It's me again...about the husband frequenting bars - one last question for tonight. I fear that in leaving, he'll blame me for giving up on the marriage - even though he's the cause of us getting to this point. How do I become strong enough to make that decision for the better of me and my sanity? It has taken me a long while to get here because I truly would love to stay with him, but I know I can't keep going on like this. (I liked the suggestion of the ultimatum - the bar or me. I think I've given it to him without actually saying it.) With his behaviors I've now come to the point that I don't feel loved or valued. I'm very attractive and sometimes wish I could just gain some attention but that is sooooo not me nor of God. I hate how I'm feeling and hate that I'm so confused. I never imagined that marriage was like this or that I would ever have to endure such feelings. (I would like some men to be some of the responses posted. What is my husband thinking?)
2007-05-13 15:10:32 · 8 answers · asked by working on my marriage 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He's gonna say whatever he wants- that doesn't make it true!
The person in the wrong always tries to make the other person look like it is their fault. You need to make a list of those who support you and shut out the negative from him and his friends/family. You have the right to be loved, cherished and cared for!
2007-05-13 17:50:33 · answer #1 · answered by atheleticman_fan 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Huhmmmm. It is your choice, if you feel you have tried and tried and he is not interested in doing the same and your misery out weights your happiness. Then it is time. I bad as I hate to say it because I didn't ever want to be divorced. He will blame you no matter what, it is your choice to except the blame or stand up and say no. He will blame you because he sees nothing wrong in what he is doing or what is going on and you are the one with the problems. Just fight and stay strong like you have so far and it will all come an end.
2007-05-13 15:29:51 · answer #2 · answered by CaseyK 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Life is short don't spend it hurt or one of the million other bad feelings that could be listed. You sound like a good person and I believe you will find your stenght with in your self. You know theres alot of people hurting in this world for one reason or the other and as bad as it is you have to have the bad to compare and appretiate what can be totally good. When one door closes another opens and when you feel alone God is always there. Follow his path where ever it may lead and happiness and good will be waiting. God Bless good luck and be strong.
2007-05-13 15:24:45 · answer #3 · answered by lyttledarlin 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
have faith don't experience responsible for something he placed you with the aid of I comprehend which you the two rushed into it and all it further grow to be complications yet a minimum of you could say which you began with love. the only rationalization why you could experience responsible is by the fact your leaving somebody you achieved grown related to and mushy with even although now there is not any love and your waiting to get out your guilt could come from interior to the place once you eventually make that option to get out that he won't comprehend what to do without you!
2016-10-15 21:57:55 · answer #4 · answered by quellette 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Guilt in any area of your life will be there as long as you let yourself feel it. Unfortunately, it does take both people to have a relationship. One bad partner can ruin it. There is no way to predict if two people will grow together. You might always wonder "what if"... but you will wonder regardless of the decision you make.
2007-05-13 15:18:58 · answer #5 · answered by Chris 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, you have posted 3 questions, that i know of, in one night on this one issue. You need to get some help. This is obviously eating you up inside. I already answered one of yours and i will stick by what i said then, pack your bags and if he watches you go, then you have your answer.
2007-05-13 15:17:01 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Guilt is something that you can choose to carry or not. If you walk away knowing that you gave your marriage everything that you could, then there's no reason for guilt. You cannot make someone be the person that you need them to be. Remember that.
2007-05-13 15:15:03 · answer #7 · answered by Royalhinney 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Ask the question "Am I better off with him or without him?"
What about your mental health?
2007-05-13 15:20:07 · answer #8 · answered by Experto Credo 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋