Why do Doctors, Lawyers, etc, not listen ? This has become very frustrating and painful. Pls help!!?

Question

I fell @ a friends and hurt myself, since my Dr. was looking after my back, he ignored my fall. 7 mths later I got him to MRI. It showed torn rotator cuffs, tendons torn on both shoulders. I just had surgery Apr.2./07 My fall was July 28/06.
The lawyer bit...due to not being able to live on $900.00 a mth.,
I had to tell my boss, friend that I had to sue his insurance. He took it personal and is now suing me for $13k. (My pays.)
He is just doing this to hurt me. He filed in the farthest court he could, knowing that I cannot drive, due to the fall. The 1st lawyer did not keep me up on correspondance, wrote letters without speaking to me, getting my surgeon furious, etc.
We did not click when he seemed to believe what the Ins. said, without asking me about anything. He stated things wrong that I had told him. This is the same with the doctor(s).
I am now looking for a "go get 'um, contingency, help me while we're going through this lawyer...and a Dr. that really listens.
Thanx

Answer 1

You should be writing them and telling them exactly how you feel. Everything is paperwork in their professions and many others, just talking won't help you, some people ramble on. Just keep in mind that being able to get everything down on paper properly is power.

Answer 2

Sounds like you have a lot of people who don't care about you in the position to exert heavy control over you. You need to shake up the team and see about getting new doctors and a new lawyer (as well as a new boss/friend).

I have a chronic illness and I am a disabled Veteran. I have seen well over 100 doctors in the course of my illness so I know a thing or two about working with doctors.

First the doctor is the leader of your health care team, but you are one of the principle members. You have to take an active role in your health care. I do that and most of the doctors I have met appreciate it. I have suggested medications that I wanted to take, medications that I didn't want to take and a change in treatment. When something doesn't work for me I am not afraid to tell the doctor this and to seek a better option. At first this is going to sound like drug seeking; when a person is either trying to get drugs that make you high or the wonder drug that will cure all their problems.

If the doctor had such a drug he would have tried it by now. If he had some wonder routine that would cure all your problems then he would have tried that as well. Remember that doctors call it a medical practice, not a medical profession. Patients die and bad things happen. I have a friend who broke his arm and a doctor that didn’t do a good job or give good advice, he didn’t put my friend in a cast and after a week he told him to take the sling off. As a result one arm is a full inch shorter than the other arm. To get things back to the way they should be he will probably have to have his arm re-broken. Doctors are far from perfect, we just put that kind of confidence in them.

When I see a doctor I present them with a 1/2-1 page position paper. I tell them what I am feeling/thinking and what I want addressed. I never leave the doctor's office thinking, "Oh I wish I had told him this..." I also include a list of all the medications that I am taking. One of the most common means of death for long-term patients is through a drug interaction. My doctors know what drugs I am taking, the dosage and amounts and they can easily see, on one page, if there are any problem combinations. I am a little shy, I can stutter, and I may not be in the best of moods or in the best frame of mind when I finally see a doctor. I have taken the opportunity to iron out all the details and cover all the points in a brief paper that I give to the doctor. Since I type this out on the computer I also have a written record of what I said at the visit. I have even seen a doctor use my paper in replace of his notes, he just adds a few things and is ready to add it to my file. This lets me make the best use of my time during the visit. I take an active role in my health care and doctors that treat me see that, and they like it. Too often they have a patient who comes to them and says, “Doctor I am sick heal me.” Then they don’t take any responsibility to themselves, if you work with them, and take responsibility even just a little then it will make your doctor visits more pleasant and it will give you more say in what is being done to your body. Also when you have something like a fall that is causing you great pain. If you write it out then the doctor is less likely to ignore you.

I haven’t had a lot of experience with lawyers, but I would try something similar. Give them a document stating what your needs are, your concerns, and what you would like to have done. When I have done this with doctors they have either agreed with me or given me a sound medical reason to not agree. Either way they listen, you need something similar to make the lawyer listen. Lawyers read forms and documents all day long, sometimes reality doesn’t seem as firm as is what is written down on a piece of paper. So take advantage of that. If the lawyer can’t meet your needs then it is time to find someone else.

The lawyer is working for you and you do have a right to ask for a copy of the lawyer’s paperwork. It is a little unusual, but not beyond normal business practice. This will help with your doctor receiving notes from the lawyer that make him angry without you knowing what is going on. You can also tell the doctor that the lawyer sent them correspondence without your knowledge and it didn’t reflect on your true feelings or attitudes about the treatment. The lawyer may mean well, but he is used to working in an adversary role and one hallmark of the profession is being antagonistic. He may have done so with you and gotten a bit carried away. Who knows your lawyer may be looking to set up a malpractice suit against your doctor?

As for your boss and his insurance company, you might want to try for an out of court settlement. Most things are handled this way and it is easier for both parties and removes the need of court appearances. If your former boss is playing games with you by using a remote court then there are things that your lawyer can do to counter the games. He can schedule dispositions and meetings to be held at a time and date that is inconvenient to your boss in a place that it equally inconvenient. Your friendship with them has died and may never be recuperated, but if you lost this friend that easily then you didn’t have a true friend.

Answer 3

They do not become christians when qualified they merely conform to the conditioning they received as a very, very young child! Acceptance of a supernatural claim tends to promote cooperative social relationships. This communication demonstrates a willingness to accept, without skepticism, the influence of the speaker in a way similar to a child's acceptance of the influence of a parent. By encouraging this kind of behavior where the most intense social relationships occur it facilitates the lack of skepticism and deters more open minded thinking. They are christian, Muslim or the other religions depending where they were born simply because they were indoctrinated by their parents as very young children. They will go on to indoctrinate their own children and those will go on to indoctrinate their grandchildren! Atheists have the intellect to see through the conditioning and escape into the real world! Agnostics have the intellect to see through the conditioning but lack the courage to throw of the conditioning entirely. Sadly Christians, muslims and others are still held firmly prisoner by the self perpetuating brainwashing! The truth is that the professional level jobs reflect very few christian participants! Research has shown atheists have a higher intelligence than people with a strong religious faith. The difference is 5.8 points according to findings in developmental psychology! More members of the "intellectual elite" considered themselves atheists than the national average. Only 7 percent of members of the American National Academy of Sciences believed in God. Whilst only 3.3 percent believed in God in the UK’s Royal Society. Several Gallup poll studies of the general population have shown that those with higher IQ’s tend not to believe in God."

Answer 4

What area do you live in? If you live anywhere in Southern California, I have and excellent doctor to recommend to you that will not only help you with the physical part, but with the legal part as well! He helped me through a work injury and listened better than any doctor I've ever had.

Answer 5

What do you excpect from sleepy docs from workin all day, lawyers losin a case? The are over tired and sometimes are wierd because they dont like u.

Answer 6

ya ....sometimes doctors and lawyers ....just get onto ur nerves ...by the way where r u living ....so i can figure out the type of doctors or lawyers u r talking abt

Answer 7

yup it is.