Have friend that is married, she had affair with guy that is also married, they hooked up after 25 years of not seeing each other. He ended the romance to work things out with his wife but still calls her for lunch few times a month and texts her few times a week. Can they be friends?
2007-05-13 11:33:37 · 28 answers · asked by Melissa S 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
if the wife says its ok then yes, but they really shouldnt because the romance might spark up again. if it did before then it will again, and the girl is just going to get hurt and the man is going to end up losing his wife. so it probably isnt a good idea but if its there choice theres no point in trying to change it
2007-05-13 11:38:14 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋
Mellisa, First try to assess the root cause. The two people who have had a six month romantic fling are already married to others. In the first instance try to analyse why the fling has started. Fling has started only because both of them were interested in each other. There may also be a situation that both of them in their respect married life would have missed out something which they have got in this fling. The fling of 6 months is with a mutual understanding, to some extent even their respective married partners are to be blamed to have given them any sort of dissatisfaction that they have to look out another person out of the married life. Now since the thirst or hunger which they had has been satisfied in the 6 months romantic fling they have decided to stop their romantic fling. Now tell me what is wrong if they continue to remain as friends. According to me there is absolutely nothing wrong in their being friends.
2007-05-13 21:40:10 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think that 2 people that had an affair for 6 months can stay friends without circumstances. You said that he end it and yet he still calls her and have lunch with her. Do you think 2 people who spent times in bed for 6 months will stay friends and talk about the weather, or hows life itself??, I think not,one way or the other they will reminisce the stuff that they shared together.
If that man really wants to end it, he needs to stop the communication with her and work on his marriage, but I think he had an emotional feelings for this friend of yours......
2007-05-13 12:18:45 · answer #3 · answered by islandgirl06 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a joke right? I was married for 9 yrs to my second husband, 1st one is deceased. My second husband insisted that I sign a prenuptial but he promised he would make a will but he never did. He wouldn't do anything for me and was always telling me that I was lucky that I didn't have to pay rent. My name was on nothing and we stopped sleeping together for 3 years. We lived separate lives which left me open when I met the sweetest most sexiest man I have ever met in my life to fall in love so deeply that ONLY GOD could have possibly gotten my attention to not stay with this man. We lived together for 4 months and it felt like knives were stabbing me as I left. My daughter and others had to pack things up-emotionally I was a basket case. If this man did not live 300 miles away there is absolutely NO WAY WHATSOEVER THAT I COULD NOT FALL IN BED with him again. If I had not fallen so UTTERLY DEEPLY in love with this guy, even with my husband being the way that he was, I couldn't have done what I had done. But life and situations can cause you to have a much deeper understanding and compassion for people when they are tempted. Everyone is different though, I do have godly convictions or I would not have gone back to my husband even though he has made things right like they should have been all along. I have had so much resentment towards him because of so much rejection to me and my children that it has been a long hard haul of commitment and prayer to start having feelings for him again. Especially after meeting this person that I have felt more deep love than I have ever felt in my life. If she is really wanting to be right with her husband and God, she SHOULD NOT BE IN CONTACT WITH THIS GUY! I AM SAYING THAT IF I CAN DO IT, ANYONE CAN OVERCOME!!!
2007-05-14 04:49:31 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell your friend that if she continues to play with fire, sooner or later she will get burned...!
If she was lucky the first time, maybe she won't be the second... If this man continues to see her, she will end up in a mess and will cause heartache all around, so she should stop all contact with him.
They are BOTH married, so that means that they should work on their marriages, and not see each other anymore.
2007-05-13 11:58:53 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree 100% with Cope-.....
Since they BOTH decided to piss all over their marriages and the person they are married to, I hope they give each other the herps.
I follow a simple rule with my wife. I don't do anything that I wouldn't do if she were watching.
How about they each ask their spouses that question, and see what THEY say. Of course that would mean doing something both appear incapable of. Honesty and Respect. Adultry is the lowest form of slime.
On second thought, they deserve eachother, they should probably dump their spouses (doing them a favor) and get together, and then neither would mind when they cheat with someone else, and crap all over another person all over again...
2007-05-13 11:47:01 · answer #6 · answered by Ken C 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I've found that i can't just be friends with someone i had a relationship with unless the sex is still invovled. I think if your away from each other for a long period of time you can be friends. How is he going to work things out with his wife if he still seeing your friend? If i wasn't #1 I wouldn't be the other woman.
Hugs to your friend
2007-05-13 11:46:32 · answer #7 · answered by texasstar1974 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would not say anything this is fairly their business and nobody wish to get unsolicited advice. Simply be joyful that your pal has determined love. If she asks you your opinion then via all method in a best method communicate up. Let her comprehend that their relationship seems high-quality to you, but you wonder if they've given it ample time. Except then put a smile to your face and just be joyful for them.
2016-08-11 11:57:00 · answer #8 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Anything is possible. To remain just friends from here on out with their history, and an unpredictable future, remains questionable, especially if his marriage turns rocky again. For the sake of everyone involved I sure do hope so and wish them both lots of luck
2007-05-13 11:52:13 · answer #9 · answered by Arthur W 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
That man is what's wrong with the world - and she's no better for allowing it! They are both jeopardizing their marriages. What happened to people who commit to their marriage and see it through? Are we supposed to feel sorry for them because they can't be together while he's trying to work things out with his wife? And what about her? Is she trying to work things out with her husband.
NO THEY CAN'T BE FRIENDS!!!! It's wrong and immoral that they already went to the next level and as long as they see each other, there will always be that temptation. If they want to be together, they should have the decency to let their partners go. She needs to make him choose and she needs to choose too.
People that cheat sicken me. Then they play the sob story game where they love the other person soooo much, but they are going to do the right thing and try to work it out with their current spouse! GET YOUR PRIORITIES STRAIGHT, PEOPLE!!! You made a commitment to your partner. Stay with them, work on your marriage. If it falls apart, and only after your are properly divorced, then pursue other things....otherwise, try to honor your promises made on your wedding day!
2007-05-13 11:46:17 · answer #10 · answered by Shannon H 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Why sugarcoat it? The guy wants free lunches and the woman offers free lunches, all expenses paid for by both families. Typical TV soap operas.
2007-05-13 11:56:24 · answer #11 · answered by Sir Richard 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋