Why is life so hard...?

Question

My girlfriend is pregnant with my child and she is having an abortion against my wishes. We have been living together for six months and supposedly love eachother yet she is breaking up with me and moving out becuase of this. She tells me she isn't in love with me and cannot have my child. I've been sober two years today...my biological bithday is June 2...about the time she will abort...I just don't get it

Answer 1

Life is partly what we make it, and partly circumstance. This part is circumstance. Everything that happens in life is for a reason, and most of the time that reason is to teach us something. You cannot control her, and I understand this pain you must feel. I've been through a lot of really bad things in life too. Congratulations on your sobriety. Do NOT let this set you back. This is a test to see how Jeff handles adversity. Will it send you three steps backwards? All you can do is keep living a good life....and she will have to answer for the choice she's making right now. I think you're better off finding this out now, then when you have three children, a lot of bills, and a lot of history with a person who wasn't what you thought she was. I know it doesn't seem like it now. Hang tough. You will get through this, and you will be a better person. Try to find the lesson in this. It might take a while to see what it was supposed to teach you, but whatever you do...keep moving forward...NOT backwards. Good luck to you.

Answer 2

Yes you do. You put your girlfriend in a position that she really doesnt want to be, pregnant and not married. Shes probably breaking up with you because you wont stand behind her on her decision. For whatever reason she doesnt want the child so you basically have to go along with her wishes. Not sure what the sober part has to do with anything unless it was a prior problem in your relationship and now shes just tired of being with you and just plain want out and the baby is just bad timing at this point. It may be the pregnancy thats talking when she says she doesnt love you anymore but it doest matter now. All you can do now is talk to her andsee if you can change hr mind if you really want the child. Its a big responsibilty especially in a troubled relationship so think long and hard about it. Good luck

Answer 3

She may be feeling as upside down as you are right now. Set up as relaxing of a time to talk to her and ask her why she can't have your child other than the reason of her supposedly not loving you. Is she afraid she can not care for it or just doesn't want to? Maybe if you find the reasons for it you can then try to come up with a resolution. If she absolutely refuses to budge, then I'm sorry to say there really is nothing you can do. Though you should have a say as the father, it is her choice with her body, you can't physically stop her from getting it done, if she is that set to it she will find a way. I am so sorry you have to go through this but please don't let it set you back. Just do EVERYTHING possible in your power to try to find an alternative, if one can't be reached then at least you know that you didn't just sit back and let it happen, that you did try but trying doesn't always lead to success or the desired outcome and eventually you will have to accept it whether you agree with it or not. It will be hard, speaking from experience, please just try. Keep up the good work, there are other ways to distract yourself other than drugs/alcohol which don't help in situations as these. Congrats on the sobriety, I hope to do the same eventually. Do all in your power you can and good luck either way it goes, keep up the sobriety.

Answer 4

Gosh, that really is a hard life. I live on an island where the indians get pregnant at 14 because they don't know any better, they dig through the garbage dump to get what little they can out of there, mostly soft drink cans for a few pennies a day income. Most are malnourished. Children die all the time. Grandparents are raising their grandchildren because both of the parents died. They live in thatched roof huts at best, some times under a lean-to. They don't worry about "getting sober" since they have a tough time getting clean water. Gosh you really do have a hard life.

Answer 5

omg, to abort is a big sin , but what can u do she wants to be a sinner, yes life is hard sometimes but , this is only a test , dont lose hope , there are always , brigth tommorow that will come , save ur child, now if u cant do ,then leave to god , and god will make a way ,there are more better woman that willing to give u a child , if she doesnt want u , then go and find a another the better 1

Answer 6

The late Beatle - John Lennon - is reputed to have said, "Life is what happens to you, when you are making other plans."
I think you should pray a lot.
If it goes the wrong way - and you have no legal rights in this because of US Supreme Court decisions - then realize you had a narrow escape. Is this the woman that you want deciding whether to turn off the life support for you after the auto accident?
There are plenty of fish in the sea, but if it goes the wrong way, you must lose her. She can never respect you again, if she ever did.

Answer 7

Time to re-evaluate your life...and going back to a bottle will not help. Go to AA everyday..don't skip one of them. Be glad that she is honest with you. Can you imagine living with someone the rest of your life that doesn't love you??? Not a good thought.
Believe it or not, you will get over her and find real love...the world is filled with lonely women who are dying to get out, have fun, and fall in love. You have seen the down side of love, and that makes you a wiser and stronger person. Keep your eyes wide open in the journey.
Accept what you cannot change. good luck

Answer 8

Hang in there. Obviously if this woman is making such a huge decision without your consent, she was not the woman you should have been with. It's going to be hell getting through it, but just remember that you'll not have to live the rest of your life with the woman she has ended up being. You were probably in love with who you thought she was, not who she actually was.

Answer 9

Why weren't you guys using protection? That's the issue. It's sad that this is happening, but this is the way it is when you're living carelessly. Next time, be wise enough to use protection.

BTW: Let this girl go and get on with your life. She's not worth the hassle.

Answer 10

Have you asked her to carry the child so that you can raise it by yourself? You don't need her and FYI women think single dad's are hot. Plus I am pretty sure that you could get a court injunction to stop her aborting a fetus you want.