do your parents or did you parents ever yell at you?

Question

they scream at you to do something and then they yell a your for doing it wrong.
I made me feel on edge, judged, like i could do nothing right.
I guess i've always thought this, but now i believe it.
I'm realizing not all parents do this, some of them are actually happy.

all the answers seem to be coming from the same place.
i guess what i was trying to say was, a lot of parents seem to have control issues and they pass their problems onto their kids. they don't to know the reason just that everythings fixed.

Answer 1

My dad wouldn't call it "yelling," every time I or one of my siblings would plead for him to stop yelling; he would loudly forcefully say he was not yelling. He would get this loud mean, hurtful condescending tone. He was always disappointed in me (and the others) for not doing things his way, but taking it and doing it my way (the way I understood it). Major control issues up untill i was 23. MAJOR!!!!!
Unfortuniately when that happens the children pick up those bad habits to an extent.

My mom hardly spoke to anyone in the family after I turned 8. So growing up, it was like i didn't have a mom, none of my friends growing up thought i had one. Her and my dad had MAJOR problems, they didn't even speak to each other for years; and IF they did they would yell and scream.

BUT.....being 28 now, both of my parents have grown exponentially after they got a divorce 10yrs ago. I have wonderful relationships with both of them, they are my best Friends. My father is, well you could say, almost a laid back guy. He still worries alot, but does not try and control everyone's life.

I had to sit each of them down and talk to them about what happened while i was a child, and i forgave them for everything that happened to me. After that, i they thought about what i had said...and a few months later, both of them (separately of course) came and apologized to me for the mistakes they made in my childhood. Getting it all out in the open changed them. (I really believe they didn't realize what they were doing) My dad never realized what that "need to be in control" did to us; and my mom never realized how her not being there for us effected us
.
Today They are not the people they use to be At All!!

I truly believe that families do not have to be like this, it is up to the parents to look outside the situation and realize the ramifications of all actions made towards their children and each other. And take positive steps to repair any damage that was done.
The first step is the self. Parents do not realize that they have to change their own belifs, values, and habits before they will see a positive impact on their life and the life of others around them.

Answer 2

If you suspect that your parents are not happy people, you're probably right.. Especially since they seem to take it out on you a lot...

If a parent manages to make their child LOSE confidence or feel emotional distress over the anticipation of mistreatment, then that parent is doing a TERRIBLE job of parenting... In fact a GOOD parent does exactly the opposite things...

A good parent will boost a child's self-esteem and will allow the child to fell loved and accepted in the presence of the parent...

Its good you realize this difference and that you're now beginning to understand that your parents may be BAD parents... Its OK to have bad parent! It happens to the best of us...

So now what? Now that you know how your parents are, what are you going to do with this new important information...?

Answer 3

Even happy parents will yell. Yelling is overused and rarely effective and not recommended but everyone has their limits. Children may feel like they are being judged because they are getting negative feedback even when parents are not yelling. It really is a parents job to judge the appropriateness of their child's behavior.

Answer 4

Man they do! But hey, no worries dont bottle it all up tell your mates or anyone.I used 2 keep it to myself and got ever so depressed.But dont let it bring u down and if things get real nasty call the teens help phone . dont be jealous of your mates if their parents seem nicer than yours. Even the best looking parent can get rel nasty behind closed doors or the worst parent can be really friendly. like i said b4 tell other people , including your parents that u have feelings. GO ON!

Answer 5

My parents were very loving and caring, but they did yell once in a blue moon, when i had them at their wits end!

Answer 6

My mother did, but luckily I had my dad to keep me sane. My parents had a very loving and healthy marriage, never once did I see them fight. But on the other hand when it came to children......there are "times" I don't feel that she was cut out to be a mom. Anytime growing up I felt that I just couldn't handle it anymore.........my dad was always there to pick me up ~ he is truly my best friend.

Now....I have been married for over 9 yrs, we have a gorgeous daughter. When she goes to "grandma's" house......I sit there in complete amazement at how wonderful she is w/ my daughter. Its mind blowing at times! :o)
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
"Where did we ever get the crazy idea that in order to make children do better, first we have to make them feel worse? Think of the last time you felt humiliated or treated unfairly. Did you feel like cooperating or doing better?"

Answer 7

Only my dad, it was his normal tone of voice to everyone. My mom spoke like a saint. He sounded like Archie Bunker on one of his more irritable days, and we all laughed at the show. He didn't physically resemble Archie Bunker, although everything else about him was the same. They would edit out a lot of words he used daily, and never show these on television. It was just his way, to the day he died, he talked this way to everyone. Expletive, deleted was often needed.
It wasn't whether he was happy, he was always this way. My uncles always lectured him about the way he talked, and he never listened. Such is life.

Answer 8

of course my mom yell at me (my daD WAS OUT OF THE PICTURE) she yelled when she was angry or upset but the worse part is when you can tell she's dissappointed in me 'cause she wouldnt talk or if she did you could barely hear what she was saying and I honestly would rather her yell at me for being angry than be dissapointed in me

Answer 9

Of course my parents yelled at me - how else was I to know what I was doing was wrong.....................................
There's absolutely nothing wrong with parents yelling at their kids but it is wrong if they do this when they do not feel well - then I feel sorry for the kid.

Answer 10

Sure they did, all the time. So I left home at 15 and haven't talked to them in 18 years. last year my mom needed a kidney, I was a match. hah thatyl teach her.