To all the single mothers.. DO you agree with this response I got about child support?

Question

YOU decided to have and keep this child, so tough! Take responsibility. This man obviously wants nothing to do with you, or your child so let him be. Women depending on child support is a way of life now a days. If you were financially unstable you shouldn't have had this child. Not to say what he did is right, but be better than him. Be everything your daughter needs you to be. One day this will make you and your daughter a better and stronger person. Don't think his life isn't hard as well. He has two other kids, they need to be taken care of, too.

SIDE NOTE: Put yourself in the shoes of the men you call deadbeats, as*h*l*s, losers, etc... try MAKING yourself responsible for a kid you have no feelings for, giving a large portion of your hard earned income to a stranger, being linked to a person you want nothing to do with. The U.S.A. has the dumbest laws on child support ever, and it is a shame that so many women are dependent of the law for revenge to make themselves feel better

Answer 1

I agree.

Everyone yelps about how it's the woman's choice to keep the child, that the man has no input when it comes to whether to abort the child or not.

Yet, when it comes to supporting the child, the man is equally responsible?

Seems like a double standard to me. If the woman wants to keep the child, and the man signs a legal document stating he wished to abort the child, he should have NO responsibility to support the child. I think at most, he should be responsible for paying for half of the cost of an abortion. End of story.

A decision that will affect two adults should be made by two adults. Giving one the power to make the decision, and making the other legally bound by it creates an atmosphere of indentured servitude.

Answer 2

No, obviously, the ladyhooked up with a deadbeat dad.

He created the other child first and the woman knew that when she hooked up so she should stop whining that your kids are not a priority under the law.

She needs to just remember your stance when he leaves her with a couple of mouths to feed not bothering asking him for any money to help her as she she take full responsibility to make her and her children better and stronger!

Answer 3

I don't agree with most of it, but In my honest opinion, one part is true. You have to admit, there are a lot of women who sit back and collect child support, and all other government benefis without ever trying to get out and get a real job. So yes, women depending on child support is a way of life for some.

There are also those women that go and get pregnant purposely to trap a guy up and then milk him dry for support as some kind of sick payback. Judging from the repsonse you got, this person, seems to be talking from experience or through somebody he or she has seen go through that, and that is why they gave the answer they did.

Either way, while I agree with the one part, the rest was just BS!

Answer 4

I can understand why you would disagree with the writers comments. However, as a single father I can understand his point of view. I'm not saying I agree, I'm simply stating I understand his feelings.

I do agree, that perhaps in an effort to be fair, you should try to look at the situation from the male point of view. Divorce is hell, especially when kids are involved. Yes, there are dead-beat dads out there, and non-custodial parents who try to skip out on their responsibilities, and that sucks, and it is unfair. But for every loser dead-beat dad, there are ten guys busting their butts to meet their responsibilities and be involved in the lives of their kids (as i do).

Sometimes, the law makes it difficult, and sometimes the parents involved make it difficult, but to a certain extent child support laws are against non-custodial parents. Like many other issues, too many people have pre-conceived notions about single dads (I've experienced them).

You don't have to agree with my point of view, but it may be helpful to try and understand why some guys feel the way they do.

Answer 5

looks to me like it was written by te wife of a cheating husband...a woman who doesn't want her husband's income to go to another child. Well the man is just as much to blame as the woman - it takes two to make a baby...and if he didn't want to pay child support, he should have been more careful (or should I say, faithful!)

Nothing but an ugly situation that an innocent child (or more) has the misfortune to get wrapped up in. If you are the mother...save that letter and go after all the child support you can squeeze out of him. If you receive more letters like this, file a harrassment complaint.

Answer 6

This is one of those times when I wonder how some people survive in the world. Many people do not think or listen to what they are saying. If this person did, maybe they would stop talking so ridiculously. Who said this?

Answer 7

Tough cookies. When a man chooses to enter conjugal relations with a woman, he is inherently accepting the risk that a child may be concieved by this union. It's not the baby's fault who his or her parents are, and that child still needs diapers, food and education. He accepted the child the moment penis penetrated vagina, and the only people who you'll find denying this are men who are too immature to accept responsibility.

Answer 8

Clearly written by some jackass wanting to get out of paying child support. It takes two to make a baby, it shouldn't be the sole responsibility of the woman. If he doesn't want any more kids he should stop having sex or get a vasectomy. Enough said.

Answer 9

Yes you are right there are many dead beat dads but there are many lazy mothers who ruin the lives of the father.

These people are just angry because the system favours mothers versus fathers. This is sexist and must stop or responses like that will only get worse.

Answer 10

men and women have to be accountable for bringing humans into this world...women need to have responsible birth control...Don't put the whole thing on the man!!
source: a father that paid support for 22 yrs