To the ladies and men,Have you ever felt your Mr/Mrs Right is actually a wrong choice of yours AFTER marriage?

Question

Coz i am feeling now after 8 months of marriage life...
Now i am feeling that the choice i picked WHO is my hubby is absoultly the wrong one!! Why am i so stupid or was i blind then? What Should i do?

Answer 1

Don't worry sweetheart, 90% of the married population feels the same way.. Hehehehe..
Actually, its not about choosing the perfect (which we term "the right one") partner. Its being the perfect partner for your husband. You two have not been married just because. God knows that a part of you needs a person like him, so you will become stronger and wiser.
This is the catch: you do not love just to please yourself (or marry to please yourself and yourself alone). Because if you do so, then it is not love. It is selfishness. And what you did all those past years can be termed as "investing" since you expect a worthy return of your investment.
Now, you say that you married the wrong guy. This is precisely the reason why a very long engagement is encouraged. (although not even a long engagement will reveal to you everything about your husband-to-be, at least it will show you something more). And marriage can only happen betwen two ADULTs.. now, why did i say two adults? because only adults are mature enough to accept both the good and bad things in their life and make the most of what is in their hands. They will try to work things out no matter what.. Even if divorce is already knocking on their door. and my goodness, you haven't even surpassed the first year and you sound like u already wanna quit!
Reassess yourself and your true feelings for him. Do you really love him? or you just love him because you thought he was like this and that? (in this case, you don't love him, you loved your self-made image of him and fell in love with that).
What makes you say that he is Mr. Wrong? Is it because he cannot please you or he cannot give what you want, and you're disappointed?
honey, love is as love does. You cannot say you love a person when you are not willing to try your best in working things out. Try to stay together. you got all the time in the world to talk about "the two of you and yourlife together."
You got married, whole-heartedly went to an officiating person and made your vows, therefore, fulfill it. Through life's blessings and life's curse, for better or worse..
God Bless the two of you.

Answer 2

I made a very poor choice in letting innocent flirting go too far. Nothing happened sexually, just a kiss, but I’m married therefore none of that should have even happened to begin with. My reasons for letting it go further are pretty stupid. Because this other man filled a void that my husband did not. On an emotional level. Again, it doesn’t make a difference what the reason was because it shouldn’t have happened anyways. My husband IS a good man. He takes care of me for the most part, we have a beautiful son together and I have “inherited” a very sweet stepdaughter. But lately my husband has been making very selfish decision and leaving me home alone and I suppose that’s what pushed me to this other man. All in all, it was still my choice and I still made the wrong choice, but it happened. I never told my husband because I don’t know how he’ll react. If it had gone further than a kiss, I’d feel obligated to tell him. In my family, nobody cheats. It’s unheard of. You stand by your spouse, you take care of your spouse and he to you, cheating just doesn’t happen in our families. So this is very embarrassing for me, I’m pretty ashamed of it, and my guilt gets the best of me quite often. I talked to a close friend about it and that was it. I got it out of my system and told a person. And from this point forward, I will not put myself in a situation like that ever again. I will not ever allow things to happen in the event I am in a situation like that again. Because if I was to turn the tables and this was happening to me, I’d be crushed. So I try to know that my husband would be also and it reminds me day after day why I’m with a good man and why this is where I belong. I’ve basically made peace with it and I’m not looking back. And I’m just trying to be the best wife and mother I can be. But the guilt of what happened, will never go away. At least not for me.

Answer 3

After 7 yrs of marriage life i ever did think also my choice is wrong you know. Some situation everyone we do think this way. But we keep going with the same guy. Yours is different case just 8 months want to change means change him right now. Later after you get a kid then its diffifcult to take decision.

Answer 4

I felt that way a few times. It's been two years and I'm very happy now. My mother was married into a very difficult situation. She should've left but she didn't because she knew that she got married for a reason. You have good times and **** times if everyone gave up during the **** times things would not be easy. Maybe you need to figure out what you are doing that isnt working. My husband and I talk alot abut everything how we feel about this how we feel about that what we need and what we don't.

Answer 5

Oh yes! I knew within a few months after I married my first husband that I had made a HUGE mistake! But I continued to stay and that was the worse thing I could have done. We ended up having children together and it made divorce and leaving that much harder. If you're unhappy, do something about it. If you truly aren't in love with him and feel you made a mistake, get out before it goes any further.

Answer 6

It happens to many of us, don't feel alone. Just make it a clean break, be kind (because in bitter divorces sometimes violence rears its ugly head.) Be clear, leave no doubt. My husband did an about face within the first 2 hours of our marriage, and became violent, which I had never seen in the 2 years before we married, by the 20th hour. Then I tried to change him. Oh no, doesn't work.

Answer 7

stick it out because it is only 8 month you guys are getting to know each other and the frist years are always tough
by the way from experience the only mrs right is you
I was married & divorce get remaried after 4 years
although my new husband is great we travel and I literally can spend and do anything I want
but still I swear sometimed that I was happier when I was on my own
please give your marriage a chance after all it is only 8th
months you must have seen something good in him to have gotten marry to him
Good luck

Answer 8

There were 2 times I almost got married and it would have been the wrong choice...the one I did marry was definitely the right one. A true soulmate.

Answer 9

I did this too. It sucks. Your better off leaving him before you do something silly, like cheat. Its really hard but you'll get through. Good luck.