I would like to know, if you are a naturally friendly person who always have a kind and soft heart since small but throughout your life you continue to experience betrayal, abuse, discrimination, cheated, distrusted, etc by 9 out of 10 people you met, what stance you'll take to continue to survive?
I am a religious and spiritual person, but I will take the dark side for self-defence. I have learnt to be ruthless, selfish and distrust others in order to survive. What about you?
2007-05-15 23:47:50 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Arts & Humanities ➔ Philosophy
Now, I no longer subscribe to holy stuff. All I know is that even negative thoughts can create power, not just positive thoughts. And all I do is only for what is necessary.
2007-05-16 00:02:05 · update #1
Butterfly - experience showed me the dark side might be the only salvation. No, I don't need help. I only need power.
2007-05-16 00:40:18 · update #2
I have to admit the dark side is hurtful at times. But in other times, it is satisfying. There is simply no other way that is more satisfying than hatred. Besides, only hatred can bring out pure ruthlessness. If we stay soft, we will surely be squashed in no time.
2007-05-16 03:47:28 · update #3
We create the reality that we live in by our interpretation of the situations that we are confronted with and our responses to them.
People are all neutral, we give their actions all of the meaning that they have to us.
Your decision to be like them and take the dark side is a cop out. You could just as easily decide to treat them with loving kindness.
This might eventually create a loving response from them. No matter what your decision to respond in kind, just adds one more negative person to the mix.
I suggest that you rethink your strategy for dealing with these types of people. Nothing is gained by your current method of dealing with the people that you have labeled.
True power comes from ignoring the unloving actions that we are confronted with, and responding in a loving and inclusive manner.
Anything else comes from fear, and fear is a sign of weakness.
love and blessings Don
2007-05-16 02:33:19 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
How truly hurt you must be, to feel as you do. I feel so sorry for you. I do understand why you have become so self protective but surely you realise that it is no way to live?
Have you ever had anyone to talk too about how you feel? I was like you to a degree, for my own protection but as I have learned to trust Jesus He has shown me that He is the only one that can truly be trusted but at the same time He has led me to let people into my life because we need each other, forgiveness is the only way to set yourself free from all this pain you are feeling in your heart but forgiveness is not saying that what ever happened to you is OK, it is just releasing yourself from the hurts of the past so that you can heal and move on to enjoy a better life.......Love is the answer here, not hurt and pain and rejection or power, it only leaves you empty, and I believe that you know this otherwise you wouldn't be here asking this question, God still loves you my friend and He is waiting for you to turn back to Him, as always, it is your choice because God blessed us all with free will.
2007-05-20 05:52:44 · answer #2 · answered by karina p 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I try to be a kind caring person. People take advantage you easily when are this way. When I lived in Florida we lived in a small community, and I didn't experience people's negative and deceptive ways. But when I moved to Tennessee it's a whole different place. At first the people are warm to you and welcome you, then you learn how they really are. I hate to admit it but I only know a hand full of people that is not out to get something from me or use me. I have been used and hurt here so much that it is turning me colder towards people. That I hate because it's not me. But I have taught my children to not trust right away wait them out and see how they expose themselves. I know people is like this everywhere, I just wasn't expose till I moved here, where I live now.
It does take a toll on my spiritual side of me. I sometimes judge others when I shouldn't. So now i use my intuition, to figure people out.
2007-05-16 07:54:10 · answer #3 · answered by norielorie 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Alright. You want power. Over what? To do what?
May be you are just putting on as a tough person, while laughing internally.
All feelings of betrayal, abuse, discrimination, being cheated and distrusted are matters of the ego. If we learn to let go of the ego most of these vanish.
That is what I try to do. Set aside the ego. I guess that it is easier when you are 68.
2007-05-16 08:12:24 · answer #4 · answered by A.V.R. 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Learn from the choices that you did make.
You are not responsible for what others do, or for what they have done to you. The part that you do have control over is deliberate on what made you choose to allow those people into your life.
What signs did you not see? What signs there, but you chose to ignore. Why didn't you end the relationship earlier before the harm could take place?
These are things that we can review to minimize the effect of harmful people in our life.
Of course, my strategy is never to personalize what others might do to me. That's about them. It has nothing to do with me. If someone is abusive towards me, that person has an issue in dealing with people and their own emotions.
2007-05-16 10:27:24 · answer #5 · answered by guru 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i will try to treat people they way they treat me which means i'll try to be rude, selfish, ME and ME then come the others, distrust others, try to depend only on myself, try to be fake so i can live with those people n cope with this life...but this is not easy to do if u r naturally spontaneous and with a kind heart...and when u try to be rude n selfish with others u will always feel bad cuz u're not acting yourself, u're acting someone else...
y u're not allowing anyone to send u an email???
2007-05-16 07:24:09 · answer #6 · answered by ^Butterfly^ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would continue to believe in people i may be hurt but I just could not stoop to the level of the cruel and unkind people.It would make me just as bad as the ones who hurt me,and that would not be good for my soul
2007-05-16 06:57:23 · answer #7 · answered by shawns bonnie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have been in the same boat as you, and so are many others probably. It is a way the fittest will survive. I basically focus on my own self, live my own life and continue to live it avoiding to harm others while they have harmed me. avenging myself in any way, will lead me nowhere in this cruel world.
2007-05-16 08:02:40 · answer #8 · answered by oscar c 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's only one thing you can be sure of, you can control your own thoughts and actions....you can't control others. Your wary eye will be looking for that 1 out 10th person you can trust....the others will be side-shows on your life's journey.
2007-05-18 05:37:00 · answer #9 · answered by Its not me Its u 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is no alternative but to harden oneself to face the ever growing attacks from other people and external environment.
2007-05-16 07:07:56 · answer #10 · answered by small 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋