My husband and I have been married for 41/2 years, we dated for 8. He is part owner of a family bussiness and runs the office, for the past 9 months I have been working as his secretary, I was only supposed to work with him until he found someone to be there full time.
We have been fussing a great deal. I know he loves me, and I have learned that his job is very stressful, I'm just wondering if any of you work with your husband/wife, and if you do, how does it affect your relationship?
2007-05-15 06:15:27 · 28 answers · asked by Cresha B 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
My husband and i use to work together when we first got married and i didn't like it at all...
We worked at a call center and we were together 24/7 (( way too much time together)) I mean he had to be sitting by me the whole time at work, he had to take his lunch whenever i had mine ect...
It got tiring, it caused me to become very moody and annoyed and we argued alot..
People need a break from one another, if you see them everyday all day long 24/7 then you will start getting sick of seeing them and that aint a good thing..
Finally i told my husband i did not like working with him, that i needed some space and i quite my job and got a different one and you know we still saw eachother everyday of course but not as much...I work from 8am-4pm and he works from 12:30pm-9:30pm so i have 13 hours a day to myself and by then i can't wait for my hubby to get home;)
It all worked out great, he was not upset, he understood!
2007-05-15 07:14:14 · answer #1 · answered by Kasja 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My husband and I have been married for 27 years and we have worked together in the office, for the last five years of the marriage and it works great for us.
We are part owners, along with six others and because of the relationship that we have, it works great for us.
He comes into the office an hour before I do and when I arrive, it's as if we hadn't seen each other since the day before. I thought it would be difficult seeing him 24/7 but we keep business at the job and home at home, unless an emergency arises. I realize my part. I'm his secretary at the job but his wife at home.
Our jobs are stressful as well and we realize this and we communicate on a level where we are supportive to one another. We keep humor in the relationship to keep it positive with any issues we have. I guess after being married as long as we've been married, we're use to one another all the time.
Good luck...And I hope this helps
2007-05-15 06:27:51 · answer #2 · answered by lwheavenlyangel 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think it can definitely work for some couples. My fiancee is also part owner of his family business and has asked if I would come and work with him for a little while, until he finds another assistant. Problem is, I have a great paying job and really enjoy what I do. Although I'd love to help him out (and spend my days with him), I'm afraid it would hurt our relationship. If you're starting to not get along and this is causing problems, you'd probably be better off working somewhere else. Your husband should understand.
2007-05-15 06:21:09 · answer #3 · answered by crabbyone 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My wife started to work with me two years ago. Before she started with me, we could go weeks or longer without seeing each other, as work took me away from home for what could be long amounts of time. Since she started with me, we have grown much closer and value our relationship much more. Of course, there are times that we can get on each others nerves! Like you we have been married about 4 and a half years, however we knew each other about 12 years before getting married! I hope things smooth out for your relationship and work. I would suggest that you try to talk to your husband about how you feel and suggest getting another secretary. Hope all goes well and I'll keep you in my prayers!!! Good Luck
2007-05-15 06:27:36 · answer #4 · answered by sparkylump 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, we don't work together because we are both disabled, but we are together 24/7. We are best friends and do our best to be accepting and understanding of each other. We share everything and don't really fight at all. I think in your situation, you have to be able to distinguish between your work relationship and your personal relationship and that takes some work. Try to not get upset if he is short with you or doesn't give you alot of attention during the day at work. When you can separate the two relationships you will be much happier and things will work out for you both. Good luck.
2007-05-15 06:40:26 · answer #5 · answered by vanhammer 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
My first wife and I did for about eight years - she was a nurse in the OB department and I was the nursing shift supervisor. It never impacted our relationship - something entirely unrelated to the job ended that relationship. My dentist, who just retired, had as his office manager his own wife - and it worked for them until he retired last year. She manages the office under a new dentist, and is planning to retire shortly and join her husband living a comfortable life and spoiling the grandchildren. Those are the only two such situations I have had direct personal contact with - but like you, I've heard it can be a nightmare. I can't honestly say how one could prevent such a situation from turning out poorly, except to suggest that the couple not rush into a situation they can't quickly back out of gracefully in case it does not turn out as might be hoped. Good luck!
2007-05-15 06:25:15 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
My boyfriend, my Mother and I are all starting a business very soon here...The working relationship can interfere with the personal relationship - if it is allowed to. Each must keep their work & their fortee & not bring business into the personal lives. Respect for each other's position, responsibility and experieince is going to be paramount.
Be sure that work is not discussed between you both on your personal time! It's not easy, but it can be done. Phrases such as "were not on the clock right now, can we discuss this tomorrow morning" and "I know this is important & it's bugging me too, but I don't want to argue about work, I just want to kiss my husband hello and get a hug at the end of my day".
By the way - you CAN allow your personal life to interfere with business - say like leaving him a voicemail to et him know that you didn't wear panties to work that day - etc., etc.. That also helps relieve tension and make it so that business becomes secondary to your marriage without making business unimportant.
2007-05-15 06:24:30 · answer #7 · answered by martiek7 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
The part where you say you have been fussing a great deal. Makes me doubt that it's a good idea for you two to be working together for an extended time. I say that if you want things in your marriage to be good. Try to find a replacement for the job you do.
2007-05-15 06:24:07 · answer #8 · answered by ? 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is of the best interest if both of you work it out together. If you enjoy working there with him then it would be great, but if it is also stressing you out then think twice.
On the other hand you have to take in consideration that your husband's work environment is very stressful, and would you like to lessen it for him at work or at home?
2007-05-15 06:21:37 · answer #9 · answered by SueNa 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My wife and I worked together in a previous job and we got along well working together. It wasn't a job where I was in a position of authority over her, but we got along well working together.
I think husbands and wive's can work well together in a job if they are working at the same place.
Example I can give, is Husband and wife team truck drivers. I know alot of husband and wife teams out there driving.
2007-05-15 06:25:18 · answer #10 · answered by Bryan M 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋