I have everything, a good house, a son, a loving husband but whn i met a person 5 yrs ago it seemed to me that now i am living. He is my soul mate. He got engaged recently which has made me terrible i hv lost my connection with life i am lifeless.jst doing my duties day in and day out and cry everytime no one is looking. i know i shld concentrate on my home my family and other people around me and i was doing also but now nothing seem to work. i hv stopped communicating with the person but its killing me. HELP
2007-05-16 00:52:38 · 8 answers · asked by rimzhim 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
I know exactly how you feel as I'm in the same boat. I'm happily married and my 1st true love has made contact again. I still have feelings for him, he makes me feel alive. I love him and he loves me and neither of us wants to hurt anyone. What do we do but suffer in silence. If you cannot be with each other then take the second best thing and stay in contact that way you will get your silent feed of being alive and happy. Don't get into a physical relationship with him unless you are both prepared to destroy peoples lives.
2007-05-16 01:01:07 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
Its hard to know all the details about this situation because you haven't said much in regards to how involved you were, if at all, with this person.
However from what you have said i think that you being extremely over the top and dramatic about the whole situation....
Firstly, i'm going to be really honest with you..... you need to grow up!... you have a son to look after as well as the fact that you're MARRIED and your loving husband deserves to be with someone who wants to be with him.
How would you feel, if the tables were turned? What if it was him who thought someone else was his "soul mate"?
The truth is that this other person is engaged and obviously in love with someone else, the whole "soul mate" thing, i believe you've created in your mind, it's obviously not mutual.
What's the REAL reason that you have choosen to believe that this other person is your soul mate?
Because i believe it's more to do with your dissatisfaction with your marriage and your life and you may have been using this other person as an escape from reality.
You need to face what the real issue here is.....
Why would you choose to feel So much for someone who isn't yours?....
At the end of the day you chose to get married and to have a child and you have responsibilties, if you are not happy with your marriage work on that, don't go looking for outside things or people to compensate.
Chi Chi x.
2007-05-16 08:41:02 · answer #2 · answered by Chi Chi 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have been there it's not that he is your soul mate it's that you loved the messing around. You loved the excitement of it all the new feeling. some ppl go though this after they get married they think that they have made a miss take because they have lost the excitement of sex and going out but it's not that they have lost it it's that they want get in trouble if they are found out or that they don't have to sneak around anymore. So i I think it your case it's not that he is your soul mate it's that you liked the sneaking around and the new of it all. So you don't miss him as much as you miss the excitement and the feeling that someone one wanted you. Trust me it will pass you need to sit your husband down and tell him that you feel like your marriage is in a rut and that you need some excitement in you marriage. Tell him how you feel with out telling him everything that you have done and if it is ment to be you will work it out with your husband and if not you will find someone El's or you might even be with the one you think is your soul mate. But don't give up on your family just yet. I have been there if you talk to your husband it will help. Hope thing work out.......
2007-05-16 08:35:42 · answer #3 · answered by Hollie D 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
every rose has its thorn it just seems this one cut a little deeper than most,
you've so much in life to look forward to, like your son growing up, i suggest taking a walk around your room
look at all the little things like the jewelry box is a good place to start, look at each piece and try to remember where it came from how you felt when you were given it/bought it then move from the room to the rest of the house
you'll find yourself remembering so much about your life and barely a fraction will be because of the other guy you'll remember felings you've almost forgotten and after you can sit with your husband, curl up on the sofa and reminis about your life together how you first met, how you first realised you were in love i bet you'll smile together.
the heart heals a little each day and let it be through your husband and the memories you have and the memories you've yet to make
2007-05-16 08:52:53 · answer #4 · answered by Kalina 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
honey...well, i'm not being rude. but you really have to get over it. he has moved on and you need to too.
...start doing things. get someone to baby sit your child and go out with some friends just to get things off of your mind. than start having some precious family time..with all of you.
the fact is, well your son needs you. and that's that. you need to stop...take him to the park on a picnic..to the movies. just keep on the move and you will do fine. do it as a family thing.
if you can't than i think it is best that you go and see someone professionally and talk to them. you haveto get out of the way you are feeling. your son is depending on you.
**killing yourself is the easy way out. and life isn't meant to be easy love. just get over it and move on, you have a bloody husband.. you have to stop what you are doing. you left that life a long time ago. it will be affecting your son...not just you and you don't want that trust me. and your poor husband
everybody gets hurt mate...you learn from it, it's a part of life. no need to end your life because of it. you've got a good life up ahead.
just keep looking forward...NEVER look back!!!
2007-05-16 08:16:56 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think if it's like that then it wasn't meant to be. i bet if you could count your blessings they would very much outweight all the bad stuff. i think that your son & husband are worth being happy for and worth living life for. i think that maybe if you do talk to ur "soul mate" it'll just bring all the unessesary feelings. you should find something new to do...like a class...an activity, anything to get your mind off your so-called 'soulmate'.
2007-05-16 08:00:37 · answer #6 · answered by islandgirl 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i guess u shudn't stop communicating with any1........life isn't a bed of roses.......instead, increase ur communication with ur son..........personally i feel tht children can cure any depression.......believe me nd u'll get a reason to live. thn ppl also say tht cooking is d best receipe for healing....give it a try nd just liv 4 d present not by d past......cheer up.......my best wishes
2007-05-16 08:02:23 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
for God's sake, move on, this guy isnt your "soul mate" there is NO SUCH THING! just because you want him doesnt mean he is for you...
why arent you happy with what you have????
2007-05-16 07:56:27 · answer #8 · answered by bronzebabekentucky 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋