He basically abandoned our son right after he told me he was divorcing me. He moved to another state and was remarried within 6 months. He calls our son every night, has since he left. Our son misses him terribly but considers him more of a friend than a father. Even when my ex was living here he was an absentee father. I am trying not to be bitter for the betrayal but we were married for 25 years and the only good thing to come of it was our son. He sent me a text message on Mothers Day, not a card, so was not sure whether I should do this.
2007-05-14 03:40:35 · 41 answers · asked by chetey 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I think that would be a real nice gesture. You are a better person than most to even consider sending an ex a card. The world needs more people like you.
2007-05-14 03:44:45 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Heavens no, he is not your father. Let your son do what ever he wants on father's day.
By the way your husband was not abandoning the boy, he was abandoning you and the son was a causality.
You really have no idea what the son thinks of his father (and there is no need to). Do not acknowledge the text message on Mother's Day.
I think it is time for you to move on with your life and stop thinking so much about the ex.
2007-05-14 03:46:29 · answer #2 · answered by lily 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's not your father and hasn't been a father to you children. My son's father also sent me a text message on mother's day I replied a simply "thank you" because he too hasn't been a father to my son. I have no intentions of sending him a text message on father's day or having my son send a card. As I said, producing a child doesn't make a man a father. My husband is more of a father to my son and has been in the short time we've been together than his father has all his life. Father's day will be spent celebrating my husband, not my son's father.
2007-05-14 03:46:03 · answer #3 · answered by Brandy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that you answered your own question. Since it is Father's day, then your son should be the one to send a card, if he desires to do so. You can mail it or put a stamp on the card, but the card should come from the son of the father, not the ex-wife of the father. If he is not old enough to write, he can draw a picture or scribbe for that matter. If the child is old enough to send a card, and chooses not to, then Don't send one.
2007-05-14 03:45:57 · answer #4 · answered by auditor4u2007 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't waste your time or money on a man who was never there for your son. If your son wants to then there isn't anything wrong with him picking out the card. He sounds like a jerk to me. My first husband was like that. I raised 3 children on my own and they still think that he is their dad. The only good thing out of the marriage was my children. We are now divorced and thank God he died.
2007-05-14 03:53:45 · answer #5 · answered by Nancy M 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You shouldn't send your ex-husband anything, ever, from you. Your relationship is over. You should, however, encourage your son to send his father a card. Whether he is a great dad or a horrible dad, you want to encourage the relationship between them so that if it doesn't work out in later years, you cannot be blamed for keeping them apart.
2007-05-14 03:51:22 · answer #6 · answered by Tangled Web 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would give him a card, just to show there are no hard feelings, and since he is a father, and is active in your sons life, he should get some recognization, but, if you think it might be awkward, a text message is at least something.
2007-05-14 03:43:39 · answer #7 · answered by Erin 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
for sure you ought to deliver a sympathy card. You were married for 25 years! i'd chorus from including a own note except possibly "he will be very much neglected" or something alongside those lines. His moves on the funeral probably had more beneficial to do consisting of his new different halves thoughts about you than his and now might want to be no longer the time to stir the pot. yet convinced, this is basically elementary courtesy. in case you'll extremely opt to deliver something that's more beneficial an expression of your real thoughts possibly you would possibly want to deliver it to a unique member of the relations you've been close to to.
2016-10-18 07:49:11 · answer #8 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why would you send a guy that "abandoned" you and your son a Father's Day card?
I thought Father's Day was to honor GOOD Fathers?
2007-05-14 03:43:49 · answer #9 · answered by Mary A 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Definitely not. He's your X. Not your father. If your son wishes to send him a card, than he should do so. Since he speaks to your son daily, then he hasnt abandoned him.
2007-05-14 03:47:19 · answer #10 · answered by iyamacog 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋