my husband and I have been together for almost four years we just bought a new house in September ..and noticed a great change in his personality he was treating me very disrespectful I thought it was the stress of everything then I noticed on the computer that we share that he had been deleting his history and I just wonder why .I never said anything to him ...when one day I was checking send mail and found an e-mail from another woman he claims he knew nothing about it but it was addressed to him ...in the e-mail he asked her to lunch, the e-mail was dated November 6 he Started a new job on that date ..,he said they never went to lunch I don't know whether to believe him or not ....he denied the whole thing saying that someone set him up but that wasn't possible there was three emails one writing to her and then her answering and then him asking her to lunch ....I don't feel I can trust him now ......I never believed that he would do something like this
2007-05-08 13:19:10 · 18 answers · asked by Just me 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
he said he was going to a chat room , I have no clue how long he has been doing this ...I thought that trust was one thing we had ..I'm totally devastated .I don't think I'll ever get over this there are so many things I don't know but I never had a reason to not trust him .I gave him my heart completely .I know it sounds like I'm not in the real world but even when I told my best friend she said she didn't think he would do something like this it seems so out of character I feel like our whole relationship has been lie
2007-05-08 14:00:40 · update #1
First I'm sorry you are feeling this, it brings back hurtful memories for me. You have been betrayed, you are right to be angry. You don't have to trust him. He has pursued a relationship...no matter the context...a relationship with another woman. You need to find out what it is that your relationship is lacking to rebuild. Don't blame yourself though. Tempation is one of our greatest struggles...some don't always make the right choice.
2007-05-08 13:36:14 · answer #1 · answered by erin c 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What a bad situation! Of course he is cheating on you, he found a lover, what do you think?
You could deal with it! He is probably not gonna divorce you, because you bought the house and he is denying the fact, but he started treating you disrespectful, and this is a bad thing.
You can read some emails of his to make sure, it will help you face it.
It is up to you if you wanna leave him or stay.
2007-05-08 13:35:30 · answer #2 · answered by Lady of the Lowlands 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I caught my husband doing this six years in the past. Went with the aid of hell. theory it had stopped to locate he in basic terms became into extra advantageous at hidding issues. He had a six 3 hundred and sixty 5 days actual and emotional affair with a married lady. human beings in relationships should not be in chat that's approximately all that's for. placed a cease to it now, hint on the computer or in case you have not have been given any babies. go away it is going to in basic terms worsen. It finally ends up in cheating.
2016-10-15 03:42:40 · answer #3 · answered by pharris 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he wants to be trusted then he has to come clean and hide nothing. I would ask for open access to his email accounts etc. I would also let him know that hiding the history is not helping his case. Check his text messages and phone bill etc. If he hasn't done anything, fine. But he is crossing the line if you continue to find red flags.
2007-05-08 13:29:30 · answer #4 · answered by pinniethewooh 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well its a fact of life with the new era of internet, men finding, well let me rephrase that people finds new ways of cheating of course his lying to you. Maybe you could try and retrieve the message and get the e-mail and confront her. Most likely she doesn't know his married.
If you love your husband and he loves you then try and fix this talk to him calmly not with pots and pans.
But his change of attitude says he wants out, I really hope everything comes clear. And if it ends, just remember there is someone special out there for you.
Ji Ji maybe I should listen to my own advice.
Good luck, more power to ya sista.
2007-05-08 13:37:50 · answer #5 · answered by none 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
my man did the same thing so i got a hold of the computer and threw it out the up stairs window that put a end to that. now i have a computer that he cant use. men not all but most just cant help them self's. its like a kid in a candy store
2007-05-08 13:30:37 · answer #6 · answered by teadropsue 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's obvious that your husband was trying to hide something from you and he thought he succeeded. He said they never went to lunch, but he didn't deny asking her. There's something wrong with that because he hid it from you. You need to find a way to trust your husband. If you can't, then you have bigger problems to worry about.
2007-05-08 13:27:14 · answer #7 · answered by blue eyes 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Perhaps you can find out for sure, by emailing the women, as HIM. See how they respond. Then you'd know for sure. But then what would that really solve?
Sometimes life stinks, when partners arent honest with each other.
2007-05-08 13:32:27 · answer #8 · answered by iyamacog 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that you should tell him to stop lieing to you to tell you the truth about him and that girl it sounds like something was going on. I believe that if he's man enough to cheat he should be man enough to confront you and tell you the truth.
2007-05-08 13:42:33 · answer #9 · answered by cutebunny1122 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is lying and possibly cheating. Do you want to be with someone who is cheating or lying? If not you need to let him know that he needs to come clean if he wants to salvage the relationship.
Don't let him walk all over you.
2007-05-08 13:27:52 · answer #10 · answered by QT 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋