getting married soon but my future wife has debt and i do not!?

Question

i will be getting married soon but my future wife has around $26,000 of debt from college and her car. and i do not have no debt, and my credit score is perfect, now from my understanding when married her debt is now my debt which is bullshit if you ask me. and i also have quit a bit of money saved in a personal savings account that i have saved through the years from my hourly job. first off will her debt show up on my credit report as me owing $26,000 when married too? and the money i have saved i do not want to tell her as of right now until i feel comfortable later on to see how the marrige works out because who the hell knows if someday i get a divorce paper unexpectedly or something who knows what the future holds what looks good today which it is otherwise i would not be marrying her, might not be good tommarow?

Answer 1

You really have a big decision to make! If this is really a serious issue with you it might be wise to wait until she's out of debt to get married. Is there a need to get married so soon?? You might want to weigh the pro's and cons before you go ahead with the marriage. If she loves you enough she can wait.

Answer 2

If you live in the U.S...

A spouse’s debt that was acquired prior to the marriage does NOT become your debt when you marry. However, there certainly are ways in which it could have an effect on you. For example, if the two of you purchase property together, then because her name is on the title, her creditor can place a lien on it for her bad debt, which means when you sell your property, they’ll be paid.

So, basically, while you’re not technically, legally responsible, it can, in a round-about way, affect you.

Regarding credit records, you each have a separate credit record and it will remain that way even after you marry. So, her poor credit score will not affect your credit score. However, in the event that you purchase something together, the company will look at BOTH credit scores and may deny the loan if her credit score is very bad. By the way, IF this leads you to think that you can just put everything in your name alone and that way it will be ‘yours’ when you divorce (because you seem to think that you will), that isn’t going to work. Generally speaking, anything acquired during the marriage is martial property regardless of whose name is/isn’t on the title.

As far as your money…generally speaking, any money acquired PRIOR to a marriage is considered separate funds (not martial funs) as long as it remains separate (ie you don’t deposit it into an bank account with both your names).

With all that said, if this is your attitude--wanting to hide money--then you don’t need to be getting married. I’d suggest that you rethink it.

Answer 3

Why don't you live together first and when she pays all that dept off then you can marry her. Don't tell her that is what you are doing though. But then, maybe you might want her to build up a savings to match yours before you get married. If she decided to "walk" is she worth $26k to you? Doesn't sound like she is. Getting married is a roll of the dice buddy. No matter how much faith you have in the person you are going to marry you just never know what you are really getting.

Answer 4

lol...thats weird to see that someone is in the same situation as i am. my b/f owes more than that. that is the only reason y we're not married. i also assumed the same things about debt as you. its ok to have doubts, but dont lie to her or keep secrets from her. and if your going to get married her baggage comes with her....don't forget. its probably easier if you help her start a savings account, and teach her how to pay her debt off, with an hourly job. once you see her changing her spending habits and see her paying off her debt, even if its slowly, maybe you could get married. than from than on its the two of you against the world, you need to both be paying it off-regardless. love is unconditional-including her way of accumulating debt.
thats what im doing anyhow..

Answer 5

When my first husband and I divorced, I paid every single penny I owed and that of my kids, medical bills, car, etc. I refused to pay for any of his since I never saw him again. 7 years later, I was engaged to my now husband and didn't think it was right for him to pay my exes bills. I went bankrupt on only my exes stuff because my lawyer told me if I didn't then my now husband would have had to or have his wages attached.

Your future wife should take care of this stuff before you marry. But this too, should be talked about before you get married. Leave nothing hidden because it will come out in the open eventually. I know if my husband did this to me, I would be very hurt and question the trust issue in our relationship.

Answer 6

I think all pre-marriage counseling should include credit counseling. Her debt is yours and you should alert her to your concerns. The fact that you are asking for strangers advice regarding your future marriage does not bode well for the nuptials, marriage should be a sacred union and the two of you should be addressing this issue.

That much debt is nothing to laugh at, however it does seem to have been in the pursuit of bettering her chances at long term higher earnings in the form of a College Education. Perhaps you will come out on the short end of the stick in the end.

Answer 7

Make sure you pay all the bills, ask for her paycheck every week and put enough away to take care of the payment. Make sure that you make the payment with her checking account and not yours. My wife and I have kept separate checking accounts for over 17 years now and each one of us discuss the monthly bills and what to pay and who is to pay it, both of our names are on each others accounts and one or the other pays the bills we share the duty. So it's best to be up front now because you don't want a mess later, I had that with my first wife and it cost me a heck of a lot more than the $26,000 debt that your future wife has.

Answer 8

CONGRATULATIONS FOR U AND YOUR FUTURE WIFE. U ARE NOT ALONE WITH DEBT PROBLEMS EITHER. U HAVE TWO THINGS TO DO BEFORE U GET MARRIED. LOOK UP PROGRAMS THAT WILL HELP U TO CONSOLIDATE THE DEBT. IT HELPS BY HAVING MONTHLY PAYMENTS TAKEN OUT OF YOUR CHECKING ACCOUNT. SO BY THE TIME U TWO GET MARRIED THIS DEBT SITUATION WILL NOT AFFECT U OR YOUR FUTURE WIFE. IF U ARE GOING TO MARRY THE WOMAN OF YOUR DREAMS, I AM SURE U CAN TRUST HER WITH YOUR SAVINGS. NO SECRETS WILL MAKE BOTH OF U VERY HAPPY. REMEMBER THAT COMMUNICATION IS A VERY BIG FACTOR IN ANY RELATIONSHIP.

Answer 9

Being in debt doesn't necessarily mean that you have bad credit. The school debt in fact is "good" debt if she's paying her bills on time.

You may not be ready for marriage if you are ready to keep secrets from your future wife.

Answer 10

Her debt would become your debt. If I was you I would think this through before taking the big leap. Starting off a marriage "IN" debts like that is not a good idea. Think about what tomorrow might bring.