My husband does not celebrate any holidays or birthdays due to his religion (Jehovah's Witness). He is not yet a Jehovah's Witness but he follows that belief because he was raised that way. I am not Jehovah's Witness and although I don't agree with some things I have learned to accept his religion. We have been married for three years. My mom's side of the family is very close so we get together on every holiday or birthday. My husband never attends. They all know why he doesn't, but two aunts in particular continue to dwell on the fact that my husband doesn't participate. They say things like, "It's just Mother's day dinner" or "It's just a birthday dinner. Nobody is celebrating anything". For instance, we all went out to Mother's day dinner yesterday. My aunt asked me, "____ didn't want to go with us?" My other aunt called from out of state and asked if my husband went with us. They already know the answer before they ask. How can I put a stop to this without being rude?
2007-05-14 11:04:53 · 15 answers · asked by Hoping he will bless me with #1 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I have told them a million times that neither he or his parents celebrate ANY holidays or birthdays. My grandmother was having a birthday party last year and my mom insisted on inviting my husband's parents even though she knows they don't celebrate and won't come. I have to constantly battle with my aunts and in a polite way say you know they don't celebrate anything so why do you all continue to ask me that? They will say well it's silly. There's nothing wrong with them at least coming even if they don't celebrate. I will explain to them again and they will back off, until the next family gathering. Then they will ask me why my husband didn't come or they will ask if he is coming. It drives me nuts because now that I am finally over it, they can't leave it alone. Also, why do they care? What business is it of theirs? My mother even does it at times and she will pretend as if she forgot that they don't celebrate. No you didn't! It's been three years.
2007-05-14 11:08:31 · update #1
You can tell them that this will be the last time they'll ask you this question, becuse you won't respond to it again. Then, ignore them if they ask again, and they will get you are serious and that whatever their opinion is doesn't matter to you.
2007-05-14 11:14:16 · answer #1 · answered by whitexsaucer 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well you kindly get those two aunts together explain to him that what your husband chooses is his decisions and that you don't appreciate nor will you tolerate their medling ways anylonger. You are a married woman and what happens in your household and between you and your husband is no ones business. You make that point very clear. Don't feel bad if their elderly because even they sometimes need to be put in their place. Be strong and good luck :)
2007-05-14 11:12:26 · answer #2 · answered by stormfire_06 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This questioner can explain that this teasing exacerbates the matter.
Ironically, if these family members were not working to foil this Jehovah's Witness's faith, the Witness would likely be happy to work with the family so that his religious convictions could be accommodated allowing him to conscientiously participate in these family functions.
As things are now, this Witness likely feels that these family members are hoping that he will compromise his faith, and he rightly understands that he is a "theatrical spectacle".
(Hebrews 10:32-33) You endured a great contest under sufferings, sometimes while you were being exposed as in a theater both to reproaches and tribulations
If the spirit of "gotcha" were not an issue, a typical Witness is happy to arrange to come before or after the actual "celebration" is scheduled. But, if others continue working to make religious differences into a controversy, a Witness will take a stand.
(2 Timothy 1:7-8) God gave us not a spirit of cowardice, but that of power and of love and of soundness of mind. Therefore do not become ashamed of the witness about our Lord
Learn more:
http://watchtower.org/e/lmn/index.htm?article=article_08.htm
http://watchtower.org/e/rq/index.htm?article=article_11.htm
http://watchtower.org/e/20041215/article_02.htm
http://watchtower.org/e/20011115/article_02.htm
http://watchtower.org/e/20050101a/
http://watchtower.org/e/jt/
2007-05-14 12:15:53 · answer #3 · answered by achtung_heiss 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
relies upon on what you mean by applying 'meddling'. If it is into very own issues, communicate on your mate approximately it, and it would be as much as him to inform his area of the kin so as that they don't experience you're in charge and coming from him they'll realize it is extreme. Meddling takes on an excellent section, be extra particular. in the event that they're 'nosey', it fairly is yet another difficulty altogether! the two you and your mate would desire to place an end to that precise from the get pass. Nip it interior the bud as they are asserting. human beings will basically walk throughout you in case you enable them to. wish you properly.
2016-11-03 22:28:05 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't. They are meddling aunts and always will be. Just take a deep breath and answer them the way you always do...they are never going to accept or understand so you are better off not rocking the boat any more that it already rocks by starting a tiff about it.
2007-05-14 11:10:24 · answer #5 · answered by allrightythen 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you thought of asking them if they would like him to stop by their home or they can come to your home and he can explain what his beliefs are.
JWs are loving and caring for their mother, fathers, children, all of their family. This is not expressed once a year by a dinner or a cake. It is expressed all year long in what they do.
Of course they honor their fathers and mothers - this is written in the Bible.
As far as holidays - you know and so does he that these are pagan and do not belong in a home that loves and honors our Heavenly Father.
2007-05-14 13:05:01 · answer #6 · answered by cordsoforion 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just stand up to them, tell them that its his religion and your marriage! Tell them that if you don't have a problem and no one else has a problem then neither should they! They need to just butt out and let you live your life with your husband. I have family members who are mormon, jewish, catholic, and a few baptists, but we all get along and we all accept each other because that is what family does!! They stick by each other to love and support. Tell your aunts to butt out! I would tell my aunts to butt out! LOL then again my aunts are all very nosey and always want to know where my hubby is when he isn't at family functions, but that is cause they miss him more than they miss me LOL! Good Luck!! Family is difficult, but they are family!
2007-05-14 11:14:00 · answer #7 · answered by Drea Z 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell the medling aunts that your husband has vowed to dispense with his religion and celebrate for days when they kick the bucket! That will shut them up.
2007-05-14 11:18:13 · answer #8 · answered by Knowledge Thirsty 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
call them all togather, make it a good atmosphere, do pot luck or bbq or something and when everyone is there, tell them you would like to talk to them and very nicly approach the issue and explain that it is your husband and you have accepted him and they need to do the same because it is causing a huge rift between them and you and you dont wish to discuss it any more if they dont like it, thats too bad its yours and your husbands choice. ( i know it might be hard, as my family and i are very close as well) good luck
2007-05-14 11:26:56 · answer #9 · answered by arizonaprincess2 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell them your husband decided to take cash instead of gifts and eating out, then ask them do they have any money, any at all that they'd like to donate to this cause?
2007-05-14 12:02:33 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋