2007-05-09 05:30:15 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
My girls are 4 and 7. I guess what sets me up every year is when he says "What are we doing for my Mom for Mothers Day?", not "What would you like to do for Mothers Day?".
2007-05-09 05:50:44 · update #1
That is a hard one. Every day you put yourself last, taking care of kids and husband. Mother's day is supposed to be the day that your family reckognizes your hard work. I would hope that your husband might be able to make it special for you, and maybe include his mom for a part of the day, such as lunch or dinner, but not the whole day. After all, she's had a lifetime of Mother's days when he was a boy, its your turn now.
2007-05-09 05:45:31 · answer #1 · answered by twosey ♥ 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
That's a fine line, I think most families probably struggle with.
Even though you want Mother's Day to be a day just for you since the holiday has a lot of meaning for you now that you are a mother of 2 small children, the fact is that your Mother-In-Law feels the same way about her day with her son, made even more special with your children, her grand children being present.
How about you compromise and have a special breakfast with just your husband and kids and celebrate you at that time, and then maybe spend the afternoon with your husband's mom just to celebrate and honor her.
2007-05-09 12:45:00 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Possibly a little. You don't mention how you're being asked to share the day, so it's hard to say. But your mother-in-law is still a mother as well and she's the woman who raised the man you're with. So she does deserve aknowledgement on Mother's Day as well. It may be a little late to do this, but talk to your husband about what's being planned and make sure there's enough being done to make both of you feel special and loved.
2007-05-09 12:37:12 · answer #3 · answered by Demon 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I can understand, but also this is his Mother. Can't you two come to some kind of agreement like taking Mom out to lunch and then the rest of the day for you. Selfish, no and yes. We can't forget why he is here and that is because of her. Hope you can work this out so he doesn't feel in the middle of such a important holiday.
2007-05-09 12:39:02 · answer #4 · answered by Krinta 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes. Plan to spend some time with her, then the rest of the day with your children and husband. I'm guessing here your mom is gone, but you'll be thinking of her as well...
2007-05-09 13:24:57 · answer #5 · answered by Lydia 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Yes and no. As a mother, you would like to be with YOUR family, but remember that without her, you would have no family (at least not the one you have now) Judging by your nickname, you share yourself with many people every day. There will come a time when he will not be able to share time with his mother, and then you will be the only one. Please don't begrudge him the time he has with his mother, celebrate with him while you celebrate with your entire family.
2007-05-09 12:40:24 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Yes it is selfish. Mother's Day is not Your celebration but the celebration of all the mothers. When you're older and your children are gone from home it's even more important for you to get their visits on Mother's Day. In my family we invite Moms on both sides, sisters, sisters-in-law, everyone who's a Mother and wants to celebrate with us is welcome. It's NOT about me! it's about Motherhood.
2007-05-09 12:44:51 · answer #7 · answered by Jane Marple 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
If he wants to go and see her fine, let him bring her a card and flowers, but you are the mother of his children, so he should make sure you have a special day with him and the kids.
he should make sure they buy a card for you and flowers and have a nice supper you don't have to cook.
He visits his mom, you don't, she is not your mom, and then he comes home to be with you.
No, you are not being selfish... she is not your mom.....
2007-05-09 12:41:14 · answer #8 · answered by doclakewrite 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have two boys myself.
We are spending Mother's Day with his mom too. No, it doesn't bother me.
Be the bigger person....God willing, you will have many more Mother's Day's to celebrate than she will. When YOUR kids are grown, YOU will want to see THEM on Mother's Day...would you like their spouses being all pouty about it??!
2007-05-09 12:35:53 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
you shouldn't expect him not to do anything for his mother because you're selfish. Would you want your kids to do that to you when they're married? Get over yourself and grow up! She gave him life and cared for him a lot longer than you've even known him. So in answer to your question you are being selfish.
2007-05-09 12:35:37 · answer #10 · answered by #1 Lucy Fan 4 · 2⤊ 2⤋