I want to file for a divorce - we have two kids, what is the best way to handle the procedure without it turning too ugly. Also I live in the state of california are there any penelties if someone committed audultery? Also how long does a divorce take for it to be final? what steps can I take to prepare myself for this emotional ordeal?
Thanks so much for your answers
2007-05-09 07:10:09 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If you and your husband are in agreement, and there are no issues to argue over with the custody of your children then contact a mediator. They will be able to help you out with the paperwork and talks with your husband. Since you are bringing up the adultery, then it doesn’t sound like you want to play nice. Get a good lawyer.
The first form you need to fill out can be found at http://www.courtinfo.ca.gov/forms/fillable/fl170.pdf You can find just about everything you need at the www.courtinfo.ca.gov website.
2007-05-09 07:27:46 · answer #1 · answered by Robin C 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have been divorced more than once and it should be avoided at all costs. I, at 42 and male, was awarded custody of a 2 and 4 yr old. BUT, every effort should be made to avoid divorce. You should forgive and accept, forget and overlook, let go and remember no more. Divorce is were you finally say, 'I have failed and that's okay with me'. I would not for anything wish to be back in the relationships I walked away from, but I would not want some of the cars I have wrecked back either. The fact still remains, I wrecked the cars. Relationships are work and work involves failure and defeat sometimes. Divorced is best handled by realizing it is the final act of desperate people. I got out of a very, very violent relationship (her, not me) 12 years ago, and I still wonder if I could have done something else to have helped her.
Even though you are hurting and feel deceived, try to be the best 'person' you can be through the process and you will have less regrets later when life rights itself.
2007-05-09 07:26:11 · answer #2 · answered by Tazz in TEXAS 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In California there are only two reasons for divorce "Irreconcilable Differences" and "Insanity". It doesn't matter, at all, if one party committed adultery or not. It's not important to the court and the judge.
As soon as issue of child custody and child support come up, it WILL turn ugly. There's no way to avoid it. The problem is that what is best for the children is to live with both parents who love and care for them. As soon as this is broken, then what is next best for the children is for them to live 95% with one parent and 5% with the other ... are you going to be the 95% or the 5%? the law says it has to be 50-50. And who is going to pay for the children, child support, etc.?
I've been through this in California, and it is awful, no way around it.
2007-05-09 07:14:17 · answer #3 · answered by John B 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know about the state you live in, but divorce is difficult even when the two parents are trying to be civil. You are getting ready to turn your kids life upside down, so expect there to be a lot of heartache on their part. Never talk poorly about your soon to be ex, if he's a good Dad, then do all you can to promote their relationship. Don't move out of state, stay close so that your kids can have their Dad. You can't control him, so it could turn ugly no matter what you do or say.
2007-05-09 07:15:48 · answer #4 · answered by reddevilbloodymary 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you both agree to divorce you can get it done in several weeks. The best thing to do is find a resource that will help you get started.
2007-05-09 16:18:09 · answer #5 · answered by dorwin29 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe you asked this same question b-4, Truth your not ready for divorce, you don't have a clear conscience,don't do it!
2007-05-09 07:16:37 · answer #6 · answered by fstmx 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋