My friend obsesses over her friends' weights.?

Question

She's really a good friend if you put this aside, but constantly she makes rude comments about how heavy her friends are. For example, yesterday she told me that "those pants you borrowed from me fit you.. once you finally got them on!" She's so overly confident about herself that she just puts her friends down without realizing that maybe it hurts them sometimes. She herself is somewhat skinny, but deffinatly growing bigger because her "metabolism is amazing.. i can eat an entire pizza and not gain a pound!!" trust me, she tells me that EVERY DAY!!
Me and my other friends have done everything we can to stop her from making these remarks, but she won't change!! We've talked to her, written letters, walked away every time she says something mean, but she doesnt understand how hurtful her comments make us. We've told her how much she hurts us constantly, but she won't change.
She's a really good friend aside from this, though. How can I get to respect others?

Answer 1

I think she dose it cause she may have low self eseteem and if she is putting you and your other friends down it makes her feel better. I would talk to your other friends and the next time she makes a comment like that just get up and all walk away. to show her that you ladies are not putting up with it anymore. She has to change her ways or loose you guys as friends. It will be hard but don't talk to her until she says she is sorry. and makes an effort to change.

Good luck

Answer 2

She is not overly confident about herself, in fact she is probably suffering from very low self esteem. Many people are like her and avoid looking at their own shortcomings by focusing on other people's problems. What you need to do is find out what she is so insecure about in herself and get her to talk about it. If I am wrong and she doesn't have some personal issue that she is masking by making you and her other friends feel bad... well, then she is just not a good person and is not worthy of your friendship. Friends should lift you up, not bring you down.

Answer 3

You cant get her to do anything. You can only control what you do, not anyone else.

You can suggest to her to be more aware of her words she choses to use. Let her know how her words affect you and your friends. Let the emotions her inconsiderate words cause stay out of the conversation for a successful conversation. Anyways, she probably is afraid of gaining weight and expresses it towards you guys by making her comments. Maybe these comments are a way for her to deal with her own fears of being fat. or heavy. Somewhere she is getting fed that her beauty is on the outside.

Answer 4

If she can't respect you, she isn't a very good friend, you should tell her that if she doesn't stop her hurtful behavior that she is putting your friendship on the line, and if she continues, obviously your friendship isn't that important to her and you need to leave the friendship.

Answer 5

It sounds like she doesn't care that she hurts other people's feelings. All you can do is stop talking to her for a while and see if she changes.

Answer 6

If you told her how you felt and she never stopped, then maybe she is not the kind of friend you need. Friends are suppose to make you feel better about yourself. I don't think she is a true friend.

Answer 7

Doesn't sound like much of a friend to me.

I'd find someone else to spend my time with.

Answer 8

Sounds like shes in competition with you. Aren't all girls that way?

Answer 9

she is conceited. tell her to shut up about weight. she's obsessive.