Have you cheated by sleeping with the person you are in love with if you waited for everything (any form of physical love) until you filed for divorce and you no longer are in love with your spouse?
2007-05-08 02:18:02 · 28 answers · asked by QueenMoofMoof 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I think that to cheat one must have a commitment to another. If you and your spouse have decided to end your marriage and there is no longer the commitment or expectation there then I wouldn't consider it cheating.
2007-05-08 02:23:55 · answer #1 · answered by NewMom28 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't worry about it. Technically, everyone says that it is until the divorce is final, but divorce isn't considered right either so its really up to you. Divorce was looked down upon until the later part of the last century, which meant a lot of people were cheating on their spouse. I consider that since your relationship really started after filing the lesser of two evils. Its better to have it after you filed then before. Legally, I'm not sure if it is adultery or not but most states have a no fault law in divorce now anyway. The only chance he might have to benefit from your relationship is if he can prove that it is the reason you are divorcing. I'm not sure though.
2007-05-08 03:02:12 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ethically and by definition yes... BUT....
I was separate from my ex-husband for over a year when I started dating my current husband... and was only divorced a year into the relationship... so there was an overlap and I'd do it again. Once I found the love of my life, there was no stopping it. We moved in together almost right away. That was 3 years ago and we are married and have our first child now. :)
It's important that you are both completely detached from former lovers before starting this new relationship, or the foundation will have cracks and it will haunt you for a long time. So... although it worked for me, I'd be extra careful.
2007-05-08 02:28:54 · answer #3 · answered by babygnugnu 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, I dont think it is cheating.
In Australia once you are separated you are not considered 'together' and you are only still married by law. It seems in the US you are considered married until divorced.
(it takes a year of being separated here to be able to get divorced).
Does it matter if you are cheating? You know in your heart you are not doing anything wrong - you are no longer with your ex husband - you are not living together and you are about to be divorced.
Go for it - enjoy your life and be happy
2007-05-08 02:24:07 · answer #4 · answered by Olivereindeer 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No I don't think so, once you file for divorce you are legally apart and it isn't considered cheating in the eyes of the court. From a moral situation you need to make that call on you.
2007-05-08 02:23:33 · answer #5 · answered by Interestedinknowing 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am in the same situation as you are. A Friend once told me to never miss a chance at happiness so I don't. I loved my husband we were together 12 years but the love is gone. I filed for divorce and soon after I met someone. My husband wanted to get back with me soon after. I told him that once I had been with someone else being with him again would make me a cheater and I am not that person. I explained to him in my mind we were over there is no going back. This hurt him a great deal because I was admitting to having had sex with someone else. So to me as long as you have truly ended it in your heart and head and don't participate in ex-sex its not cheating.
2007-05-08 02:54:59 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think once you file for divorce, you've morally ended the relationship, and it is simply a matter of working through the legal separation. So I would not consider it 'cheating'. You've allready served notice to your ex that your relationship is over.
2007-05-08 03:14:32 · answer #7 · answered by kheserthorpe 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The techinical answer? Yes - you're still married until the divorce is final. On the other hand, when my husband decided he wanted to be with someone else, I started a rebound relationship with some random guy (before my divorce was final) - so I have no room to preach! At least you love the guy you're with.
2007-05-08 02:26:34 · answer #8 · answered by reandsmom77 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, you are still married. Don't date for a year after you are divorced, just to get everything settled and your head on straight. If you have kids, wait a LOT longer.
2007-05-08 03:08:16 · answer #9 · answered by Lydia 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you kept from being physical (sex) with your husband when you filed for divorce because you no longer loved him, and were sleeping with your lover only throughout the entire divorce process, then no that wouldn't be cheating because the marriage was over when you filed.
2007-05-08 02:53:06 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋