i am scared to tell this to my wife about all this .iam sure she will forgive me.but she will have a doubt for me in future.and not only that everytime when i will fought with her she will take this matter out. please advice what is the best.
2007-05-15 07:03:58 · 31 answers · asked by pirsa363 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
DO NOT TELL.As a women, i do not think it is something that pleasant.Just ask yourself,what if your wife tell you that she having sex with other guys before you...can you accept it?
2007-05-15 07:10:01 · answer #1 · answered by hasienda 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
No, it is not even a good idea. You may tell her you dated x amount of people etc. but don't go into sex details. I have been married twice.
This exact type of discussion caused problems in our marriage. I discussed this with a social therapist once, and she said it only causes problems if you talk about previous sex partners. So in my second, very successful marriage, we agreed not to discuss intimate details of our previous relationships. Saying you dated a few people, and got were close to a few people is ok. I wouldn't even bring up the subject. If it comes up, just say that you don't believe this discussion would enrich our relationship.
2007-05-15 07:12:42 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why put this burden on her? Why do you feel the need to cleanse and purge yourself at the expense of hurting her? It is never a good idea to share life's experiences that one has had before marrying their significant other. Ignorance is bliss, and if you do that, she will never look at you quite the same again. It will take something away from your relationship that you will not be able to get back. The old saying "loose lips sinks ships" could very well describe what you are about to
do. She didn't know you at the time, so why do you feel the need to be forgiven by her? Forgive yourself for what you did and move on. She probably knows there were other/s. If she hasn't asked you, she doesn't want to know.
2007-05-15 07:08:33 · answer #3 · answered by Sparkles 7 · 1⤊ 2⤋
It is your responsibility to tell your partner about your sexual history BEFORE you have sex with her, or before you marry her, whichever comes first. You don't need to go into details (and out of tact, you really shouldn't), but you should let her know the number of other women you've slept with, and especially any unprotected sex you may have had. You should both be tested for STDs before the marriage (even if you're "100% sure" you're clean), and share the results with each other. She has a right to know if she is being exposed to anything.
As a moral/religious/emotional issue, you need to be honest with her, and she needs to respect that honesty. Tell her what you did, and if you repent it. Reaffirm to her that these women are in your PAST - and she is your FUTURE. If she can't cope with that and forgive you, then you aren't meant to be together. If she brings it up in the future and tries to reproach you, remind her that you told her about it before you got married, and she still married you anyway - if it bothers her that much, she shouldn't have married you.
2007-05-15 07:13:28 · answer #4 · answered by teresathegreat 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Is she asking about it?? You two are married now and if she is asking then you want to be honest in your marriage right? This sounds like something that should of been addressed while you were dating. It's too late now what choice does she have if you tell her. Unless you lied before about how many women you were with then that would have been deceitful. Be honest and tell her the truth but assure her that this was in your past and now she is the only one for you. What did she think you were a virgin before you two met...she can't be that naive not to know there were others before her.
2007-05-15 07:09:34 · answer #5 · answered by babygirl28 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
See whenever I ask my boyfriend about girls he's slept with before me... Im only looking for a fight. Your wife may be like me and a lot of other ladies who will only get jealous. If she brings it up again, just tell her now that the only thing that matters now is she is the only person you want to be with forever and that you wish you lost your virginity to her. Tell her you wish it was just you and her from the start and that you don't think about the women from your past. My boyfriend pulled this line on me and it worked sooo good luck with it.
2007-05-15 07:09:57 · answer #6 · answered by LilMiss143 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Your wife is probably aware that there were other women before you two got married. This is actually the kind of thing you should have talked about when things started to get serious, or before you were intimate, whichever came first.
2007-05-15 07:33:20 · answer #7 · answered by Erin 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
that is not mandatory. there are various religious ideals that say you ought to attend until marriage to have intercourse, in spite of the undeniable fact that it genuinely relies upon on your very own/religious perspectives and that i think cultural. plainly as though a lot of people immediately are having intercourse earlier marriage, so it comes right down to what you have faith and maximum of all what you desire to do.
2016-11-23 14:44:21 · answer #8 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You may but try not to give to much detail. If possible try to avoid giving any information at all. Its true what you just said they will bring it up later in any future arguments. The pass is the pass and it shouldn't matter now.
2007-05-15 07:09:00 · answer #9 · answered by muñeca 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I have never been married but i dont think its a womens right to know about anything that happened in her husbands past i mean come on she had a life before him...which means both persons had a life before each other thus not necessary to bring up anything from the past.
2007-05-15 07:08:22 · answer #10 · answered by *her* 2 · 1⤊ 3⤋