why are we so good at giving advice yet are always stuck on our own dilemas?

Question

something that baffles me, if we are in a dilema we ask for help yet we could see the very same question on here and answer it wholeheartledly which made me think to myself,,, why are we so good at giving advice yet we cant act upon it ourselves all the time. i think sometimes we answer our own questions without knowing it... i was just wondering what others opinion on it were?

Answer 1

I agree with you, I have also thought about that too at one point.

.I was thinking the same thing, and wondering how when I have the same problem(s) as someone else...I am able to answer their question and give them advice, but for some reason I find it difficult to practice what I preech?!

.I am not sure if it's a subconcious thing where we just don't think "Hey that's my problem too, I guess I could take my own advice."

....maybe it's not that easy to take it from yourself, as it is to take it from other people.

....to me when I look at my advice it seems right for that person, but I guess it doesn't get through to me unless I hear it from someone else.

.....ugh....*

Answer 2

This one is easy. We can give advise alot easier because were not in the hot seat. You know how it is when your in that hot seat. You start thinking to much and second guess things for the simple fact that your actions will have a consequence and those consequences reflect on our lives and we wouldn't want something bad happen in our lives now do we. Anouther thing is that giving advise we think alot clearly and understand the situation from the 3rd person perspective. That's why we ask others for advise, to get a second opinion and make sure the one decided is right. Now some people don't need advise and those are the people that are cool headed, confident, have no feelings, and amoung other things.

Answer 3

to look at ourselves takes courage and incredible honesty... so many prefer to try and advise others, it is easier.

Also to truly change ourselves, we need to be calm and peaceful inside. Most people do not have a good way to enter this state and weed out out personal dilemas at the root.

http://www.suprememastertv.com

Answer 4

I think that when you're actually in a situation, it's harder to see things clearly and objectively. When you hear about someone's else dilemna, you don't have emotions and feelings getting in the way of your judgment. That is why I always turn to others for advice when I have a problem. Usually, other people give me a fresh perspective on things.

Answer 5

It's easier to look at things from the outside, you can think rationally when it's someone else. I worked in Information and Advice for 8 years and could help anyone sort out just about any problem in their lives and yet I can't sort myself out at all, I go to someone else!! It's very strange!

Answer 6

It's easy to answer questions when they are someone else's dilemma -- there are no feelings or consequences at stake to cloud our judgement. It's much harder to be honest with yourself when it's your own problem. A history, feelings, fear of the unknown all contribute to bad decision making. If they pick yours as the best answer, often times it's something they already knew themselves but needed affirmation. And whose to say any of us are taking the advice offered any way? Ah well.

Answer 7

I guess that when its your own problem you can get more worked up about because it directly affects you, whereas if its some else that your helping out or giving advice to you see it in a different way. You're not really worrying about it so much so maybe can see things more clearly.

Answer 8

It's a lot easier to try to help solve someone elses dilemas. Sometimes we don't want to face up to our own problems.

Answer 9

Your right about knowing the answer to our own problems. But, when it's happening to 'you', it's the world crashing down. Sometimes seeing other people with worse problems than us makes us see our issues aren't a big deal.
Sometimes answering other people's problems makes our problems temporarily disappear. Giving people advice itself can be therapy for our own issues.

Answer 10

That is such a great question!! You hit it on the head....I think sometimes we are too close to the situation to answer our own dilemas.