and to be honest, I really don't want to be. I'm happy with myself, even though the way of life I choose may be considered dowdy or plain. But I'm happy.
Sometimes though, I wish I was more mainstream, even though I know it will never happen. I see family members that push me to cut my hair this way, buy these jeans, and so on. I never do, but I always wind up feeling like I am really ugly or something is wrong with me. My husband assures me I am not, but those feelings linger in the back of my mind...
I don't know what to do about this.
2007-05-13 14:34:24 · 15 answers · asked by emmyfair 3 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
i think that as long as you feel happy, you are worthwhile and so if your life
i know what you mean when sometimes you feel like nothing is going on in your life and nothing exciting ever happens
sometimes you wonder what you would be like if you got a new hairstyle or changed your style of clothing and what others would think of you
i would suggest to try some interesting activities, get some cool new hobbies going on....something that will excite you or motivate you and something that you will look forward to
take great care in the simple things in life and always be positive
2007-05-13 14:40:42 · answer #1 · answered by Ches 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nobody could possibly feel 100% happy with themselves 100% of the time, but if it bothers you that much, you could try talking to your doctor because there might be some medication to help you with your self-esteem. You should get together with some of your friends who have similar tastes as you, and have a girls day out where you go shopping, get your hair done, etc. Just don't worry about what others say and what their style is. Everyone's different, and it sounds like your husband wouldn't want you any other way than how you already are. : )
2007-05-13 21:38:52 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
They don't you want you to be the cool kid they just think you could do better take more pride in yourself.
This sounds crazy but try this it will work, excercise. Go for a brisk walk or a jog in the morning it will energise you give a chance to be alone and think. It's amazing how much better you will fell after excersing. Or if your into skipping do that for 5 or 10 minutes.
After a while you fell better, the connection does not seem obvious but try it and you will see I am right. What do you have to lose.
2007-05-13 21:50:04 · answer #3 · answered by Lou 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you have a husband, to me that would signify that you are too old to be playing "the cool girl" Instead why don't you focus on things like your relationship and your people skills and shake the need to be some kind of prom queen years past high school
2007-05-13 21:38:08 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not married, but one thing is that if you were not as pretty as your husband says you are your husband would have done or said something if he did not like your style, beauty is not just from the outside you might have a great personality, let those people live there lives and you live yours, the important thing is that your husband love you just as you are. keep being yourself, God bless you. Take care, and do not let them get to you.
2007-05-13 21:49:31 · answer #5 · answered by nansaywon 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know it sound repetitious, but worry a little more about the kind of education you are giving yourself and less about being more cool, in the end, it really didn't matter.
On another note, think of the kids that would like to be cool at all, never mind worrying about being more cool.
2007-05-13 21:37:30 · answer #6 · answered by Mystee_Rain 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've learned from personal experience that trying to be mainstream for some people is sometimes just not worth the effort. Like me. Its important that you're happy with who you are. People eventually learn to accept you for who you are.
2007-05-13 21:40:15 · answer #7 · answered by Sean A 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Quite frankly, my dear, you need to discover who you are rather than becoming who other people want you to become. One theme in Shakespeare's play Hamlet was "To be, or not to be." Being somebody that other people doesn't work is not the way it is supposed to be.
You should not be created in the image of other people's thoughts. You are not somebody else's creation. You are not somebody else's Pygmalion Project.
Your responsibility is to yourself and your husband. My advice is to be what you want to be, not what your family wants you to be. Choose your own hair style, your own jeans, and your own way of doing things. That is what makes you uniquely you.
2007-05-13 23:52:47 · answer #8 · answered by Mark 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl let me tell ya what!!!Your "Husband " has final say as he thinks YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL!!!! But in all my yrs I have seen where a woman goes for a new "dew" recommended by a good salon to match your face and "Lo and behold " changed everything!!! Ever watch Oprah?"When the times are a changin' maybe you shoud too"
2007-05-13 21:46:23 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I learned this from my son: If at first you don't succeed, redefine success. Re-define your idea of what cool is.
I think you got it by the way, it seems to coincide with mine:
If I make myself happy then I will be assured of a lifetime of happiness.
2007-05-13 21:42:48 · answer #10 · answered by Freddy F 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋