Help! I need to find a way to help my friend. He had sex once with a woman & had nothing to do with pregnancy or delivery (didn't even know baby was born) but...baby is now almost 2!! and he's to pay child support?? She had ALL the choices (abortion, adoption, KEEP) He didn't want to be a father ...he wanted him put up for adoption & now he has to pay? Where are his choices? This mother has 4 total children to 3 different fathers! My friend is Father #3 of child #4. How many times does this woman get to collect money from men? My friend doesn't want to go back to work because he won't be working for himself anymore!?! Can anyone give me some kind of lead to how we can have the Agencies or Courts see it his way? Thanks in advance for your opinions & ANSWERS!
2007-05-07 08:42:52 · 8 answers · asked by hurricane423 2 in Politics & Government ➔ Law & Ethics
State of Ohio
2007-05-07 08:46:41 · update #1
He knew she was pregnant but she told him to go away & that he was upsetting her. They talked about condoms & she said she didn't like them & that her tubes were tied. 29 days later....a positive pregnancy test & for him to go away! He tried visitation & he hated it...all the other "Daddy's"....trailer...he didn't want ANY offspring & especially doesn't want his brought up like that!
2007-05-07 08:58:15 · update #2
He's out of luck. :( My husband ended up in a similar circumstance (before we were together) and we tried and tried to get help. There is no rights for fathers in this country - unless you can afford to have lawyers fight for you.
Men have no choices, except to wear a condom or not. Once they forego that, they are up a creek without a paddle. :(
He will have to pay child support and they will get him for back support too. They try to take OUR taxes every year (even tho' hubby is retired so all tax money is MINE from working 40 hrs per week) to pay for HER hospital bill from YEARS ago (before we were married)!!!
It sucks. Tell him to INSIST on a DNA test.
I wish him better luck than we've had. :)
2007-05-07 08:51:43 · answer #1 · answered by searching_please 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Well, if your friend was responsible and used protection while he is banging women, he wouldn't be a daddy now, would he?
It doesn't make any difference if he wants kids or not - if he wants anything to do with the baby or not - whether he wants visitation or not...he helped bring this child into the world and he is responsible to pay child support....period....
The only way he can get out of it and avoid his responsibility is to get a lawyer, go to court and give up all parental rights to the child... He would no longer be the father, would have no rights as far as the kid is concerned and wouldn't have to pay child support.
Stop blaming the woman..... Should she use birth control? Sure. Is she irresponsible? Sure... She is paying for it by giving birth and having the responsibility to raise the child. Your friend also had choices...he made the choice to have unprotected sex...he is a big boy and knew the risks....now he will pay for it..
Advise him next time he gets horny, buy and use a condom......
2007-05-07 16:07:24 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
If your boyfriend didn't want to be a father, why did he take that risk? The fact that she lied is no excuse. He didn't know her well enough to take her word for something so important.
If he thinks the baby is being raised badly, he can fight for shared custody. That's exactly what I'd do, if I were him.
He didn't want to be a dad, but he blew his chance to be childfree for one night with a woman he barely knew. Now the important thing is for him to do right by his innocent child.
If your BF really didn't want children, why didn't he get a vasectomy before something like this happened?
2013-09-28 19:13:27 · answer #3 · answered by Pegatha 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Even if he only had sex once with the woman, he still produced a child. Chances are, the mom wasn't looking for child support from him (considering she didn't even let him know she was pregnant), but that she needed to go to welfare or some other social service agency--and they made her state who the father was--they do that.
Even if she had 10 children with 10 different men, each would be required to support his own child--that's the law. If men don't want to do this, they should NEVER have unprotected sex, and they should remember that it only takes ONCE to get pregnant.
2007-05-07 15:53:43 · answer #4 · answered by Holiday Magic 7 · 4⤊ 1⤋
Anyone who had sex with a woman needs to be prepared for ALL the consequences. He made at least two choices: to have sex, and not to use protection. Now he chooses to complain about it!
Poor baby! Did the big mean lady force herself on him? He had a one night stand with someone and now he's boo-hooing on your shoulder?
Tell him to grow up, support his kid, and keep his pants zipped.
2007-05-07 15:56:12 · answer #5 · answered by Nurse Susan 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
he should have thought of that before he had sex and he should have worn a condom , that's it that's all NOW HE HAS TO PAY one way or the other he is the father so he should pay something to this child's up bringing
2007-05-07 15:53:36 · answer #6 · answered by jim m 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
He has NO choice. If DNA proves he's the biological father of the child, he will be required to pay child support.
The laws are clear and there is no way to have the court "see it his way."
2007-05-07 15:49:26 · answer #7 · answered by Starla_C 7 · 3⤊ 1⤋
He needs to get his visitation and parental rights.
Maybe he should fight for custody so she has to pay him.
It doesn't sound like either party is responsible to care about themselves much less a child.
She is obviously irresponsible.
But, other than that, he should've taken precautions.
2007-05-07 15:53:17 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 3⤋