret it. It took a long time for me to forgive myself. Don't do something now that you Will regret later. Give the baby a chance. Good Luck Honey.

P.S. Never let anyone tell you your child/childern are a mistake they are gifts from God that we should cherish. If everyone thought that way then none of us will be here.

Answer 3

My mom was 19 when doctors told her she couldn't have kids. She was devastated. She got really close with my dad because he didn't want kids - seemed perfect. Obviously she didn't need condoms or birth control. Nine months later, my sister was born! Then three more. (My dad was none too happy about that, haha) My point is, get a second opinion. And if it turns out that you definitely can't have children, it's okay. You can adopt a baby from a mother when she is, like, a month pregnant. You can follow the pregnancy, go to her appointments, buy the baby clothes, and be there when your (yes, YOUR) baby is born! Maybe it isn't ideal, but it's what you have, and that baby will have a wonderful life that it never would have had if you'd had your own children. Okay? It's okay, belle fille. I'm sure you will make a wonderful mother someday.

Answer 4

I support you for not killing innocent babies but I don't support the lifestyle you are subjecting them to. You are raising them to be a part of this world and you don't want them to be burdens or outcasts to society. I know you are only 16 but you need to grow up now and make the best of this situation for your 1 year old and possible baby on the way. The fact is if you are pregnant it's only one more reason to change what you are doing. A loving mom doesn't get drunk at a party and have sex with someone they barely know and at 16 you should always use condoms. There are some scary STD's out there that can eventually cause cancer and possible death. I don't think you meant to do what you did because you are a kid but you can't be a kid and raise kids. You might even consider adoption whether open or closed; there are so many loving families that want babies and can't have them who also have enough money and stability to raise them. You would be doing what's best for you and the child.

Answer 5

Chick, you have to do what's right for you. First thing's first: find out if you're pregnant before you stress yourself out. If you are pregnant, it's time to tell your mom and anyone else important and trusted in your life (yeah, your boyfriend will probably be mad it's not his, and he has a right to be if you cheated on him) and make a decision. 16 is very young to be a mom of 2, but could you honestly abort this baby, then look at your other baby and think of what would have happened if you'd aborted that one, too? If you don't think you can handle an abortion, then simply don't get one. Although some women (about 10%) have no regret or guilt after an abortion, if you go in with doubts chances are you'll leave with regrets.

But you need to think seriously. Can you support another baby? Or is your mom basically supporting the one you have now? Is that fair to her? Just because you can't keep the baby doesn't mean you have to abort, though. Adoption is a very loving option that gives the baby a chance to live (something I'm sure I would find preferable to death or oblivion). I'm not saying it would be an easy way out for you...I'm sure it would be very emotional. But honey, you can find adoptive parents who will pay for your entire pregnancy and LOVE your baby, give him or her opportunities you may not be able to give because of your age and finances.

Or maybe your mom or boyfriend is filthy rich and can afford to help you out until you finish school and stand on your own feet. If this is the case, more power to her. Or maybe you're already supporting the baby you have now on your own and CAN afford to support another. I don't know. Only you can make that decision. But whatever you decide, make sure it impacts your life AND the baby's for the better.

Answer 6

When do you have the time to go to a party? I think you should do what you think is right. Abortion is NOT a form of birth control. You need to take a look at your life. Drinking at 16? You are a mother now, you have someone to take care of. It's NOT about you anymore! Have the baby and give up for adoption. The baby will have a better life. Go to Planned Parenthood and get birth control after this pregnancy. Good luck.

Answer 7

O.k you're 16 and you've made 2 mistakes that are going to follow you forever. I'm not going to tell you mean things but I'm going to speak from a mother's point of view. You need to get to a doctor and do it quick. Why aren't you taking care of business?? You should be on birth control because you are still dating and able to have sex. You shouldn't be drinking at your age and you need to STOP making silly mistakes. Of course this baby is innocent (inisant) but do you feel this baby deserves to be cheated out of life. This baby will not be given a fair chance. I'm not saying abort the baby nor give the baby up for adoption, i'm just saying for once in your life step back and think about your life and where its headed. You have 1 mistake thats not going anywhere till its 18 do you really need another. Personally I think you don't need a boyfriend. So think about the choices you are making and really examine them to the point that you will actually want to cry and straighten up your life.

Question: If you knew u had sex at that party why didn't you take the Plan B pill?

Answer 8

Well posting something like this is like a target for mean answers because people have different views. The fact that your boyfriend knows that you had sex with another man and is mad because the kid wont be his is kind of stupid.
He has no say so in if the baby lives or not, and abortion isn't the right answer because of a mistake u made.
Everyone makes mistakes but an innocent life shouldn't pay for it. And concidering that you chose to keep your first child, especially so young means that you understand the implictions of sex. It isn't really anybody elses advice that you need to listen to because you need to make that choice on your own.

Answer 9

It ultimately is your choice. You are very young! I totally understand your situation though. I had my son when I was 15, and it was hard. I don't think you are ready for another child, and how will your children's life be? Do you work? Are you in school? You really need to be focusing on the baby you have now, and not out having sex a procreating! I know how hard it is for young mother's but you DON'T need any more kids. If not for you then for the sake of your baby. If you can't have an abortion, which I understand then why not look into adoption. I think it would probably be a good option for you at this point. Think about your children, and not you or how you will feel for once!

Answer 10

Hon........you been through one pregnancy. You know how hard it is and how extreemly wonderful it is. You know the joy and the challenges.

Now that you have given birth you can't imagine an abortion. They are tough to go through. I am strange becasue I am pro choice and pro life.

Ultimatly it is up to you of what you do. I want to tell you two things.

First of all I have given birth twice and it is incredable. My boys are raised and grown ups. I adopted my daughter between the two boys. She was 10 days old when she was put in my arms and to me it was a joyful as giving birth. She is a child of my heart. She is a young adult and she is my best friend and my daughter.

What I want to tell you is that if you give up this baby for adoption you will make a childless couple very happy. You will give your child a chance at a good life. My brother and wife have two adopted boys and they are part of us, they are ours to love forever.

If you feel that you can't raise another child, adoption is a viable option.

You can also choose to have the next baby. And tell your mom that you have learned your lesson and step back and let her be mad and upset because you know she will be. Then once the dust has settled sit down with her and have a grown up conversation with her. Grown up behavoir (sex) means you need to take the grown up consquences. You know that already.
I sense that you are a dear and loving mom to your child.

You have mentioned not knowing if you could deal with aboution. Hon, it will be worse if you do it. There are people who can deal with that. I can't judge one way or another.
As a nurse I have met way too many people both men and women who carry the scars of the abortion with them the rest of their lives. I have a man friend who has two grown up daughters. When he was in high school he gave his girlfriend money to have an abortion. To this day 50 years later he feels that baby was his only son and he hurts from the loss.

I believe you have the heart that couldnt' deal with it.
So, now your two choices are to raise the child or give it to adoption. There are groups of people who connect birth mothers and adoptive parents. It is to me the grandest love that any woman can give. It is easy to give birth and wing ways to be a mother. But, it is an amazing thing to give a baby the chance to have a life and a chance to be all that they can be.

You have a great deal of thinking to do. You have a child that you love. You know what it means to be a mother. You have matured quicker than other girls who haven't been a mother yet. You know. You can do this. You can make a choice.

The baby's life is in God's hands. Who knows you could have a miscarrage and that soul will go to heaven. Or you will carry the baby becasue it is meant to be on this earth. You do have control over what you do. Pray and think on it. You don't have to make the decision right away. I used to be an OB/Newborn Nursery Nurse.I have worked with single moms who have kept their baby and those who haven't.

There is no right answer here.

It is YOUR decision. I put my trust in your decision. It won't be easy, but you can do it. Take a pregnancy test soon, so you can either make plans or be relieved that it isn't a pregnancy.

Feel free to email me if you need someone to talk to.
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Answer 11

I personally don't believe in abortion, I was adopted and I've always felt that if you can't take care of your child, adoption is the route to go. There are so many people out there who can't have children that would love to adopt a baby. Ultimately the choice will be yours and no one can tell you what to do. If your mom is supportive of you, maybe you should talk to her. If you decide to keep the child, keep in mind that it is like a full-time job in it of itself, let alone going to school. It would be a tough road but it can be done. Good luck in your decision!