How do I get my wife's respect?

Question

I've been married for 3 years and I don't have my wife's respect. She's told me she respects me but I'm positive she doesn't.

One thing that bothers me is that when she talks about other men in her life, her father, her brother, etc. she has a different tone...a respectful tone. Now maybe when she's speaking of me in front of THEM it's the same way, but I don't see it.

I want to be able to stand up to my wife. i want to be able to say something and for once hear her say "OK" without there being 100 conditions.

Any books, or websites I can go to or buy would be greatly appreciated. Thank you.

Answer 1

The Proper Care & Feeding of Husbands by Dr. Laura Schlessinger...
i bought it online for like 5 bucks, and now see that i was such a ***** to my husband. hes great and i love him like crazy.. good luck!!

Answer 2

I know you are frustrated and I sympathize with you, but as bad as I hate to say it you have probably trained her to act this way. People learn how to treat you within a short time of interacting with you, and once that pattern is set it is hard to change. If you don't feel like you can talk to her and be her peer and not her project then you guys are doomed anyway. Most of the time though we focus on the bad side of a personality and not the good. You said she gives you "conditions" when she answers you. Sounds like she's probably a natural leader and she sets up healthy boundaries around her. I'm sure in a lot of areas she takes care of you and the workings of the household, but once she's in a groove it's hard to move her. If she has a compassionate heart and you will approach this the right way there is hope. If not you need chalk this one up, learn from your mistakes, and move on.

Answer 3

to be honest with you, take this into consideration.

1. Do both of you have children?
2. How offen you two have sex per week & how many time during the sex night.
3. are you statisfied her with your big/small ding dong.
4. is she having another man inside her that you don't know, but just supicious.
5. how much do you make per week or twice a week?

Take the above into consideration,,,,if you did the right thing and you are the man then you are perfect for any housewife. She should respect you,,if not it time to move on.

Answer 4

There is no way to get Respect Immediately. However you can train her to give you respect if you kill her with respect and kindness. Show her you can be trusted and follow thru on what you say.

Help her respect you.

What it comes down to is women need your attention. They need to feel protected, appreciated,loved, and desired. They need to feel that you have there best intrest in mind. They need to feel safe to be soft and girly. They need a man. They need a a trust worthy man that commands respect. Other wise you get a woman who turn into your nagging mommy. So grow up little boy and be a man. If you can pull this off your “nagging mommy” will turn into a woman who adores you , respects you, and worships the ground you walk on.

In the mean while, If she yells at you disrepectfully say…. I understand that you are upset and you have a need that needs to be met. I want to hear you and understand how I can help you. However, you are yelling at me and treating me with disrespect. I am going for a walk now. I will give you time to clam down so that you may discuss what you need from me in a rational and productive manor. I will return in twenty to thirty minutes.

When you return hopefully she will have learned she needs to address her needs in a respectfull manor if she wants you to listen. Then return and be ready to listen. Encourage her to discuss how she feels and what she wants without saying hurtfull ego slashing things. Listen untill she if finished and then responed by asking her questions about what she just said to make sure you truely understand what it is she needs.

If she continues to belittles you. Let her know that the hurtfull thing she said is not productive in getting her needs met. Do not say a hurtfull things back as that only brings you down to her level and does not help the situation.

Love , patience, self worth, and being the bigger person will help her to be the respectfull woman you deserve.

This also may help…

If you notice your woman being stressed or less tolerant of your behavior suggest she do something for herself. Dinner with the girls, a nap, a bath, read a book, ect….
Maybe after she distressess she will realize that she was not mad at you at all, but angry at all the responsibilties she thinks she has to do alone. And due to this sense of urgency to accomplish daily never ending tasks-she forgot to take care of herself. Encourage good self care of your woman. She will thank you for it and you will be the big hero. ( and why not load the dishwasher or throw a load of dirty cloths in the washer while you at it). Take initiative to take away one of her burdens. All a sudden she may find you so manly and attractive. There may be sex in it for you.

Answer 5

You need to be decisive and take charge of things. She probably had that growing up with her dad and brother, and maybe feels she can walk all over you. Put your foot down and tell her like is. She's respect you much more if you are not wishy washy and have a command on things. If that doesn't work, then it could be a personality conflict.

Answer 6

Your wife chose you to be her husband.
She chose to date you.
She chose to go out with you.

Learn to just say "No".

Learn how to have fun on your own.
If you are able to make yourself happy you will appear stronger.

The stronger you are as a person the more confident you are as a man.

Its not 50/50 if you are letting her control everything.

If you say something and she tries to put conditions on it just say "yeah" but don't pay attention to what she says.

If she questions your judgement just say you did what you thought was best at the time and you stand by your decision.
Tell her you already expected something would have to be changed.

Answer 7

Someone gave my husband the book "Getting to Yes." I know it is a business book, but it sounds like a helpful subject.

Answer 8

All I can say is good luck. I have been trying for 4 years. So I dont know what to say. Its hard to get that.

Answer 9

If she doesn't respect you then why did you marry her? If you're not doing anything do deserve this disrespect then you need to move on. You can't force her to respect you.

Answer 10

well u could be imaging this 'tone' you speak off.


if on the offchance ur not grow some balls and put ur foot down