We live together and before this week he was perfect. Happy, funny, in love. Everything was literally heaven. We were planning on an engagement in a few months and have already kind of started planning.
Now all of a sudden, meaning starting monday, hes been mean! Monday we got in a big crying fight and it ended with us saying how much we loved each other and as far as I could tell, the fight was completely over and we were all good. So then, yesterday he comes home and is just 'grumpy'. Theres no other word for it really. He is being careless with things, throwing them down. I said "I love you more than anything" in bed and he said "yeah I can tell" or when he got back into bed from peeing in the middle of the night i went in to kiss him and he yelled "Can I at least get comfortable???" When we were watching a movie there was a spider on the wall and I was like "ew! Kill it!" and he rolled his eyes and murmered about pathetic girls who are afraid of spiders....
2007-05-16 03:20:35 · 20 answers · asked by spamber 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Is there an explanation to this? Do you think hes just in a bad mood? Should I see if it passes? Im so hurt and confused right now. I put this in the marriage section because Im an adult with a serious problem here. Its not considered 'dating' to me and the people in the dating area seem to be all 15 years old.
Thanks.
2007-05-16 03:22:28 · update #1
I think he may be either
1) getting nervous about commitment
or
2) hooking up with someone else and feeling guilty, thus trying to get you to kick him out and not have to be the bad guy.
sorry!
2007-05-16 03:25:32 · answer #1 · answered by veryniserack 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Maybe living together and getting really serious is all of the sudden a little overwhelming for him. You should sit him down and ask him. Tell him you want to be able to talk about things without fighting. Maybe you need some time apart. You could pick a day or two out of the week that you go out with girlfriends and do something fun and can get a little space.
2007-05-16 03:26:20 · answer #2 · answered by Abs 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Ask him what's the matter. He may be under stress from school/work/other obligations. If he says "nothing." then drop it. But be watchful.
And look for your own place because it sounds like he's outgrowing the relationship at a rapid pace. And for good reason: I hate to be mean sounding, but from your post it seems as though you cling, you demand, you cry - things that men can't stand - especially men who are already outgrowing a relationship.
Again, look for your own place. Both of you need to do some more maturing.
Don't threaten to look for your own place - GET your own place and move out. No warning, no tears, no drama. Just take your stuff and go. He'll wonder what happened and then you can tell him how distant, grumpy and negligent he was of you and you've moved on.
It's not a bad thing - but it is painful and scary - but believe me, in a year or so's time, you'll wonder what you ever saw in "Grumpy" in the first place.
2007-05-16 03:46:04 · answer #3 · answered by Barbara B 7 · 0⤊ 3⤋
There might be something that is bothering him that has nothing to do with you. It could be a situation at work that he is not telling you about or a fight between him and a friend of his. He probably is just taking his anger and frustration out on you because you are there. I would give him some space and give him a couple of days to "cool" off and then approach him about it. Sit him down and let him know that you are there to listen if he needed to talk about anything. I would see if he needed to get anything off of his chest before you confronted him with the way he has been treating you. When you do approach him about it, don't come at him like it is all his fault. Make sure you use "I" statements like "I was really upset when you did...." instead of "You upset me" Hope everything works out for you.
2007-05-16 03:36:03 · answer #4 · answered by Waiting on Bennett Cole 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Sounds like he wants out all of a sudden and that can be from many reasons. Move out and seperate from him and if he still wants to date. Date him but just the rules and see what happens.
In the future don't sleep with a guy before marriage and certainly don't live with them first.
As the old saying goes Why buy the cow when you can have the milk for free?
2007-05-16 03:25:03 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
It sounds like he's not sure if he loves you enough to marry you try not to be so clingy give him a little space and see if his attitude changes... or he may have a big secret he could have someone on the side you can never be to sure every one who has been cheated on thought it could never happen.
2007-05-16 03:36:24 · answer #6 · answered by bluemist 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
sounds like it one of two things one of them which i hope is the answer because its easier to fix is he feels like he is losing who he is it becoming no longer him and you but we every thing becomes a we factor not a me factor which guys dont tend to like to give up easily second thing it could be is he no longer wants to be together any more the best way to figure any thing out is sit down no distractions and talk about how his words are making you feel and why he says these hurtful things good luck
2007-05-16 03:30:01 · answer #7 · answered by geminitrubl 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Guys act like this when they're unhappy, rather than actually sit and talk about things, they get grumpy (take it from one). Anyway, he could just be lamenting his dying bachelorhood. Don't nag at him, just tell him you love him, but you know he's unhappy, and that if he wants to wait on the engagement, then you all need to talk about it....
2007-05-16 03:25:26 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
Yes, It will probably pass. Men go through these moods just like women do, Its like their period without the blood. Give it a few days
2007-05-16 03:25:08 · answer #9 · answered by osu_fanz 4 · 4⤊ 1⤋
I'd wait it out a few days, then tell him you don't understand why he;s been acting so weird lately. He probably in freak out mode over the engagement, etc...
2007-05-16 03:28:07 · answer #10 · answered by melouofs 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋