Nosy husband?

Question

My husband checks my email and reads my journals constantly. I ask him not to especially since he likes to be snipey to my friends (while using my name) yet he keeps doing it. I change my passwords and he figures them out. He is jealous of guy friends I had in high school that I don't even see anymore (we live like 2 hours away). He just seems to be jealous and nosy. He doesn't even hide it from me, he has actually said on the phone that he was amazed I had 135 unread emails. What do I do? (No I have nothing to hide, and I'm 5 months pregnant so I couldn't really have an affair even if I wanted to)

He is a computer genius and I thought using the names of wierd cities and rivers was clever.

Romanian father not completely unfounded.

Answer 1

Your husband must be a genius if he can figure out your passwords. He is what he is. Either hide your journals better and come up with a difficult password, or understand that he's a snoop and accept it.

Answer 2

Were it not for your pregnancy, I'd advise you to leave. It's not going to get any better. His paranoia is going to be the death of your marriage. How are you going to live like this for the next umpty years? Be careful what you write (if you must) in your journals about your friends. He obviously has no qualms telling them what you wrote. You may need these friends in the future. If you ever do find a password he can't break, and there's gotta be one, it will only infuriate him and he'll be convinced you're hiding something. Maybe if your emails are light and conversational and hold nothing of real interest to a man, he'll get bored and stop nosing around them. But you won't be sure will you?
I'm sorry for the situation you're in. I understand how you must feel.
Been there, done that, out of it now and feel like I can breathe again.

Answer 3

Nosy husband?

Answer 4

I'd be inclined to ask him if it was time he grew up as he was shortly to be a father. And if not then to vacate the family home and you could look up some of these old school chums and maybe find one that had a little more faith in you and respect for you.

GET IT SORTED FAST. Better have a good understand NOW, than let it drag on. For as sure as Hookers sell Pussy you will end up with one hell of a bitter relationship.

Answer 5

This is a blatant invasion of privacy. Your husband obviously does not trust you but more importantly have you questioned him about his 135 unopened emails and his journals that he does not share with you.

You have my sympathy - I doubt he will ever get beyond this and meantime, he will make your life miserable which in turn will affect your baby. Please confront him with questions and maybe he will stop invading your privacy and give you some leeway.

If he really loves you he would not question you or read your mail and journals unless you invited him to do so.

Good luck.

Answer 6

Create a fake e-mail address and character called "Prince Yahami"....who is begging you to pack and leave America to settle in Romania and help run his pig farm. Fire e-mails away at your real account and let the husband find these. Find some picture off Flickr of Romanian farm-life and spice up the emails a bit. When he goes off the deep end.....let the little fellow down gently. The best part will be your rare comments during this period of desiring a simpler life.....on a farm. After this....he will simmer down and realize how stupid he has acted.

Answer 7

He's insecure, maybe even paranoid, and he has no respect for your privacy. See a counselor for that.

In the mean time, use better passwords. I recommend using numbers in place of vowels - 1 for i, 3 for E, 0 for o, 8 for a, etc.

Answer 8

He's insecure. Try to reassure him. But don't make it ur job. It's more to do with HIM than with you. Maybe have him go into counseling. Or tell him you can't live like this. He's wasting so much time worrying about you cheating or betraying him that he's letting time pass him by. Sit him down and talk about how he needs to respect your space. Or ask him if he wants to instill that kind of insecurity in your child. good luck! =)

Answer 9

I hope he doesnt know about me and you....you have not called him Tony by mistake have you ?
No really, he sounds like the real jealous type, he is insecure just keep being real with him, try not to hide stuff from him, cuz if he finds something out that you have not told him...he will start wondering whats really going on. Good luck With that

Answer 10

I'd say he's way out of line. As for your passwords, make them something that he couldn't guess. Pick the most complex word you can think of, totally unrelated to yourself and change a couple of the letters to numbers (ie, soph1sticat3d)