sitting on the ledge
his hand holding mine
hoping for this to last forever
i watch him
his eyes meet mine
no one speaks
the silence grows
his grip loosens
he starts to fade
i reach for him but there is only air
i am falling
still hoping for his hand to reach down and grab mine
it never does
so all i can do is fall
and think about what could have been
2007-05-13 12:51:29 · 33 answers · asked by iANNA! 5 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Polls & Surveys
So highschool, and not very good highschool angst either! it also reminds me of a bad Whitney Houston or Celine Dion type song.
2007-05-21 08:36:58 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Wrong guy next to you..
you are reaching for something that is only in your mind Fantasy...
In love with the idea... of being with someone that will never leave.
2007-05-21 11:38:25 · answer #2 · answered by nana 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i like it, but maybe u could divide thsi line:
still hoping for his hand
to reach down and grab mine
but other than that i like it
2007-05-21 12:03:40 · answer #3 · answered by Cutie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's good- it would make a better song lyric than a poem, though. Very sad images. But good.
2007-05-13 12:54:46 · answer #4 · answered by PURR GIRL TORI 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need some time at a comedy club, Miss Cheer.
2007-05-13 12:55:22 · answer #5 · answered by ny21tb 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
this poem is very true it reflects a lot on a lot of peoples lives they r too scared that their love is going to disapear.. i love it!! <3
2007-05-21 09:17:14 · answer #6 · answered by Olga R 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweety keep writing,you have a raw talent there.
but make sure you dont use it at school, you saw what happend to the kid a few weeks ago, they thought because of his creative writing he was a whack job. and had him arrested and sent to shrink. sad when we cant be creative anymore.
2007-05-19 20:19:56 · answer #7 · answered by booboobear 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
I like i because I feel like this poem is important to you,but I see way too many poems like this if this is your style that great.Your making each line too specific like your telling the readers everything and not leaving anything to think about to not go "Oh" add a bit more flavor more deepness to it.
2007-05-13 12:55:48 · answer #8 · answered by ERIKA 1 · 0⤊ 3⤋
Yes.
2007-05-13 12:53:19 · answer #9 · answered by yahoobloo 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You mean on the song? I think its a wonderful song if thats what your asking.
2007-05-13 12:53:25 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋