2007-05-11 03:29:57 · 22 answers · asked by olivia_brauner 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Why doesn't anybody who asks these types of questions just ask their spouse? Have you asked him?
2007-05-11 03:35:32 · answer #1 · answered by JoelMacDad 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow. You are still in the honeymoon phase. If he is not interested sexually after a couple of months that is a huge red flag. It could be several things 1) he is cheating 2) he is gay 3) he is depressed 4)he is asexual 5) you have different sex drives 6) he is an alien from mars and doesn't want to get you pregnant with martians.
Seriously, try to seduce him, have some fun...if he doesn't fall for it, say I have needs and if you can't meet them, I'm looking elsewhere.
2007-05-11 10:35:45 · answer #2 · answered by Comebackmylove 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to him about it. It's really the only way.
And to the first person: It does NOT necessarily mean he's gay. He might be. But there's no proof, so just ASK him about it.
Just don't make it sound like blame. Not "You never have sex with me!" just "I've noticed that we're never intimate. Is there anything we could work on to change that?"
At the end of the day, if he's not interested, then nor are you. But it's not the end of the day yet, you're married, you have to at least talk to him!
Good luck.
2007-05-11 10:39:09 · answer #3 · answered by Callisto 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This happened to me ... I really feel for you, darlin'. He was all hot and bothered while we were dating and almost instantly lost all interest in sex after we wed. It was a mean way to belittle and degrade me ... my self-esteem went in the toilet. I'd dress sexy and do numerous things to seduce him but he simply ignored me. I sat him down one night after about 2 1/2 years of marriage and told him I was thinking about looking for sex elsewhere even tho' I didn't want to. He didn't bat an eye lash. Does this sound like your predicament? You might ask him to go to counseling with you but I'd be willing to bet he'll refuse. I'm sorry, hon, you might as well leave this guy now. Don't waste your youth and beauty on an abuser ... and it is abuse. Bless you. Be brave.
2007-05-11 11:11:55 · answer #4 · answered by smecky809042003 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, not even six months after marriage...he is either mad or upset about something to disconnect so quickly. It could be a life trauma unrelated to you, or it could be he was really not ready for marriage and now feeling remorse and resentment at being tied down.
Best option would be to get into marriage counseling (even if he won't at first) or at minimum, ask him objectively without being accusatory what the situation is and why he doesn't want to be intimate anymore.
2007-05-11 10:37:58 · answer #5 · answered by bottleblondemama 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is something that the two of you have to discuss... marriage without a good sex life is bad. I know that sound horrible but it puts up a wall between you two!
Is this the first time that he has reacted this way to you or made you feel like he is not intrested?
It could be a number of things, but you don't want to drive yourself crazy by jumping to conclusions without talking to him!
Good luck
2007-05-11 10:36:55 · answer #6 · answered by Her 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Put a parental blocker on your computer.
Keep an eye on what he's looking at and talk to him about the behavior. Try being sexy on purpose... if he still shuns you then the problem is on his end. Perhaps you're giving him mixed signals though, so just be blunt. There's definitely no problem with telling him exactly what you want.
2007-05-11 10:36:26 · answer #7 · answered by bluebelly83 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First you need to assess what else might be going on - work, family problems/issues/money/ are you pregnant/new baby/ new house/ etc etc.
Then ask him about it in a non defensive, non angry way: "Honey I love you and I want to make sure that our marriage is really based on trusting each other. I know that you have alot on your mind with (blank - insert above) and I want you to know that you can rely on me to be there for you for support & love. I want both our emotional & physical relationship to be strong, and I need more from our physical relationship."
That might be a little too much - but don't argue with him about sex - no one wins. Perhaps negotiate a time that is good for both of you. My husband & I work alot of hours and fitting time in for each other is sometimes difficult. We added a fun idea to our relationship - every time it is raining when we come home from work we make love - it is a way to look forward to rainy days!
2007-05-11 10:49:38 · answer #8 · answered by molly 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice with the wife of your youth. As a loving deer and a graceful doe, let her breasts satisfy you at all times; and always be enraptured with her love. Pray that the very life-giving source of your husband be blessed. That God give you fresh enjoyment of each other and intimacy that reminds you of your first times when your love-making was full of wonder and excitement.
2007-05-11 10:55:19 · answer #9 · answered by God's Leading Lady 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
did you have sex before you were married? No then maybe he is waiting for you to make the first move/or he is gay. Yes then maybe he is having his pleasure somewhere else?or matbe he is gay. Why dont you just do or say SOMETHING!!! Good LUCk
2007-05-11 11:23:29 · answer #10 · answered by glasgowgone 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
agreed he could be just insecure and scared.
I only say this because I am guessing you did not have sex before marriage, who would marry someone who turns down sex??? have fun with it, he needs pulled from his shell.
or if he is foreign he may have just wanted his green card jk
2007-05-11 10:39:03 · answer #11 · answered by mike510 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋