I have been seeing this guy since December,after 3 weeks he went and cheated. I think I was dumb to give him a 2nd chance.
Since I have given him a 2nd chance we have split up twice - he initiated it once andme once. I swear he is an idiot,but the problem is he wants the relationship back that he had in the beginning,and he wants it now and since I cant trust him - hes always in my face and always wanting to be coddled like a 2 year old..He is going no wheres in life because he has no ambitions - me on the other hand - I have a lot of ambitions,but I feel like he is bogging me down. We cant have a normal discussion - he always repeats himself - and when he doesnt get his way - he sulks and will sulk in a corner and talk to himself. he wants to go to counceling and I refuse because my theory is if we need counceling this early in the relationship,then there are serious issues and shouldnt be a relationship.His family sees the same thing I do..I am 4 1/2 months pregnant,but not by him
2007-05-16 06:25:19 · 38 answers · asked by country_girl 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
why are you even bothering with such a high maintenance guy?!?!?!
2007-05-16 06:28:35 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your 4 1/2 months pregnant with some other guys child, he's cheating on you after 3 weeks of what you call a relationship and you want help here on Yahoo? Wow, people like you are ignorant losers. Sorry to be so blunt.. You wheel your *** around and share it with anyone that smiles at you and your wondering about staying with some loser? Why don't you close you legs once in a while and find a "Real" guy before you give it up.... A real man isn't going to want to be with you, we might want to screw you, but that is it.. Your Trash with a capital T. Your easy and you think its okay to spread like a whore to some guy you don't even like, let alone think he's worth a sh_t. If he's such a loser, then why would you give it up to him??? You have no idea of what a relationship is. Why are you so ignorant, to bring a child into this world when you aren't in a stable relationship with his father....??? Oh yea.... because you have no idea of how to be a woman , a responsible woman.. Your a free whore.. Giving it up to anyone and everyone without the thought of the effects it has on the world.. Oh yea.. I'm sure you'll ask the state to help you.. So well be paying your way... Yea you have ambition to get in line for a handout... You have ambition to be irresponsible and screw anything that smiles at you. Your child is a bastard .... Your screwing a loser and your one too... Pregnant with someother guys child.. Wow, where do people like you come from... No man is going to want you now.... No "Real" man wants a woman like you....
2007-05-16 06:53:41 · answer #2 · answered by Vindicatedfather 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, ok... here were the tip offs for me:
after 3 weeks he went and cheated
I think I was dumb to give him a 2nd chance
I swear he is an idiot
I cant trust him
He is going no wheres in life because he has no ambitions
he wants to go to counceling and I refuse
...and finally...
I am 4 1/2 months pregnant,but not by him
Why are you with this guy? All you need to do is re-read your post and you'll have your answer.
2007-05-16 06:29:42 · answer #3 · answered by Winette 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
It's not his child and you certainly do not need to add another to your life that is old enough not to be one. I would run from that guy asap. You said it yourself, you have lots of ambitions, he has none. My 2nd ex was like that too. I waited too long and now I turned 48, w/2 divorces, no kids and had to move in with my mom to take care of her. (which was a good thing because i'm all she has left and vise versa)but my point is, if you can see so clearly now how he is, he isn't gonna change. That's what I wasted so much time on....He kept saying he would. It doesn't happen and the older these types get, the more set in their ways they are. Don't tie yourself down with more than the baby....that'll be hard enough on you.
2007-05-16 06:34:43 · answer #4 · answered by Kelly773 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He has lied and cheated. The only thing left in your relationship now is your love. Some time ago I believed that Love was enough. I went through a heck of alot to learn that Love is just the tip of it. You see, a relationship demands partnership. He has shown his loyalty lies within himself. Which is actually great but not when your in a relationship. Really the best thing to do is seperate from this man. He needs counselling for himself, not as a couple. His problems existed before your relationship. And in order for him to properly love you, take care of you and be trustworthy. He must properly love himself, take care of himself and be true to himself. Being together will only allow for him to put some of the problems off on you. And we all know you didn't cause him to cheat. We all know that he brought all these problems on himself. So he himself needs to get counselling. Counselling in itself will show that he is committed to change. Agreeing that he has problems and is willing to fix them. You know already that he is the anchor holding you down. You know that this man lacks honesty and loyalty. Your baby will be hear quickly. Imagine how tolerable he will be when he has to compete with an infant for your affection. I doubt it will get any better. You know what he's not right for you, but the feelings are still there. I say that if you truly care for this man you will let him go so that he can seek the proper help he needs. Someday down the road he could end up being the perfect man for you. But now, you already have too much on your plate with a new baby coming (Congratulations by the way). So please concentrate on you and the baby as he is too consumed with himself to even realize that your overall health is very important while carrying your baby. Good Luck & God Bless!
2007-05-16 06:55:18 · answer #5 · answered by mellowblues 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Obviously you are not married, so you don't need marriage counseling. If you've only been seeing this guy since December you can't possibly believe that the relationship is so long term that you need to hold on to what is left. He may have cheated, but if you are pregnant and the baby isn't his, well, that says that maybe you did a little cheating too. It sounds like you already decided that you don't want him and you already decided that you want to end the relationship. So, quoting from an old movie favorite of mine, "Tinkle or get off the pot!"
2007-05-16 06:41:49 · answer #6 · answered by Manda B 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Save yourself a few misreable years and take your own adivce: Drop him!! It may take a little time to heal but believe me it's not worth trying to fix someone. He already shows signs of being needy, if you are about to become a mother there is no way your going to have the time and energy to take care of two babies!! I do feel like you should stay friends though he may be forced to grow up if he knows that is his only chance of ever being with you. As for the cheating thing I am a firm believer men cheat because they want to and are given the chance so if he is given the same chance in the future chances are he'll take it unless he truly knows what he is going to lose by taking the chance.
2007-05-16 06:31:05 · answer #7 · answered by cutie_pie28 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
And your question is what? Give your head a shake girl!..
You have a baby on the way and a life to get together, let him go sulk in a corner and get on with your life, without him...
He's cheated, he's immature and he's an idiot, what is there to think about here?
Be grateful he's not the father of this child..
Now get your **** together and make a life for you and that baby....
2007-05-16 06:31:21 · answer #8 · answered by Innisfil g 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hi
i think if you are having problems this long into the relationship you shouldnt take it any further. You dont need the stress of that when you have a baby on the way and when the baby comes do you really want to be arguing around him/her???
It wouldn't be fair on any of you. I would walk away - maybe very difficult but i think its for the best you and your baby should come first not this man! He will take up to much time that you should spend with your baby,
Hope this helps!
2007-05-16 06:33:03 · answer #9 · answered by *music* 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you have already answered your question for yourself. The trust is questionable and lack of ambition are some serious indicators of a miserable relationship. Listen to yourself and cut the ties early. You do not need the emotional rollercoaster dragging you down. Good luck to you and your new baby!
2007-05-16 06:30:53 · answer #10 · answered by jesenuf2u 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Break up with him - fast - and run, don't walk away. Don't look back. He can't be trusted and he IS bogging you down. The only thing that surprises me is that you need help making this decision. The fact that you're pregnant complicates the situation but don't add to your mistakes by prolonging a dead-end relationship with a loser.
2007-05-16 06:30:13 · answer #11 · answered by OzarkMtnLady 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋