Has anyone ever gone for marriage counseling?

Question

Does it work

Answer 1

Never been but I am a counselor. Whether it works depends on the couple, and the therapist to some degree, and their commitment to make it work. I typically see couples who come in way too late and one partner is ready to go but wants to cushion the blow for their soon to be ex. However, when couples come in early in their difficulties it's easy enough to teach them better communication skills, how to "fight fair" which is somewhat of an oxymoron and how to make their individual goals mesh with the couple goals they need to have to stay together.

Answer 2

I have done marriage counseling. The one thing that I have always told couples is that coming to counseling requires a big commitment to whatever the outcome. It is a great opportunity to allow each partner to speak to the other in a 'safe' environement. Sometimes the reasons for their differences are really amusing and they are able to see that for themselves and reconcile. And sometimes they do not. Often counseling is the first time that each person has heard the other and learned how they really feel. When you say about counseling 'it hasnt worked' you have to realize that there are 2 outcomes possible: they stay together or they dont. Very often couples come to counseling very sure about what they want to do about the marriage - that is pretty hard to change especially if one is not going to work at it. It is very hard to make marriages work that have problems that have built (and usually have been under the surface) for many years. But I am someone who cautions, never say never. Each person working on themselves is important - for the relationship, for its future whatever it may be and for future relationships if that is the direction it goes. It is worthwhile for the couple - they owe it to themselves after all the time they have invested - they did love one another at one point - what happened...

Answer 3

I would say that generally, if it was meant to be, you can repair it sometimes. If it wasn't meant to be, the therapy will most likely be a waste of money, but not a waste of time. I believe marriage counselors are way too hesitant to tell a couple when they KNOW it's not going to work. You should learn how to communicate better from marriage counseling. Watch out for therapists that have issues with men, women, or certain types of each. If one or the other pushes the therapist's buttons, he or she will leave one or the other partners regretting the time in therapy.

Answer 4

It only works if you both go into the sessions wanting to keep the marriage. I went knowing I had no intentions of staying married. I only went to save face...I did learn a lot about communication but it didn't save my marriage...because I didn't want it to.

Answer 5

Yes, me and my husband have. It only works if both party's are willing to work on the relationship and issues and are willing to make an effort to change - it worked for us.:o)

Answer 6

It might. Get a referral from a good source. Find he best practitioner in your area and make sure both people are committed to make it work and willing to be honest.

Answer 7

It only helps if both parties are willing to be open to get the help and open to constructive criticism from a 3rd party. One or the other usually get defensive.

Answer 8

Yes it can work. I have done it myself and things are better. Also worked on stress unit for years and saw it do wonders for many people. Good luk.

Answer 9

yes i went by myself for awhile, and my husband only went once. now i go by myself, so i can understand me. i do feel that this is a good step in the right direction even if only one person in the marraige wants to see a counselor. good luck. it does work, i reccomend it to anyone with marraige problems, it helped me see how i can love myself.

Answer 10

I would but the less time I spend with my husband, the better we get along.