Is it ok to date 2 guys, but fool around with only 1?

Question

Is it ok to date 2 guys, but fool around with only 1?
They dont know about each other and neither one asked for exclusivity.

Answer 1

Listen to your heart. If it feels wrong to you, it is. If it doesn't, it isn't. The fact that you're asking the question leads me to think you're feeling guilty about it...

As long as you're just dating them casually, you can date as many people as you like. Don't deceive them however. If each one thinks you're exclusive it isn't fair to mislead them. They may be falling for you.

For myself, once I've become intimate with someone, it is an exclusive relationship & I wouldn't date anyone else. If I hadn't done anything physically with them though, then there's nothing wrong with going out to dinner with one, movies with another etc & a goodnight kiss is ok. But once it goes further & gets more serious, then you have to evaluate whether you're just "dating" or is it a relationship.

This of course is only my opinion! It's very subjective. Some people see nothing wrong with sleeping with several people at the same time. I don't believe in casual sex. To me, there has to be love involved but I'm old-fashioned & was brought up on Catholic guilt so that's just me! I think sex is too meaningful an expression to be treated lightly (even though there were times in my life I was tempted). I couldn't cheapen myself that way.

Anyway, good luck. I say, decide who you like better & stick with them. But if you're young & don't know what you're looking for, date as many people as you like until you find the right one. When you find the right one, you will want to be exclusive because you wouldn't want anyone else.

Take care.

:)

Answer 2

Questions like this make me realize I'm not amoral afterall.

No body wants to be played like that. Its a crappy thing to do to a person - even if he doesn't know you are doing it. So just don't do it. If you are dating a guy - you are giving him an intention of romance , not innocent hanging out or palling around. He thinks there is a real opportunity between you two and you are knocking boots with someone else. It really bothers me that so many women see no problem with this. In my mind, it shows extemely low moral character to fake romance with people.

Answer 3

You know, my girlfriend did this same thing to me with another guy, when i found out she apologized till she couldn't cry anymore, ofcourse i didn't forgive her. I just can't believe you're actually asking this as if there were more than one option. You're playing with two people that don't deserve it. Like someone up there said "how would you feel if you were in the same situation?" I hope you get dumped and trampled over by them as soon as they find out. Enjoy it till it lasts.

Answer 4

as long as you don't give them the idea that there is exclusivity..

if you're ever not sure, put yourself in their position. How would you feel if you were in their situation? That will tell you what the right thing to do is.. and the right thing is not always the easy thing. Don't play games.

-Guru

Answer 5

I am going to tell you what you don't want to hear. No, it is not okay. Where is the trust, love, commitment or fidelity in the relationship? You will be happier if you wait to find someone you really care about--someone who is a decent man--and marry that person before giving up the goods.

Answer 6

THIS IS OK ,AS LONG AS THERE IS NO COMMITMENT.NOW MOST PEOPLE MAY SEE THINGS DIFFERENTLY,BUT I WOULD PROBABLY BE FOOLING AROUND WITH BOTH ALSO.SAFE SEX AND COMPARE NOTES ,I NEED TO KNOW WHICH ONE TO HOLD ON TOO IFI NEED TO CHOOSE 1 OF THEM.IF THERE IS NO COMMITMENT ITS ABOUT SEX ,SO YOU MAY AS WELL HAVE THE BEST ONE.

Answer 7

Sure! If you seek to confuse yourself and convince yourself that it is as you say, then go right on ahead....... In the end, you will most likely choose neither because there will be no satisfaction.... you will always see that elusive "one".......

your sister,
Ginger

Answer 8

I wouldn't trust you.

When you withhold information from someone, you take away their ability to make choices for themselves.

Bad form in my view.

Or, as a friend's mother used to say "how you find your man is how you will lose him."

Answer 9

yes. its fine. don't listen to the haters.

oh yea, about your question, it would be good to make sure that neither one has the kind of temper in which he would do something crazy if he found out.

Answer 10

If each is fine with the status quo, why not?