how would you feel? Would you allow her to be in contact with her ex-boyfriends, by phone, text or msn?
2007-05-09 05:30:06 · 58 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
How many different ways can I say No - first you may want to rethink the whole relationship altogether. Based on the numbers above you have 102% chance this relationship wont go past 9 months. Just an FYI.
2007-05-09 05:33:38 · answer #1 · answered by Justice 2 · 3⤊ 1⤋
"allow" her? You sound like your trying to be her parent. You should tell her if it makes you uncomfortable, be honest with her and if she refuses to comply than it seems to me that she has made the decision that they are more important than you. And if she's had sex with that many men has she really had time to have Boyfriends? Or are they just f*ck buddies? This gives an indication that she's not into having real relationships, and might very well have low self esteem. I'd be concerned that she does not know how to have a real relationship and focuses too much on the sexual aspect of a relationship rather than the more important things (I'm not implying sex isn't important). Feel? I'd be suspicious and distrustful. Seems like she's keeping her options open. Do? I would never say that someone couldn't see or talk to old flames but I would be clear that it made me feel uncomfortable (if it did) if it was happening all the time and in a secretive manner. * I would not go so far as to say she's a whore cause that is only 3 a year if she started at age 16... Its all in perspective I guess.
2016-05-19 00:21:14 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How would I feel?
I guess it depends. Does flirting turn her on and make lovemaking extra wild and enhance your time together, or does it just make you feel insignificant knowing that vying for your attention alone is not enough for her. This is some complicated stuff, but I think you have to approach it from that angle - pro vs. con on the flirting. As to having had sex with the 30 guys by age 26, I guess that's not a monstrous amount, and I'm sure any 26 year old guy would be quite proud of the fact that he was with that many woman, and would like for it to be a whole lot more. So on that point, I think you have to come to terms with the double standard and decide for yourself. I guess I'm wondering whether she ever had a long term committed relationship, at least a few years or something like that. This would be important to me to know to determine whether there is some deep seated insecurity problem there or not.
As to would I allow her to be in contact with her ex'es, unlike the feminist and haters, I know the context you were asking this in, and the answer is again somewhat complicated.
And again, it comes down to, why is she wanting to stay in touch with these guys, and what's in it for you. You need to weigh the pro's and con's, and if you are more unhappy than happy about it, then you are going to have to decide whether she wants the "discipline" from you of telling her it's not going to work if she needs to do this, or whether you're prepared to have her tell you to go blow if you want her to stop it.
Good luck, man, I hope it's worth it. She would definitely have to be smokin' hot and a lot of excitement to put up with all that complication as far as I'm concerned.
2007-05-09 06:00:00 · answer #3 · answered by inquisitor-one 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If i understand what you are saying is that those 30 guys were before you had your relationship. rigth?
Then you shouldn't even ask, she can have friends, and if those ex-boyfriends are just friends i don't see why you think you can forbide her to be intouch.
Are you sure about what you two have? Is there a problem with you that she have had sex with her boyfriends before, then you shouldn't be with her.
I mean, when you are inside a relationship, whatever happened before, becomes the past and you are the present, shouldn't worry too much, and you shouldn't even talk about it, that's her past.
And you should have self confidence, and trust in her, if you really want something serious.
Altougth, if she have given you something to think bad, and that really makes you feel you cannot trust her, then you cannot be inside that kind of relationship.
There is no place for love, when you have doubts and jealosy.
2007-05-09 05:43:09 · answer #4 · answered by Popocatepetl 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Easy Fella... it's not the fact she has slept with 30 guys, there's a lot worse out there. It's the fact she wants to keep in contact with e-boyfriends and likes to flirt that has me worried. If you can't be up front and tell her what you want out of a relationship and she can't respect that then get out now... Things will soon so south anyways.
Now if she can respect your feelings, than don't let her "experience" in bed bother you; as a matter a fact, she may teach you a few things! Just be safe until you are sure she isn't dirty... if you know what I mean.
Hope things work out.
2007-05-09 05:41:58 · answer #5 · answered by rah 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
All you can do is either get over it or talk to her and tell her that it bothers you that she keeps in contact with all her exs. only do that if this is a serious relationship though. And at any point she may either think you are controling or you do not trust her...I have been in this situation and let me tell you...it was best that I didn not have contact with my exs. An ex is an Ex for a reason...unless you have kids together, why keep in touch?? Good luck!
2007-05-09 05:36:05 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why would you be in a relationship with someone like this? Her need to text and stay in contact is showing you she will always have the need to have other men in her life. Does the fact she was with 30 other guys turn you on? That is just gross.
2007-05-09 05:33:46 · answer #7 · answered by Sparkles 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
NO, if she told u 30 you have to mulity it by 3 so it's really 90, and if she can't cut off ur x's, then she still has feeling for them, trust me on this one she has to ether comitte to u 100% with out talking to her x's or u need to start ur seach for a new girlfriend and by the way is she cute enogh to marry with 30-90 ***** on ur mind like, what the **** would u tell your children ur mom was a whore???
2007-05-09 05:37:26 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Actually, if she admitted to 30 she has probably been with more guys than that. The general rule of thumb is how ever many guys she says she has been with, you have to multiply that by 2. How ever many girls a guy says he has been with, you have to divide that by 2. If you are the jealous type, you shouldnt be with an outgoing girl like that. More than likely she is sleeping around on you, just because she thinks it is a fun thing to do.
2007-05-09 05:37:58 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
If it was 30 guys before you, then you should not be with her anymore. Sorry but this is the Truth. If you stay with her, you could get a Desise (STDs, etc.). You can still be Friends with her by phone, e-mail, IM, etc, but not in person, such as, living with her. This info is by commen knollege not by experience. That's for fist part of question.
Now for part 2...
How would I feel? I would feel bad. very bad. I would probaley. let her contact her ex-boyfriends (as long as they don't plot to get me...). So that's for part 2 of your question.
For more Info, Contact Me.
Thank You.
:)
Ricardo (Ricardo7)
2007-05-09 05:44:52 · answer #10 · answered by Ricardo7 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋