me and my fiancy have been 3 years together ,we love each other but the problems between us is too much every day we fight ,today we had a fight and he was trying 2 calm me down but inside my heart i cant handle anymore ,i came home and i left him my mobile coz i dont want him 2 contact me i want 2 rest ...i love him so much i tried 2 tell him to change his treatment with me but he didnt ...every one is seeing me one day happy and one day crying ,,i dont know what to do now?!i should call him or just leave him till he come 2 my house ??i love him but iam tired from my life with him ..help me plz
2007-05-07 10:42:42 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
it sounds to me that you are in a verbally abusive relationship. you cannot control the way the man is toward you, he is obviously an a!! and the only person that can change the man is himself. if this has been going on for 3 years and it hasn't stopped :( fighting everyday during those 3 years i bet your self esteem is in the dumps and it is because of this man. i wouldn't put up with this crap any longer. if you want a happier life i would say you are going to have to leave this man. life is way too short to be feeling this way. you don't want to spend your life crying. be strong
2007-05-07 10:52:08 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You love him but you're tired from your life with him? And you ask what to do. My dear....and take no offense please...are you silly or stupid?
"Love" means that you're perfectly willing to give over half of your life, time and devotion to this man. To stay with him until one of you shuffle off this mortal coil. Yet..this doesn't appear to be a commitment you're willing to readily accept.
Think girl...think. Is this the life that you want to live until old age?
You may very well love him. Love him for some of his good and affection points. Yet...you don't love him for others. But the information you provided is sparse at best. What was the fight over? What has all this disagreement you've been having with one another revolve around? Sure..married people fight. Not physically of course unless you're a Neaderthal and have no self control, patience and logical to discuss your problems civilly.
So...what's the root of the problem. Every try discussing it rationally with him? Lets put if this way. If you've tried to discuss any problems with him as in an adult manner and he shouts, screams, raises a hand to you, breaks/strikes inanimate objects or threatens you with physical abuse in any way or verbally abuses you...then leave.
2007-05-07 17:52:57 · answer #2 · answered by Quasimodo 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hon, I went through the same thing with my husband. I ended up leaving him. It was hard, but it was the best thing I have ever done. If you want to email me, I am here. I know exactly how you feel too.
Look, its no life to be happy one day and sad the next. Make a change for yourself and for the better. There are so many great guys out there that will treat you right. Thank God you are not married yet.
2007-05-07 18:26:16 · answer #3 · answered by kim_faut 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweety, I m in the proces of writing my third book concerning the trait, good and bad, of mn and women. In a time such a this, you need to take some "me" time. Still do the things that ar your responsibilitym but when it has all ben done, choose mall, or just go somewhere. This allows you AND him to think, about the other, and pesumly begin to miss. This will generlly give an idea of how life ould be without the other.
2007-05-07 17:51:50 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Out of that whole paragraph, here's what you said that matters most "I am tired from my life with him". You said it yourself. You're tired. If you want to work this out, break up for a while. Find yourselves, figure out what makes you happy and what the issues are between you. Then come together, address those issues and see if you can resolve them. If not, walk away. If so, then vow to work hard and respect each other enough to be kind, even when you fight.
2007-05-07 17:48:48 · answer #5 · answered by Dr. Kat 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why exactly do you fight? does he hit you? does he belittle you? bring you down? if so then I would suggest leaving him...love hurts sometimes but not all the time. If you love him and you and him just fight about little stuff...then couples couselling is great and there is no shame in admitting you need help. or just sit him down, in a neutral environment and tell him what your missing from him as a partner and what he is missing from you as a partner. Good Luck
2007-05-07 17:47:46 · answer #6 · answered by wildkuntry07 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
In ur letter u said u can't handle him anymore. You didn't say how he was treating you. If he's abusing u, then u leave him and get help. Are you suffering from any type of depression?
EITHER WAY YOU SOUND LIKE YOU NEED A BREAK FROM HIM.
If you do nothing then nothing will happen, get help.... like a trusted friend.
2007-05-07 17:51:42 · answer #7 · answered by diamond257 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
u are going through depression if u are happy one day and crying the next. you have too much going on and you need to spend some time looking after yourself. this guy is not your responsibility he is causing all the troubles you are having get this is not love its infatuation of the weirdest sort. some one who loves you doesnt make you this unhappy
2007-05-07 17:48:40 · answer #8 · answered by alroka 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not sure what all the fighting is about. But sounds like you need a month to relax and be alone to think.
2007-05-07 17:56:40 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you're fighting every day then you need to not make any wedding plans right now. Go to counseling and see if you guys can make it work before you go back to making wedding plans.
2007-05-07 17:47:03 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋