Mature ladies only, your suggestion please!?

Question

37 yrsld/m 54yrsld/F
I Have been intimate with a woman on three seperate occasions, I have taken her from xxx a to z and back again because I enjoy our times spent together, I have other responsibilities and they do not afford me the time nor the emotional energy to invest full time into a relationship.

I have explained this time and time over, and each time she understands til we xxx again. I am not confused ladies the lovin' is great and the no strings attached part was the best, I say was because It already seems as if she's broken the agreemet.
We entered this knowing all that I have expressed as regards the arrangement.
Yet now I am thinking its time to move on. But I seriously don't want to leave any emotional discomfort behind.

Answer 1

Well if it's time to move on because you are starting to fell uncomfortable, then maybe you need to have the talk with her. Mention that she knew the terms to the agreement the both of you agreed upon, but feel that she is not holding up to her side...which in turn makes you feel "uncomfortable" because you don't want to hurt her emotionally! Don't forget to mention all the great XXX you guys had and will never forget it! Just to let you know you are going to have this kind of trouble with the majority of ladies! After a few times of great XXX they tend to become emotionally involved even if the guy isn't!!! So just know what you are getting into the next time! Good luck stud muffin!!!!!!!!!!

Answer 2

You don't have any choice about the emotional discomfort. It's on the horizon for that relationship.

Why are you hanging out with older women anyway? Don't mean to be rude but is it because they are flattered and grateful for your attention so you can talk them into no attachments? I'm 56 myself. So here's an answer from a mature woman.

Frankly, if you want a mature woman, you haven't found her yet. Now why would I say that? Because a mature woman will know herself well enough to know that if she is willing to have xxx with you, then she is wanting a commitment. She's looking at the fact that she's not getting any younger and doesn't want to be alone for the rest of her life.

So, if you need xxx without commitments, then you will have to stick to immature women who don't know what in the heck they are worth and who are willing to sell themselves down the creek for a few minutes of pleasure instead of life time of commitment.

Answer 3

If your not looking to take this any further then a sexual level, and she is wanting more then its time to move on regaurdless. Tell her that you like her, and love the time you spent together, but you know she is looking for more then what you can give her in this time of your life, and you think its best for you to stop seeing eachother now before the feelings get stronger, and someone ends up actually getting hurt. NEVER stay with someone that you are having a casual thing with once the person ends up developing feelings unless you can see staying with them, it only leads them on to believe that something more will eventually happen, and when it dont further down the road they end up hurting more then they would in the current time if you end things now because they will be more attached later on. Just make sure she understands your just ending things because you dont want to see her hurt, and if she says she can handle it, or anything like that then let her know how she is already wanting more, and in time those feelings are just going to get stronger, and its not something your looking for which is why you know its time to move on. Good luck..

Answer 4

I am a woman in my 40s, women are human too, so they can get emotional about relationship despite knowing that there wont be any commitment from the men's side. i think it is time you should try to distance yourself from her. Not isolate her but cool off first before she could go any deeper . If she 's not a "psycho" type, give her some time and she will digest the idea. I prefer the straight forward method rather than neither here nor there. Furthermore you would hurt her more.

Answer 5

You're screwed, buddy. All of the women I know (friends included) who claim they are not getting emotionally involved are LIARS. I don't think it's genetically possible for women to not get attached when sex is involved. Everything was okay before because you didn't tell her that you didn't want to be with her. Now that she knows that you're trying to let go and stop any chances of a relationship, she is hurt. And rightfully so! She is going to feel used no matter what you do, so I suggest you either make the time to work on a relationship or just let her go and not contact her again. There is no such thing as "just being friends" after you've crossed the intimacy line.

Answer 6

You stated there was not supposed to be any strings attached , And then you say if you leave there is going to be emotional stress. It seems that you may have been passive aggressive in this arrangement. And your friend may have thought that if the sex in this relationship was exceptional things might turn around. I would sit this person down gently and explain the terms of your agreement in the beginning. And as sad and inhumane as it may sound if, you both can not agree on the terms set forth in the original arrangement then it is best to sever ties....

Answer 7

The answer is you can't. Human beings are not robots, and a female is wired in such a way that any expression of sexuality has an emotional effect. If you want out, that's your prerogative. Youl should tell her how much you appreciated what you two had, however you feel she deserves better if she wants a real relationship. If you are sure, be firm. Try your best to actually make her feel good about herself after saying good bye.

Answer 8

Any time there is that kind of encounter there are some type of emotions involved, even if they only revolve around lust. If you are not interested in more with this woman, it is time to move on, hurt her or not, so that she can move on and find someone who is looking for the same things in life.
Just explain to her that you feel she is ready for more then you are and you think it is best for you to set her free to find someone who has the same goals in life. Then STOP bangin her!

Answer 9

Hey if she can't understand the terms then move on. There are ladies out there that don't want a relationship, either. Trust me, if she doesn't understand now when you're just starting out, wait until she has invested more time in you. Then it will be harder to leaver her behind.

Answer 10

Too late. You should have known that women have much more attachment to sex than men usually and that this would happen. If there is no hope for a relationship, leave now and don't cause any more damage!