We are seperated and he wont talk to me anymore. But i'm 4 months pregnant and of course want him to be in the babies life So should I just leave messages everytime I find something new..Like on the 30 th I find out if its a boy or girl, the first kick. Or should I just let him be? He said he wanted to be in this babies life..Clueless.
2007-05-09 08:42:24 · 18 answers · asked by ERICKSMAMA 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Yes, you should tell him everything. My husband and i went through a similar problem, we were sperated during most of my prgnancy, but he still wanted to do the fatherly things like put the crib together etc... So I let him, and this helped us to get to talk and we talked things through and we are now back together and have been for a while. We are stonger than ever and our daughter is 17m and very happy.
2007-05-09 08:50:18 · answer #1 · answered by sarcastic 3 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Yes you should. As the babies father he has rights. Also it is better to be the 'better person' even if it hurts or is hard to do sometimes. Someday your child may thank you for it. In the end he will either be there or not, but you won't be able to say you didn't try. Also, if you ever end up in court you will have this to back you up.
Are you in touch with any of his family? If he won't talk to you at least you can let them know. I also like the book idea. And although I think you should contact him...maybe not for the little thinks like the kick.
Hope everything works out for you.
2007-05-09 18:25:14 · answer #2 · answered by Sassafrass 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would that way you know you did the best you could. If he chooses not to respond then so be it. I would only do it for the most important things. Kicking, no, most men don't have a clue about how that makes us feel. Let him know the progress and the sex of it and tell him in one of the messages to feel free to call you and you will talk to him about what is going on, this way it does leave the door open for him.
2007-05-09 20:25:38 · answer #3 · answered by Krinta 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would let him call you. When you constantly call him w/ information it's more like begging that giving information. It the hoser really cared he would right by your side loving on you. He is missing out, I'm telling you. Prego women are the greatest. Look you need to let him come to you. Don't call. Maybe write things in a book like someone else suggested. Like you said. Let him be. When he starts missing some of these important moments, it will start to add up in his brain that he is going to lose you and that fact is going to make him act. Not you calling him all the time begging him to be in your life....Relax.....He come back (hopefully), if he's got any brains whatsoever, he'll come back. I'm no expert. but that's just how I see it.
2007-05-09 18:06:21 · answer #4 · answered by prouddaddy 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If this man wants to be a part of this chld's life, allow him to make the first move. All that you must do is keep a diary for him and when and if he decides to come around, you'll have this information for him. If he doesn't come around, you'll have an extra diary to give to the baby when he/she turns 18.
In the diary, write down the baby's sex, the first time you felt the baby kick and how it felt. Write down the foods that makes the baby kick alot. Write down the times you think the baby sleeps. Write down all the special moments that the baby does.
If he will not talk with you right now, it is not a good thing for your to pressure him. Allow him time to get over whatever he needs to get over. In the meantime you keep focuses on birthing a healty happy baby.
2007-05-09 15:51:37 · answer #5 · answered by lwheavenlyangel 4 · 3⤊ 1⤋
If you truly believe he wants to be a part of the baby's life then you should call him after your next doctors appointment and just say, I went to the doctors today and this is what they said about the baby. Then ask him if he would like you to call him after your next appointment. That way you don't keep calling if he doesn't care. You don't want to waste your time if he could care less. So really just ask him.
2007-05-09 15:49:44 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
tell him when your next appointment is and ask if he would like to be there to find out if he will have a son or a daughter .if he comes great then he is intrested if not stop calling. you cannot force him to be a daddy.its not fair to him or the baby.if you dont chase him down with info he might actually call you because he may decide he wants to know.you cannot force this! good luck.
2007-05-09 16:12:40 · answer #7 · answered by dixie58 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'd give him one last call. Let him know that you are finding out the sex on the 30th and if he'd like to know, he can call you.
If he calls, let him know that from now on you will be only updating him if something major happens, otherwise, he needs to call you if he wants information.
His interest now will be an indicator of his interest in his child in the future.
I'm sorry you are having to go through this without him.
Stay strong!
2007-05-09 15:50:05 · answer #8 · answered by nailgal2005 3 · 3⤊ 1⤋
How does he respond back to you, does he act like he wants to know or does he not even call you back? If he doesn't call you back or doesn't act like he cares then I would only call and tell him on the "major" things, like sex of the baby, if there is any complications, due date & when you have the baby. If he wants to know anything else he knows your number, he can call you!!
2007-05-09 15:48:32 · answer #9 · answered by Kerri L 2 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Even if you are not together, why not invite him to your doctor's visits? This will likely open the lines of communication, and you can be excited about your child together. There will many times in the child's life that s/he will want you both there so share her/his excitement. Involve Dad now and it will he will bond better with the child as he gets excited about new milestones.
2007-05-09 15:47:09 · answer #10 · answered by Tangled Web 5 · 2⤊ 2⤋