My married woman friend from work is having an affair with a man behind her husbands back. He seems to call all of the shots and only sees her when he wants to. She does his shopping for him and constantly goes to see him for an hour at a time. He only texts her back when he seems to feel like it and she also told me he has a picture of himself and another woman in his living room.
The thing is she has very little confidence, hates her husband and seems to go to the length of wishing herself dead if her new man wouldnt want to see her any more. I don't think she trusts him.
What do you think she should do?
2007-05-14 03:25:11 · 42 answers · asked by snapesbabe 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Note this is not me, I am not married and am not having an affair with the guy up the road. I would not let a man play me in this way
2007-05-14 03:34:37 · update #1
ROFLMAO I'm sorry, she's worried about the man she's cheating with cheating on her. ROFLMAO that right there is the funniest thing I think I've read on here in a while. She needs to get some help, therapy, something and move on with her life. She's looking for her happiness in the arms of men and when she isn't finding it suddenly life isn't worth living. The only person that is ultimately responsible for her self esteem and way of thinking is her and right now she's doing a piss poor job of it. You should encourage her to get out of both situations ASAP and take care of herself.
2007-05-14 03:46:02 · answer #1 · answered by indydst8 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well if she will have an affair with somebody she can hardly expect him to be honest can she? She's not being honest herself to somebody, so what right does she have to tell him to be honest to her. It would be a hypocrisy.
I think- as any sane human would- that she should stop seeing this man immediately, and go and sort her marriage out. Either split with her husband or fix the mess. That should be the priority before she begins a new relationship.
This is a horrible mess and it will end in heartbreak, I fear she will probably have to learn this the hard way and you will be able to nothing other than comfort her when it all explodes in her face.
You could giver her advice, we all know seeing married people and having affairs is disasterous, there is evidence all over this place of it every day. Sadly the people involved never seem to understand- until it's far too late... that you can not have real and lasting relationships based on lies...
love
Lady Seph
x
2007-05-14 03:33:05 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all, what she needs to do is get her head straight. If she is going to play with fire she is going to get burned. And thai is exactly what she is doing. This guy is just using her as a booty call. He does not like her at all and has no intentions of starting a serious relationship with your friend. If your friend ever divorces her husband for this guy he will never have trust in her. This guy will never trust your friend for the simple reason that she is cheating on her husband. The first thing he is going to think is if she is cheating on her husband, she will cheat on him also when she gets tired of him.
What your friend needs to do is first of all get rid of this guy. He is just using her when he wants to have her in his bed. The next thing your friend needs to do is see a family counselor. She needs to find out if she really does hate her husband or she is only very upset with him. Then she will have to make a choice with her husband. She will try to get things working out for them or she will start divorcing him. I was in a similar situation years ago. I wasn't sure of leaving the woman i was married too because I was afraid of being alone. I didn't go looking for another woman just to feel better. I just filed for the divorce and dealt with the process one day at a time. Now I am in a much better situation than ever. I am enjoy life to the fullest. So your friend needs to staighten up and start taking action immediately.
Love The Punk Doctor
2007-05-14 03:50:32 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think she should dump him, see if her marriage can be saved and, if not, dump her husband as well. My marriage split up last year because of another woman. At that time my confidence and self-esteem were at an all time low,but 12 months on I have a good social life and more importantly I am really happy with my single life. Men are basically selfish and think only of themselves. It sounds to me like this man is using her as and when he wants her. Tell her to have some dignity and ditch him.
2007-05-14 03:36:31 · answer #4 · answered by Sheila C 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She should stop compounding the problems of an unhappy marriage with an unhappy affair. She needs to confess her indiscresion to her husband and either seek a divorce or repair the damage that has been done. I don't understand why she should have the expectation that this man should be faithful to only her when she is not faithful to her husband. She is only causing herself more pain and frustration.
2007-05-14 03:32:37 · answer #5 · answered by juda75 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
of course she doesn't trust him because SHE is cheating. She sounds really mixed up. I would leave the husband if she has to resort to cheating on him, obviously not happy. How would she feel if her hubby cheated on her? The other guy sounds like he has someone else in his life. But if he is single and not married then he has every right to date as many as he wants. Thats how you find out who you want to be with in life. Besides he knows who she goes home to every night. Do you honestly he is sitting there waiting for her to come back? I would suggest she get things straight with hubby then shop around when she can give all then they will probably give all.
2007-05-14 03:34:48 · answer #6 · answered by Maria 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why the hell did she marry this man if she "hates" him in the first place???
If she hates him why would she cheat on him? Why doesn't she just leave him?
She cannot get upset because this man treats her this way nor can she get mad because he has a picture of some woman in his living room..SHE IS MARRIED and it's not her business what this man has in his house...
All i have to say is Karma is a b*tch and she will get what she deserves...
Her husband does not deserve this, what makes you think she deserves any better??
What goes around, comes around!
2007-05-14 03:40:08 · answer #7 · answered by Kasja 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are a true friend for being concerned about her. If she is miserable with her husband she should try counseling both individual and marital. She has enough confidence to be married and carry on with another guy. If she has self esteem issues and she is allowing this new dude to walk all over her them she need to get some professional help Karma is a you know what...what she is putting out there she is getting in return.. I feel for your friend and I hope she gets some help before her situation gets worse, especially if her husband finds out.
2007-05-14 03:39:53 · answer #8 · answered by Lil_MissVal 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think your friend should get her life on the right track. She's married! And she's worried about her boyfriend cheating? She needs to go see a lawyer and file for divorce before setting her sights on a relationship. Is she one of those kind that gets a new man in her grips before leaving the old man?
2007-05-14 03:34:59 · answer #9 · answered by Flying w/ scissors 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Looks like your friend's not getting much out of this. She should open her eyes and realise this, ditch the married man - he's not giving her what she really wants. Look at her dependence on men bigtime. Then decide to try to make her marriage work or leave it and be her own woman. It's all be very hard and I wish her lots of strength.
2007-05-14 05:53:50 · answer #10 · answered by blackhole 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋