Can you forgive cheating in a marriage, or is that grounds for divorce? What will be the consequence of staying? How will staying affect the other areas of your life and HOW do you forgive and move on?
2007-05-09 18:38:06 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I think this would depend on the person themselves if they could forgive cheating . i personally could not forgive it . but that's just how i feel about cheating . if you think or know in your heart you can not forgive him then why put yourself and him Thor more misery . you will forever be doubtful about him and the trust will never be there again. ask yourself do you want to live the rest of your life with someone you can never trust again .
2007-05-09 19:17:34 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋
Very hard question because everyone is different. We all heal differently. But you must first start with truthfully asking yourself do you think you can forgive and forget. If not then you need to move on because it is very good grounds for divorce. But if you believe that you maybe able to forgive then you just need to take things slow until you feel comfortable with things. There is no magic cure to help some one forgive. You must figure out what you want from your partner in order to be able to regain your trust. I don't believe that the long term of staying will have any affect on anything unless you stay and do not forgive. If you stay and haven't forgave then you both are destined for a long miserable time with each other and cheating will more than likely be an issue again in the future.
2007-05-09 19:38:42 · answer #2 · answered by Kristy T 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well.. both has to understand the reasons WHY they are married in the first place.
If they understand the long term goal, then they will also understand that both need to maintain the marriage and sometimes one partner may get out of line just for one night stand that kind of thing. Then I think good traits that keep the marriage going are, PATIENCE, TOLERANCE, HONEST, SINCERITY and FORGIVENESS...
So if one spouse cheat, I think if you look at the long term goal as a family. It is important to forgive the one you love and to carry on with the relationship knowing the fact that both has to work alot harder to keep the marriage going. However if this is done repeatedly, then I think it is OBVIOUS that the other party wants out of the relationship. In that case, there is no point in continuing the relationship.
Staying together again after one party cheated... and if truely repented can bring marriage to a higher level of happiness actually. Because both will treasure each other existence.
To forgive, you would really need to forget about the past and move on. NEVER EVER to bring out again when you have a small tiff and argument. Just accept that it is history and ni amount of things that you can do to change history. SO let it remain in the past and move on...
take care
2007-05-09 20:17:43 · answer #3 · answered by trymejames 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I couldn't. It varies from person to person, but cheating, drug use, and abuse, are the things I have no tolerance for.
Legal grounds? In the US, most states are "no fault".. meaning you don't need reasons for the divorce other than "I want out". In places which do require "grounds", infidelity is one of the top ones.
Consequences..unless you're a total schmuck, you're probably not going to have much trust in the cheater. Trust is very hard to rebuild. Without trust, love rapidly spirals down into something not very attractive, until it disappears.
You can become depressed, and that will impact everything and everyone around you.
The person who cheated has to work on proving themselves to be trustworthy. That means they have to be total open, and open themselves up for questions and suspicion until the cheated on accepts they've stopped.
Personally, I wouldn't forget, but I'd stop caring, which is as close to forgiveness as I come on this topic. Mainly, I'd just move on, and NOT with the cheater.
2007-05-09 22:42:09 · answer #4 · answered by Kaia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes you can. However, two things must happen:
* The person who cheated must apologize and work to earn his/her wife/husband's trust again.
* The one who is cheated on must FORGIVE and must allow the wife/husband to earn his/her trust back. Once that happens, the couple should move forward and work to keep the marriage strong. The one who was cheated on cannot hold on to the anger and pain forever.
If neither can be done, then the marriage is pretty much doomed.
2007-05-09 19:25:14 · answer #5 · answered by brotherb95 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
i dont think i could forgive im not married yet but i have seen what it can do to a family not just a couple it can destroy everything im not a forgiving person so it would be divorce
2007-05-09 20:24:22 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Nope. He/She did it once and will do it again. He/she should of stopped him/her self before doing so. You should be his/her one and only that's why you married each other!!
2007-05-09 20:14:47 · answer #7 · answered by ADA T 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋