...he never thank me for the cards. We have been divorce for many years. Shall I stop the cards. I never hear from him on Mother Day.
2007-05-13 16:30:52 · 17 answers · asked by didibailey 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I just ran into the same situation. I am currently going through a divorce, and got my wife a mother's day card and gift from my son of six years old. Well, she did not say thanks; instead she snapped that I did not need to get her anything. I reminded her that this was from our son, and he picked it out.
Personally, this hurt me. I "wanted" to hear her say thank you, and was angry about this for several days before I realized that my ego was getting in the way. I wanted to hear her acknowledge that I did something nice for her, but that is not really why I got the gift. I got the gift for my son, so he could participate in mother's day, and so that he could see the importance of honoring his mother on this holiday. Hindsight being what it is, I realized I was being selfish about why I gave her the gift. She is a good mother with our son, and even though we are getting divorced I can honor that and she deserves it.
So, my advice is do not stop sending the cards. If anything, get your children more involved in the process so that the cards come from them more and you less. Take your ego out of the process, and expect nothing in return. Have them pick out gifts that have meaning for them for their father. Teach them that, even with divorced parents, honoring good parents is important and worthwhile.
Guy Getting Divorced
http://divorceandevolution.blogspot.com
2007-05-17 08:06:36 · answer #1 · answered by divorceandevolving 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Heavens no, he is not your father. Let your son do what ever he wants on father's day. By the way your husband was not abandoning the boy, he was abandoning you and the son was a causality. You really have no idea what the son thinks of his father (and there is no need to). Do not acknowledge the text message on Mother's Day. I think it is time for you to move on with your life and stop thinking so much about the ex.
2016-05-17 10:43:02 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, if it's been many years, then I'm assuming that the boys are old enough to send their father their own cards? If so, it's time to stop. It's great that you appreciate the gift he's given you and acknowledge that you appreciate him as a father, however, once the children are old enough to do it on their own, it's no longer necessary for you to keep doing it. Especially if it's going un-noticed. I'm sorry to hear he doesn't reciprocate.
Have a great Mother's Day!
2007-05-13 16:38:55 · answer #3 · answered by Hollynfaith 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As long as your sons are living at home and too young to do it themselves, I think you're doing the right thing getting the Fathers' Day card for them. Once they are old enough to do it themselves then I'd stop.
You're being the bigger person and doing what you should do to help your sons in their relationship with their father. You can't control what he does, but when they are grown and gone they will remember and appreciate that you were doing the right thing.
2007-05-13 16:35:36 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it would be safe of you to stop giving your ex a Father's Day card. Just make sure your sons give him cards, until they are able to get him cards on their own.
2007-05-17 15:04:28 · answer #5 · answered by Tweety 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just think of it this way. You are only giving your ex husband a card for your kids sake. You are teaching them to give to others and think of them on that special day. Him on the other hand is not thinking of the kids. Just continue to give him a card from the kids. Your kids will always remember you being so giving. Happy Mothers Day to you.
2007-05-13 16:38:33 · answer #6 · answered by luvlisteningtomusic 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That's up to you of course, but since you are asking - I'd say stop. If he doesn't respond to them and you are not together, what would be the point? Are you sons old enough to express father's day wishes? Also, I learned a long time ago not to expect to hear nice wishes or gifts and I'm always surprised when I do get them.
2007-05-13 16:35:57 · answer #7 · answered by pinniethewooh 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well... you should not do it without your son's knowledge. If your son is still young you do not have to do it. If your son is big enough to understand, then do it to teach your son that family after all is important. Their father is also important to them and when you are no longer around, they should know that the father will love them too..
Don't expect him to thank you for that. He won't as he deemed that this is from his sons. And that is exactly what you should think as well.. So if he wants to thank, then he should be thanking his sons..
What you have done, don't expect him to do the same...
You should move on in your life... looks like you still hope to rekindle your relationship...
take care
2007-05-13 16:38:45 · answer #8 · answered by trymejames 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe the mothering is coming out in you, but why are you expecting a guy to dothe same as you. I mean come on. guys dont think like we do. you are trying to be nice and he is probably moving on and invovled in someone else and she is jealous of you. i say you get over it and stop the cards. whats the points. he doesnt care and doesnt have the manners to thank you. why continue.
2007-05-13 16:40:31 · answer #9 · answered by Christina 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You take your boys to the store and with their allowance tell them to buy THEIR dad a card for his birthday and Father's day.
You are divorced. That means he doesn't have to do anything for you nor you him. Get on with your life and teach your boys to be considerate of their dad. That's the best thing you can do.
2007-05-13 17:29:54 · answer #10 · answered by atheleticman_fan 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋