Should I move away from life?

Question

I was working a 9-5 job for about a year and very suddenly my father passed away at age 45. This has disturbed my life in great detail as it was very unexpected. I have 2 little 1/2 brothers that had to move to Whistler, BC to be with their mom (my ex stepmother). I was very unhappy with life so I decided to get a change of pace and I moved to Whistler to be with my brothers and also try and move on from my father's death. I lived in Whistler and loved it for about 6 months. I was then offered an amazing job with the company I left to first move to Whistler. I thought this is what I wanted so I packed up and moved home. I now find myself in this rut again. So should I just give up on this amazing job and move away again or should I try and stick it out. I had a lot of people push for me to get this position and I feel really bad if i just give up 2 months in but at the same time is it really worth me being unhappy?

Thanks everyone. I honestly don't know what would make me happy all I know is that I'm not happy right now. I don't think it is fully the job I think it is my lifestyle out here. When I was in Whistler I was working at a restaurant and it was awesome, back working 9-5 my life is I feel useless. I go to work come home do some paperwork go to bed at 10 and do it all again the next day and for what? I'm completly stuck in the middle and wish someone would just make the decision for me and tell me to go or to stay and that's it.

I did move away and it did fix things the first time. But I think I just was escaping from reality. I was too busy in this new lifestyle in a new town to think about my dad. I still thought about him everyday as I still do, but I found myself not crying as much and trying to be happy whereas here I just feel sorry for myself.

Answer 1

i think you need to take some time, and drive to a nice quiet place. then you need to think about what you want, not those other people in your life. you know sometimes its ok to do what you want to do, its not being selfish. think about what will you most benefit from, what do you want to do, what is best for you. sounds like youv been througha lot the past little while, and i think you just need some time to sort it all out and figure out whats best for you

Answer 2

I am not sure why you are unhappy?!? My father passed away at 47, which is a deal in itself. Living by family helps the coping skills and time skills with dealing with it. It's a tought deal which off and on has taken me 10 years to get over. You go through phases denial, mad, sad, acceptance.

If the job is great and pay well - stick out for a little longer until the dust settles down. Can you find equally a good job else where or is this a one time great chance?

Is the rut because of the town of things that happened? What are you looking for - new love life, new job, new beginnings?
You could move to a nearby town and yet still drive to the whistler for you job which might be the best of both worlds. Close to home, yet still independent.

Answer 3

Really great jobs aren't nothing if yer miserable! I do think it is alittle soon though. Your proably just feeling lonely and need to meet some people or at least hang out with someone. Maybe a little trip back to Whistler will make you feel better. Ive followed my parents all over the country and settled back where we all started sunny SoCal. I cant live far from my parents...I'll admit it! But I have tried. Maybe thats what your doing and finding out that you can or cant do it.
Make yourself happy girl! Good luck ;)

Answer 4

Somehow I think you have not grieved your father passing. You can run to other places but those thoughts and feelings will return until you get help. There are groups you can go to for people who have lost a loved one. I imagine you may feel abandoned, finding it difficult to not be confused with your chocies. If you find a grief therapist it maybe a great help. Talking with someone that has been in simular situations could help. You may not be able to feel good about life and your circumstances and the good job, until you get things strightened out!
Best of luck!

Answer 5

I was almost in the same pickle you are in, except it was in highschool, and I had a bunch of stupid girls make fun of me. I got really stressed out, and figured that if I switched schools, I would get away from those problems forever. Turns out that leaving just created more problems, such as drugs, and alcohol abuse [and I also had a friend pass away.. so I know how your feeling] and I was more miserable than I was at my old school. Just from past experiences, I would say stay where you are.. It may seem so crappy now, but things will work out for the best! I'll pray for you and that everything goes good.

Answer 6

I agee with luckford! You should explain to the people who got you the job first. That would be the respectful thing to do! You should try to work out there for a while,and save some money. So when you leave,you will have some cashflow to fall back on. Good luck...

Answer 7

No. It's definitely not worth being unhappy. Remember, YOU come first. Always. It can only be one way. I think deep down you know which way that will be. Everything will work out for you. I promise. Good luck and be happy! P.S. I'm really sorry about your father.

Answer 8

Only you can contemplate and know whether or not a change in geographical location will help this at all or not.

Personally, (IMHO), I don't picture a change in locale to be my savior. I have problems with racism, having no friends, and where I live reminding me of the many years of life I've wasted away as a virtual prisoner in a very unfriendly town, but moving away won't automatically mean friends for me.

Of course, our situations are different.

Answer 9

life is a drag sometimes and it is hard when a love one passes. I know how you feel, but you know i never felt better runnimg away, i mean yeah i felt bettere for about the first 2 months then it was the same. So just follow your heart and you will think about him, sometimes it helps me if i talk about it. Good luck all keep you in my prayers.

If you want extra prayer sign up here it is free.... www.ilj.com

Answer 10

It sounds like you'd be happier being in Whistler.