I mean I have gone through 25 years of three daughters (two now grown) and one sweet dear son (they are 89% easier) ((i made that up)) and two Husband's, going on 19 year's w/hubby #2 and we have gone through what two people can DO TO EACH other, cheat, lie and purposely hurt one another. But still in love and attracted to each other (5 day's a week @ 43 I'm doing somthing right) but still the work. are we working for zip???
2007-05-15 11:55:07 · 12 answers · asked by Deb S 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
not working too hard on the marriage if you have both cheated, lied and purposely hurt one another.....that is SAD that the two of you have lived like that.
2007-05-15 11:58:23 · answer #1 · answered by abc 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Relationships are always going to be work. Sounds silly but comparing it to a garden, you can't just plant it and let it go and hope that everything will turn out perfect and even with the tenderest of care things will sometimes not work out the way you planned. Love takes care and concern and as people we seek these relationships but yet sometimes have a hard time putting in the work that goes into maintaining them. If after all you two have done to each other (which doesn't really show how much you care) you still love and adore each other then the two of you must be very forgiving people. maybe if you would stop hurting each other (purposely or not) then things would be extremely different. If you love one another so much I would think you would stop all the foolishness of doing things that could potentially lead to the demise of your long standing marriage.
2007-05-15 19:29:20 · answer #2 · answered by superwmn315 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think I hear what your saying, I have found that if you do right , right will be done back to you...it sounds like you've had more downs then ups and with those comes heartache...we all need to make better choices to enjoy life day to day...not one day it will all come together...it should be everyday something should be enjoyed or at least not cause any heartache or hardship. When you have a partner it can become a challenge to enjoy the simple things if you partner or children are not on the same level nor on the same path as yourself...I have had a blessed life, not all roses...a few thorns here and there but always with a beautiful outlook..
2007-05-15 19:20:33 · answer #3 · answered by Goodspeed 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Marriage is more than just enjoying life ... that is why it is so very hard to do. Marriage is a sacrament that joins together not only two people, but two souls. Each one helps the other to become better, to grow, to improve, and to be drawn closer to God. It is easier not to grow, not to move toward God, and not to look at marriage as a sacrament. It is also easy to see all of the remaining efforts of being married as amounting to nothing. If it does not draw you both closer to God, then it isn't working the way that it should be working.
But you know ... it's not too late. Physical attraction is wonderful, but joining your souls in marriage ... I guarantee that will make it worth ALL of the effort.
I hope this helps you. Take care and be well.
Greg
2007-05-15 19:12:49 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Life is what you make it.
You have made it hard by not putting in the daily effort it takes to keep a good marriage going.
No one said raising children was easy, in fact if they do they have probably never spent more than 30 minutes with a child by themselves. If you dont want children, dont have them. You must have heard they were hard work...and you have FOUR!
2007-05-15 18:59:07 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with the answer that ,Life is what you make
it. I started working when I was 15yrs old paying
social security, quit when I was 46, getting a re-
tirement check, and waiting on my social security,
married, raised kids, and now me and my wife
who also helped raise the kids and worked are
reaping the benefits of life itself., here in the
tropical paradise in Panama.
2007-05-15 23:18:28 · answer #6 · answered by RudiA 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Marriage and children are a ton of work.
The "they lived happily ever after" thing doesn't apply outside the pages of fairy tales.
Keep writing the pages of your story, but it sounds more like a soap opera than a fairy tale.
Just do your best to make it a happy ending.
Good luck.
2007-05-15 19:01:19 · answer #7 · answered by Mr R 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's one of the rules of life, dear. You must take sh!t on a daily basis, and honor those who dole it out.
2007-05-15 18:59:34 · answer #8 · answered by mixedup 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Life is never easy. It is what you make of it. As for your relationship. You sound remorseful.
2007-05-15 19:04:53 · answer #9 · answered by bountyhunter101 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
HOW CAN BOTH OF U CONTINUE LIVING A LIFE FULL OF LIES? REMEMBER THAT U HAVE KIDS AND KIDS LEARN WHAT THEY SEE THEIR PARENTS DO AND SAY. WATCH OUT AND GOOD LUCK.
2007-05-15 19:09:08 · answer #10 · answered by CONFUSED 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋