I can't put her down to play wth her toys. Will not go on her tummy, back or sitting up. She only will if I'm there with her. I am going crazy with no time to do anything else.
2007-05-11 14:13:05 · 15 answers · asked by Laura J 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
First of all, YOU CAN'T SPOIL A BABY BY HOLDING IT TOO MUCH!!! Babies need to feel securely attached to their caregiver (usually mama) and know that they will be responded to when they cry. And yes, sometimes they cry just because they want to be close to their mama. That's not spoiled!
Babies do go through periodic phases of separation anxiety. No amount of toys or training will change this. It just takes time! In the mean time, you can keep from going crazy by investing in some type of baby carrier! This way you can keep baby close - she will be the happiest, most content baby you can imagine! - and you can get on with your life and actually get something done!
I promise you - this will really, really work. It has kept me from losing my sanity during my baby's "clingy" times. You will both be happier than you have been in months!
I would recommend a "wrap" style carrier. It is the most versatile and comfortable style for an older baby. You can really wear her all day. She will LOVE just going about her day with mama.
Check out these three websites to learn more:
www.mamatoto.org
www.thebabywearer.com
www.naturalchild.org/guest/laura_simeon.html
Please seriously consider this! Don't just leave your baby to cry during a time when she really feels like she needs you close. Studies have shown again and again that babies who are "worn" fuss less and are more content in general. And I promise those mamas are happier, too, because they have happy babies!
2007-05-11 15:01:06 · answer #1 · answered by miss_honeyb 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You haven't spoilt your baby. All babies at some point go through separation anxiety. That's what clinginess is... they want to be reassured that you are there for them. They say that babies in countries where they are held all the time (in slings, etc.) are the most secure children. That is because they know their parents are there for them. This might seem counter-intuitive but pick your child up whenever she asks. Hold her until she stops complaining and then put her back down. If she cries, pick her up again. Repeat (for what seems like forever!) Eventually, she will only need a couple of cuddles for reassurance, then you put her back down. Have her in the same room as you with a few toys to play with while you work. Talk to her as you are folding laundry, doing chores, etc. - make her a part of it. Get a sling - they work wonders - helping you hold your baby while keeping your hands free for chores! You'll find over time, she won't complain when you leave her to play on her own and she won't need as much reassurance from you. The trick for me was to remember that it's not about me now, it's about my baby - if she's the priority then I don't get irritated when the chores aren't getting done as fast as they could be (or did before baby!) - you kind of mentally have to let them go (easier said than done but worth it once you've made the shift). Then again, there's also nap time for getting some stuff done!! Good Luck!
2007-05-11 22:22:06 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I hate to say it, but at this age they really do need a lot more one-on-one attention. The only time I ever got anything done during the clingy phases was during the baby's naps. Of course, there's nothing wrong with putting a baby in a safe place for a few minutes--even if she cries--while you go to the bathroom or get her food ready.
Now, sometimes I could get my babies to be quiet for a bit if I put them in the stroller and put it right next to me, so you might try that. Or try using a front baby carrier or sling--at least then you'll have your hands free. And try to remember that this is just a phase--in a few short months, she'll be pulling up and will be so excited to move around that you may want to hold her more than she wants to be held! My clingy baby boy just recently turned into a very squrimy 1-year-old who wants to get down and move on his own!
2007-05-11 21:29:58 · answer #3 · answered by veramarie32 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Babies have no concept of time, and a minute of you away from them seems like an eternity.
I try to be in eyeshot all the time with my little one .. well as much as is humanly possible...for example if i am in the kitchen the she is in her highchair with some toys on the tray, I keep talking to her and will turn around every so often and smile. I get quite a bit done through the day this way
2007-05-11 23:07:42 · answer #4 · answered by sanerstii 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is the age of separation anxiety. They don't want to be separated from mommy! It means that you have done a GOOD JOB at being mommy and now she feels safe and secure with you and she doesn't want to be separated at all. It's a completely normal phase that babies go through. It can be rough when you can't get a break, but remember this won't last forever! Just think down the road, in about 14 years she will just want to be hanging out with friends!
2007-05-11 21:33:19 · answer #5 · answered by mama06 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have a one year old that can be the same way. I have stayed home with him since the day he was born. As much as I hate to do it sometimes I just have to let him cry. Sometimes I just need the break. I make sure he is safe where he is and go outside for a few minutes. It really sucks sometimes but it was driving me nuts to have him on my hip all the time plus the fact that he weighs in at 25 pounds and my back was killing me. Good Luck!!!
2007-05-11 21:34:09 · answer #6 · answered by j_lbj 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just put her down to play in the same room where you are working. You don't have to hold her the whole time or give her your constant attention. If she fusses a little and you can see there is nothing wrong, just tell her reassuringly that your not going anywhere and then continue to do what your doing and let her alone. Once she realizes that she is not alone and your not going anywhere, she should be fine.
2007-05-11 21:23:23 · answer #7 · answered by neona807 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is going through a phase. She is still just a little baby.
Hold her and in time she will be able to be away from you more. Try her on the floor and lay next to her and play with her.
Right now she thinks that you and her are the same person.
With time she will learn to be on her own.
Enjoy your time with her, before you know it she wil be grow up and have children of her own
2007-05-11 21:58:04 · answer #8 · answered by clcalifornia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
babies are people and people are social. they like to be close to someone else almost all the time. my son gets really clingy sometimes too, but i can't always sit and play with him so I try to give him newer toys to keep him occupied on his own for a while. you don't have to keep buying new toys. just rotate them around.. put them away for a few days and bring them out again and they'll be almost like something new to them or they'll remember it and want to explore it again.
2007-05-11 21:29:36 · answer #9 · answered by blank 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My son is almost 9 months and he is still clingy. Its their way of showing that they love and need you...but i didnt spoil him when he was very young. But try to get some light up toys or if you know of anyone with other babies her age then let her play with them. I hope you figure it out.
2007-05-11 21:20:34 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋