Roommate wants to live with me, but I want to live with my boyfriend. What to do? Suggestions.?

Question

My B/F told me today that his lease will be up on July 25th and that he will finally move in with me, after 4 years of dating!!!! The problem is that I have a roommate. She moved in with me in March and already doesn't like my duplex because of the neighbors that live downstairs. She has been bugging me to set up times to look at other places because our lease is up in June and she ALREADY wants to move. I dont know if she is cool with it, it sounded like it at first, but then she said things like, "I know about this one bedroom Justin could look into, it's really cheap." She did ask me how much I really wanted to live with him, and I told her I've been waiting for a long time and yes I do really want to live with him. I do most of the cleaning and ALWAYS do the dishes, so I want to finally do it for someone who I really care about and not her. (I mean I like her and everything) I found a place for all of us, we'd each have to pay $333+utilities. She is worried about us breaking up and

being able to afford where we are living. It's a three bedroom place and I told her that if we broke up that he could move into the extra bedroom. I think she really doesn't want all of us to live together, what do I do?

Answer 1

Well if you really like this guy then do what your heart tells you to do and tell her to find her own place. But at the same time, you gotta remember, you can't live with someone else until you are ready to live by yourself.
Or maybe you 3 can find a house that has a basement suite type thing and put her down there and you and your bf can stay upstairs and then you are still living with her. But if she isn't helping out to keep the place clean, I would ge her outta there because she is only going to bring you and your bf down.
It's not ever nice to have someone else living with you when you just start living with your bf. You and him need to learn about each other and maybe being together won't work out due to privacy issues, you don't know for sure, my best advice would be to just get a place for you and bf, so hope things work out and hope this helped.

Answer 2

You should watch the original [ " Single White Female " ]


If you and your boyfriend are to make it you do not need the added stresses of a third person you need to consider before you do anything. For example, if you and he wanted to take off for the weekend you would have to let her know so she don't expect you home and get paranoid, or cook dinner for three, or make plans for the three of you to go and do whatever. No, you have to eliminate her from the mix, it is not your responsibility to concern yourself about her - she is a big girl so she'll have to accept it and move out & move on. You are not her blood sister, her protector, or her keeper.
The two of you should tell her staight out the way it is in a polite manner, and remind her she can look for another room mate to replace you.

You should also consider what about the times when he is there with her by herself and she accidentally walks out of the bathroom just wearing a towel or something to this effect, or worst yet accidentially / on purpose walks into the bathroom when he is in the shower. You must realize this whole three company will not work you are setting the stage for something to happen. You are actually providing him with the person to cheat on you with. Your concern should be your relationship, which is two people not a third.

Answer 3

Help her find another roommate. Never ever ever move a girl into the home that you and your boyfriend or husband share. You are just asking for big trouble. It is not your responsibility to make sure she has a place. Go do what you and your boyfriend want to do, and try to assist her in finding her own place. She must have done something before you and she were roommates. She will figure out a way.

She can always put an ad in the paper or local college bulletin board.

Answer 4

She might get used to it. If this is something that you have waitted for a long time and no it is going to happe then you need to go for it and tell you friend to get the cheap one bedroom for herself. I wouldn't do the cleaning and dishes all the time. She only wants to live with you because you do everything for her. She needs to take care of herself and let you get on with your life. So just come out and tell her. You don't want her there and your boyfriend. That isn't very much fun. He might be looking forward to it begin just the two of yall. Talk to him and see what he has to say.

Answer 5

1. living with a couple is never a good idea.

2. problems will arise if you 3 live together

3. suggest the option to her of finding another roommate.

if she can't find a person or another place, id say put moving in with your BF on hold. you already made a commitment to be this girl's roommate, and it would be unfair to leave her on the streets, so to speak. just find out if she can move in with someone else.

Answer 6

Been there; done that.
Did you know your roommate and consider her your friend prior to living together? If so, give her the consideration of talking it out with all 3 of you present. She sounds like a high maintenance "friend".
If neither of them know how to wash their dishes, you're gonna be in a world of hurt, girl.
Here's another fun thing to think about: Since this guy won't marry you, don't be surprised that THEY might end up in each others' arms!

Answer 7

I think that you should move in w/ B/F because ur lease is up in June and you are not required to keep living w/ ur roommate. She can find another place and another roommate. U have been w/ him for four years, I think it'll last at least another year.

Answer 8

I think that you should try to find a one bedroom for you and your man and tell your homegirl its been cool but you gotta make a move. I wouldnt suggest all 3 of you bunking together. 2's company but 3's a crowd. Your friend would just have to understand because that could weaken you and your b/f's relationship. I think yall need privacy.

Answer 9

your roomates early lease ending june is the best scape goat to get away just have to say when you move your moving alone i found a boyfriend and would invite ya but i think threes a crowd sorry. have a great life best of luck

Answer 10

i suppose the best way is the old way sit down with her and discuss the matter, tell her that you and you bf is planning to move in together and that its best if she can find another room mate. It wont be very comfi if she stays with you as there will no private time for you and your bf. If she realy is your friend she will understand and she will put your intrest before hers, but remember to give her enough notice . Good luck and enjoy staying with your bf its going to be fun